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Change My Mind: Mel Kiper Has Lost His
EDITOR’S NOTE: The Unknown Blogger has made several appearances here at Dubsism, and this won’t be the last. He has finally agreed to be a regular contributor here even though he left the world of professional sports journalism a few years back vowing never to return. It’s OK because this blog is anything but professional. Today’s Argument: Mel Kiper Has Lost His Mind In case you missed…
Daft about the NFL Draft
Well, the NFL draft has concluded at last. Starting the day after the super bowl, the sports journalists start endlessly and mindless speculating about the draft. Football fans, particularly the bottom dwellers, get excited by the prospect that finally, THIS YEAR, the Colts, Redskins, Texans, etc. will have decent teams. There is actual history to demonstrate that having high draft picks will…
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Young, Stroud, Richardson, Levis - Why #Colts should & not take take each! Tobin/Kiper 29th anniversary! Oladipo snaps tendon!
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#Colts sign slot Isaiah McKenzie! Richardson or Levis - Mock Drafts disagree, but I know! #iubb will be patient filling holes!
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#NFLDraft - 5 bold #Colts predictions; Mel Kiper is a genius! Anthony Rizzo laughs during #Cubs blown out!
#NFLDraft – 5 bold #Colts predictions; Mel Kiper is a genius! Anthony Rizzo laughs during #Cubs blown out!
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Mel Kiper Jr. 2020 NFL Mock Draft Conference Call
About This Sports Courier NFL Video: ESPN football analyst Mel Kiper Jr. discusses his Mock Draft 4.0 ahead of the 2020 NFL Draft airing on ESPN and Network April 23-25. Kiper discusses draft prospects including Chase Young, Jake Fromm, Tua Tagovailoa, Joe Burrow, AJ Terrell, among many others. Plus: Kiper's thoughts on the New England Patriots replacing Tom Brady and Tennessee Titans having a backup plan at quarterback.
Now That’s What I Call Music! 7
Preface: Hi internet! I belong to a fantasy football league with my friends from college, and I lost this season! I received my punishment for placing last of the 12 teams, and I am required to listen to all of the Now That’s What I Call Music! compilations that currently exist (70 as of May 2019), review them (by rating each song on a scale of 1-10/10), and (at the end of this descent into madness) create my definitive power ranking of each album.
Album: Now That’s What I Call Music! 7
Release Date: July 31, 2001
Track Listing and Awarded Scores:
Average Score: 6.63/10
The Good:
Hey guys! [Name redacted] here! Just getting ready for a regular routine post about early 2000s music and how depressing this is and OH MY GOODNESS WHAT’S GOING ON
IT’S A GUEST POST FROM OUR PAL MITCH! Take it away.
Hi everyone, Mitch Kiper here. When I'm not reviewing fake football teams with voodoo math, I take breaks to join my pal [name redacted] on road trips and listen to Now compilation albums.
Now 7 was experienced months ago, on a trip down to the famous, known-by-all Santa Ana Observatory. The reason you're only hearing about it now is because [name redacted] fancies himself a bit of a Gandalf who can ride in whenever he damn pleases. But we all know this scrubs-wearing scrub is a Radagast at best. Amirite?!
*Plays custom crickets rap air horn*
Anyways, we listened to Now 7 on the way to Santa Ana to see the Lonely Island in concert, and while nothing can match the musical stylings of Jack Sparrow, not to mention the opportunity to sing it in a crowd and not be judged, NOW 7 was pretty dang good. My ratings are as follows:
1. Survivor - 8
2. All for You - 7
3. Baby Come on Over - 7
4. In My Pocket - 6
5. Play - 5
6. The Call - 10
7. Playas Gon' Play - 5
8. Ride Wit Me - 8
9. Danger - 6
10. Fiesta - 4
11. Let Me Blow Your Mind - 6
12. What Would You Do? - 8
13. Don’t Let Me Be the Last to Know - 3
14. This I Promise You - 7
15. Never Had a Dream Come True - 7
16. Hanging By A Moment - 4
17. Jaded - 5
18. From My Head to My Heart - 5
19. Flavor of the Weak - 8
These total to a starter %ile of 76%, a Bench % ile of 69 (nice), a RosScore of π^i and a Grade of B+. Well done Now 7. And thank you, [name redacted], for this invigorating guest post opportunity.
Mitch Average Score: 6.26/10
The Good (cont’d): Special thanks Mitch for the input. My other follower is going to go bananas when he sees this.
These albums are all starting to blend together. And no, it doesn’t help that I’m taking my damn time going through these.
High points include “Survivor,” “All for You,” the delectable bhangra-sploitation of Mandy Moore’s “In My Pocket,” and “The Call” - arguably the single greatest BSB song/video combination ever. Please check out the video, I’ll place it below. Despite coming out in 2001, the lyrics “my battery is low, so you know, we’re going to a place nearby, gotta go” remain to ring true to date in the high pressure world of dating while being an internationally renowned boyband and not sleeping with literally everyone.
^Directed by Francis Lawrence - absolute fucking legend of a video. WATCH IT
The Bad: The album doesn’t seem to peter out quite as badly as others, unless you’re Mitch in which case it DEFINITELY did that. I for one was particularly offended by Britney Spears’ “Don’t Let Me Be the Last to Know,” but it’s one of those songs that’s just so meandering and pointless that I have nothing quippy or interesting to say about it. I will post no link to it, she is awarded no points, and may god have mercy on her soul.
Potpourri: FUCKING MYSTIKAL. DANGER!
Song’s a red hot banger. Does it drag out about 2 minutes longer than it needs to be? Yes. Is it still culturally relevant? Just ask John Oliver or Carlos Danger.
Guy made his rap career yelling random things. Whether it’s shake yo ass (or “shake it fast” depending on who had cool parents or not) or DANGER(!), this song will stand all tests of time.
Takeaways: Eh it’s fine. There are good songs and okay songs and one bad song. This is hard.
NEXT IS NOW 8 WOOOOOOOOO
Current Power Rankings:
Now 4 (7.72/10)
Now 6 (6.89/10)
Now 2 (6.67/10)
Now 1 (6.65/10)
Now 7 (6.63/10) (Mitch score = 6.26/10)
Now 5 (6.58/10)
Now 3 (6.22/10)
Mel Kiper picks Eagles TE Dallas Goedert as one of his instant impact rookies
ESPN's Mel Kiper expects Dallas Goedert to have an immediate impact with the #Eagles.
Executive VP of football operations Howie Roseman and VP of player personnel Joe Douglas were able to get one of the players they would have used a first-round pick on despite trading back into the second round. Granted, the Eagles had to give up a fifth-round pick (No. 169 overall) to jump in front of the Cowboys to get tight end Dallas Goedert with their second-round pick.
RelatedEagles…
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