#mcpfbc

[riversing]

Oh my God SNL with Benedict Cumberbatch was abysmal. I don’t think it was his fault; he seemed to be committed and giving it everything he had. But the writing!! Where was the quality writing?? SNL is hit or miss, sure, but there’s usually at least ONE sketch that’s KINDA funny! 

Good lord, what a mess. I had to fast-forward through a bunch of it because it was so embarrassing.

[myclosepersonalfriendbc]

Wreckers Review

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS STOP READING SPOILLLEEERRRSSS

My Close Personal Friend Otherwise Known as Benedict Cumberbatch...

Was lovely, as always. Not a very sophisticated role or performance compared to many of his others, but wonderful to watch anyway. His chemistry with Claire Foy was gorgeous.

The movie overall...

Was a waste of time. And it made me angry.

If you’re going to depict rape, you’d better have a damn good reason. It had better be an ABSOLUTELY CRUCIAL PLOT POINT and actually visually depicting it had better be ABSOLUTELY ESSENTIAL. Because I don’t need to see another image of a woman getting brutalized. Rape can be explored, the truth about it can be told, women’s stories can be amplified and supported, without constantly reinscribing it in image, over and over again. 

Maybe I completely misunderstood this film, but what was interesting to me were the relationships between the wife, husband, and his brother. What was interesting to me was how these brothers related to each other now, and how the wife felt about continuing revelations about her husband. The rape had nothing to do with any of this. It had absolutely no point whatsoever that I could see.

I mean, honestly. I thought: “What the fuck? What does this have to do with anything?” And then it turns out that her husband is infertile, but the rape results in a baby...so there’s this bizarre way in which it’s therefore....a good thing?!?!? I mean, I can’t believe that was what the filmmakers were trying to say, but it was all so clumsy and pointless and depressing...

In short, do not recommend. My delightful Close Personal Friend has given tons of performances that rival and exceed this one, so, especially if you’re a woman, take your business elsewhere. This movie is perfectly fine, but not worth you having to watch a woman’s body get violated. Don’t do that to yourself. Take care of yourself.

[riversing]

I watched the new Hobbit movie trailer: A Nonsensical Collection of Rambling by Riversing

MIDDLE-EARTH

But I didn't like the first Hobbit movie much

LEE PACE

Wait his accent isn't that good

OH MY GAWD LEE PACE

BADASS FEMALE ELF

I love badass females who shoot things!!

Man, Martin Freeman is great. I love that guy.

Okay, blah blah blah where's the dragon.

Still no dragon.

Okay, maybe we won't see the dragon.

But I feel like...they're really building....

(Says out loud to the empty room): "Come on, come on...!"

DRAGON DRAGON DRAGON DRAGON

OH MY GAWD IT'S A PERFORMANCE CAPTURE DRAGON IT TURNED ITS HEAD THAT MEANS MY CLOSE PERSONAL FRIEND TURNED HIS HEAD IN A BLUE SUIT WITH DOTS BE STILL MY HEART

*Shrieks and runs around like a little kid who just got a trip to Disneyland for Christmas*

[riversing]

Star Trek Into Darkness Part 2

1. Benedict Cumberbatch can't possibly be human. He must be an alien. That's the only explanation.

2. Zachary Quinto: that was my Spock. You got it. You found him. Thank you.

3. They reversed it.

4. He said it.

5. They didn't ruin Starfleet. They proved once and for all that they understand Starfleet and what it means.

6. The guy who thought being a Real Man and a Good Warrior meant getting violent, killing people, and breaking the rules got his head crushed by a psychopathic superman.

7. The guy who thought being a real man meant sacrificing yourself for your ship, your crew, and your best friends got brought back from the friggin' dead. 

(Oh hey...where have I heard that before?)

8. THEY

REVERSED

IT

9. Uhura didn't just understand Klingon, she understood Klingons.

10. Scottie. Period.

11. They got Starfleet right. They got the Prime Directive right.

12. They avoided war. They took the villain captive so he could have a fair trial. They took drastic action to stop one of their own from starting a war. They blew up a ship only when it became absolutely necessary in order to save thousands of lives aboard their own ship.

They got it right. They got Star Trek right. They got the characters that I love with all my heart right.

I am so happy I could float away.

If nothing else...I'll always have this. Even if there's no next one or they screw up the next one.

I'll always have this.

[riversing]

Dear Benedict Cumberbatch,

Hello. You’ve never met me, but you mean a lot to me.

Did you ever wonder if maybe you shouldn’t be an actor?

Did you ever really want a role and then not get it and not understand why and feel stupid and incompetent?

Do you still wonder if maybe your next job is going to be your last one?

Or are you so talented and amazing that everyone has always wanted you and you’ve never had to face rejection?

Please tell me. Please help me. I’m lost and I don’t know what to do. I want to be as amazing as you but I don’t know if that’s possible. I want to act. I want people to give me a chance.

How do I do this? How do I figure out how to create a life that makes me incredibly happy, like you have?

Do you have any advice?

Too bad I can’t actually talk to you.

Your close personal friend,

Me