incorrect quotes for my mcstm dr to cope and connect
Ivor: Why am I the bad guy?
Aiden: I don't know, why am I the pretty one? We all have our thing.
Jesse: My expectations are low, but they can always go lower.
Ivor: Where's Lukas?
Aiden: Don't worry, I'll find them.
Aiden, shouting: Jesse sucks!
Lukas, distantly: Jesse is the best person ever! Fuck you!
Aiden: Found them.
Petra: I failed my safety training course today.
Lukas: Why, what happened?
Petra: Well one of the questions was "In case of a fire, what steps would you take?"
Lukas: And?
Petra: Well apparently "FUCKING LARGE ONES" isn't an acceptable answer.
Lukas: They called me the B-word.
Axel: Motherfucker doesn’t start with ‘b’.
Lukas, talking about Jesse/Me: WHAT THE FUCK I WAS ARGUING WITH THEM AND I SAID “OOH YOU WANNA KISS ME SO BAD” AND GUESS WHAT? THEY DID. THEY KISSED ME. WHAT THE FUCK WHAT DO I DO.
Jesse/Me: I scare people a lot because I walk very softly and they don't hear me enter rooms. So when they turn around, I'm just kind of there and their fear fuels me.
Aiden: I have a problem.
Ivor: Kill it.
Aiden: Can you chill for like, two seconds?
Olivia: One time I went to hand Aiden a bowl of soup. I wanted to say “Careful, it’s hot!”, and “Here’s your soup!”, so instead I blurted out “Careful it’s soup.”
Lukas: I’m sad.
Jesse/Me: Don’t be sad, because sad backwards is das.
Jesse/Me: And das not good.
Olivia: Is something burning?
Petra: My burning love for you of course!
Olivia: …
Petra: …
Petra: And the kitchen is on fire…
(i know what you are 0-0)
Ivor: When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Ivor lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the person who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!
Axel: Ooh, somebody has a crush
Lukas: Pfft, I don’t have a crush on Jesse I just think they’re cool, it’s not like I stay up at night thinking about them.
*Later that night*
Lukas, very much awake: Uh oh.
Axel: Guys, I have a question.
Jesse/Me: kys <3
Axel: I love you too.
Lukas: Ah, yes. Siblings.
Jesse/Me: Are you coming to bed?
Lukas: I can't. This is important.
Jesse/Me: What?
Lukas: Someone is wrong on the internet.
Jesse/Me: Respect my trans homies or I’m gonna identify as a fucking problem.
Lukas: Why do you hang out with me?
Jesse/Me: You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me!
Lukas: …
Lukas: I feel a bit sorry for you.
Axel: Advice of the day kids, if you ever meet someone who calls Gatorade flavors the actual name of the flavor instead of just the color then they are a certified nerd.
Petra: Yeah but you have to specify, frost glacier or cool blue? You can’t just say blue because there’s more than one blue.
Axel: Blue and light blue, nice try nerd.
Petra: Okay, what does A stand for?
Jesse/Me: Arson.
Petra: Aw, you're so good. Okay! B! What does B stand for?
Jesse/Me: Barson.
Ivor: *laughter*
Petra: What stands for C?
Jesse/Me: Commit arson.
Ivor: Oooo. Petra: D!
Jesse/Me: Don't come near me, I'm going to commit arson.
Ivor: *more laughter*
Axel: Hey do you wanna hang out this weekend?
Lukas: Generic excuse.
Axel: I can’t believe you said that out loud, to my face.
Lukas: I can.
Jesse/Me: When I first got my autism diagnosis, my first thought was “woah… it’s canon” and I think that maybe thoughts like that is why Olivia made me get tested.
Petra: In your opinion, what is the height of stupidity?
Ivor, turning to Axel: How tall are you?
Ivor: So, did everyone learn their lesson?
Petra: No.
Axel: I did not.
Lukas: I may have actually forgotten one.
Jesse/Me: Also no.
Ivor: Oh good, neither did I.
Olivia: *Exhausted sigh*
Lukas: You have an impressive pain tolerance.
Jesse/Me: Thanks, it's the trauma.
Jesse/Me: If I die, my funeral will be the biggest party ever and you're all invited.
Petra: "If"
Axel: Great, the only party I'm ever invited to and they might not even die.