#medication m

[dragqueenpentheus]

someone explain how i just. didn't think i'd get withdrawal. scream.

[batz]

HEY im gonna get put on Meds(tm) soon so i can start functioning like a human person again LOL

is effexor any good??? also is zopiclone any good???

ive been on a Lot of different meds over the years so i tread w caution

[weirdo-with-a-nametag]

Forgot my adhd meds yesterday, went to work, it was. So hard. I was weeding n whatnot and my brain was like "i don't want to do this. Stop doing it. Stop. Stop. Stop. stop. Stop. Stop. Put it down. Stop pulling. I'm tired, stop pulling the weeds. Sit down. Just go home. Stop. This sucks, quit your job." And it was. So tiring.

Anyway..really glad to have meds, my god

[satanspersonal666]

Starting Ketotifen tonight... the "New Med Anxiety" is really a special type of scary

[thedevilscarnival]

i dont think my adhd meds are having any positive side effects all that’s happening is that i have a lowered appetite and fucked up sleep where’s my promised focus dammit 

[c-e-l-e-x-a]

Antipsychotic Drug Treatment

Hello everyone! I know I haven’t posted on this blog in a bit, but i needed to talk about how my treatment for schizophrenia has impacted my life. This is not meant to scare you or to substitute for actual medical advice, but it is meant to educate folks about an experience I am not alone in having. The rest is under a read more because it may get long.

I have been psychotic for most of my life. I remember having hallucinations as young as 5 years old but it was always brushed off as me having a good imagination. These hallucinations weren’t harmful or distressing, but that would soon change. When I was 8, I experienced some trauma that essentially made my psychosis get worse. I started to have delusions that were really distressing and I didn’t know what to do. I hid these symptoms for a long time because I was afraid. When I was 12, I had my first psychotic break. I was actively hallucinating most of the day, every day and I was convinced that what I was seeing and hearing and feeling was real. I was only in the 6th grade. I was so scared of what was happening to me that I told my parents and they were really concerned. I was sleeping on their floor every night and I had to have the lights on. This is also the age where my other mental health issues worsened. At this point, my parents wanted to get me help but I refused. I would not speak to a therapist or anyone else because I was afraid of being hospitalized. That was the worst thing that could ever happen to me in my mind at the time. The psychosis continued to ruin my life. I was cutting myself and having suicidal thoughts everyday. In 8th grade, I finally tried to kill myself. I was 13. I had told my friends what happened and they reported me to the guidance counselor, who called 211 and a crisis counselor came to the school to evaluate me. I lied about pretty much everything because I was scared, but she mandated that I seek counseling anyway. I started seeing a therapist and she recommended that I be evaluated by a psychiatrist. The psychiatrist wanted to medicate me for my depressive symptoms, but my parents did not allow it. They said I was too young to be on that type of medication. About a year later, I stopped getting counseling. But my symptoms were still present. When I was 15, I went back to counseling and this time my parents agreed that I needed to be medicated. I started off with antidepressants of all sorts- nothing helped. Actually, they often made me feel worse. Then I disclosed my psychotic symptoms and issues sleeping and I was put on Seroquel. Only 25mg at the time, but in the next few years that dose would increase to 300mg (which is still low for some people).This medication helped with the psychosis, but it didn’t ever go away. It also made me gain a significant amount of weight and as my dose increased, my cognitive abilities decreased. I was a good student but I quickly found it difficult to read and comprehend written words. I also couldn’t remember anything no matter how hard I tried. It wasn’t just school either, I was forgetting to do things at home too. I would consistently forget to do something my parents asked me to do if I waited more than 5 minutes to do it. I also couldn’t keep track of what time or day it was. Then, I had another psychotic break (even though I was taking my medication) and I ended up being hospitalized. This pattern repeated many times. In the next few years, I would be hospitalized for psychiatric reasons 6 times. When I was 20, I finally was able to come off of the Seroquel. I was inpatient at the time and I told the doctor that I could not keep taking it because it was not helping enough and I was having such severe side effects. I tried a few more antipsychotics, but the only one that worked was Vraylar. I maxed the dose on that pretty quickly but I was still experiencing psychosis daily. The cognitive symptoms that were brought on by the Seroquel never faded. I am now on ADHD medication to help with focus and memory but even that isn’t enough. I am so impaired that my grades in high school and now in college suffer. Even with accommodations, I am unable to learn in the same way my peers can learn. I cannot take my own notes in class, I can’t remember deadlines and material for exams. So far I have only had one professor that was willing to alter tests to make them more manageable for me. Multiple choice and true/false is the only format I can really do without great difficulty. Unfortunately, most of my exams are essay, short answer, or fill in the blank. I struggle to complete work because of the impact that my antipsychotic treatment has had on my brain. When my psychiatrist gives me tests to see how I am doing cognitively, I do not perform well. I can’t sort things into groups that make sense, I can’t spell words backwards (or forwards), I can’t  summarize a text. I just can’t do it without assistance. I have to use a screenreader to access reading material for school and I have totally abandoned the idea of reading for pleasure. I even have trouble writing and that is something I have loved since I was little. I am not confident that I will be able to obtain a college degree and get a job in the field I desire. My schizophrenia treatment has harmed me more than it has helped me. It has also harmed my friends and family because they had to see me suffer through these side effects for years. They had to watch me go from a super involved person to someone who isolates because I just can’t function in a neurotypical way. I have trouble getting dressed, taking a shower, feeding my dog- if I can’t do those things, how can I do anything else? And I was never once warned that these antipsychotic drugs could mess with me in such a significant and permanent way. I had to do my own research and bring it to my doctor who agreed that it was a possibility. I don’t think it is a possibility, I know it is a fact. I have suffered serious side effects that will probably never go away all because I wasn’t told it could happen to me and no one believed me when I said what was going on. Again, this isn;t to scare anyone, it is just to tell my story in hopes that you will research medication before taking it. Psychiatric medication can 100%m help and improve symptoms, but for some it comes at a cost. You have to be the one to decide if that cost is worth it for you. Be safe.

[xbox-nun]

I skipped two days of birth control and now I'm cramping n spotting 😑 but I didn't want any extra nausea especially considering I'd have to take it on an empty stomach especially especially that I've been taking a lot of charcoal to ease the food poisoning so it probably wouldn't do anything anyway... But yeah I took two pills today and I gotta take two tomorrow to make up for the days missed. Sure do love... Having a physical form lol

[androdragynous]

(medication / drugs m)

idk if this is like a relatable chronic pain feel or anything but like. i am absolutely terrified of having any dosage of painkillers or anesthesia bc it feels like ive gotten so used to the level of pain that i usually have that being exposed to a lessened version is just going to make going back to hurting the same amount be 200x worse.

and i really don’t know how to deal with that bc like. yeah! being able to pop an advil or whatever when i’m really sore would, probably, be a huge help! but im terrified of becoming addicted to... the sensation of not having pain, i guess? and it’s REALLY hard to get family or medical professionals to understand that yes, i do know this would help me, and yes, i know over the counter painkillers are not going to hurt me. i know that! i know these are beneficial! i just can’t justify the benefit when it’s temporary 

anyways i dont really talk much about my Personal Mess online (at least, not outside of dms or small groups) but like. its been REAL bad recently so maybe i will just to like... have some justification for why i have been particularly eclectic recently (nothing to be overly concerned about like i’m not going to drop dead it just Fuckin Sucks, in comparison to the average Regular Sucking)