#meme: pace

[rxpunzelwrites-blog]

[bea/pace] "I think you deserve better than a girl who doesn't realise just how talented you are."

“I know she is no Eliza Schuyler, but I think if I tell myself that is she isn’t too bad then maybe I will start to believe it. Besides, I think she also deserves better than someone who has feelings for someone else.”

[rxpunzelwrites-blog]

pace/bea + ❝❞

[text] I probably shouldn’t have laughed at Cece today but if you were there you would have laughed too, but I suppose that would make her even angrier. She’s always angry though. I should probably explain. Basically, I managed to convince her to listen to Hamilton (are you one of those people that doesn’t like it when too many people like the thing that you like? If you are, then I am sorry) and she quite liked it which was awesome because we don’t have too much in common these days. But when we were singing ‘Guns and Ships’, it got to the line ‘give it up for America’s favourite fighting Frenchman’ and she shouted ‘Hamilton!’ when, as you know, she should have shouted ‘Lafayette’. I can almost hear you laughing already! I’m not sure what was funnier: the fact that she got it wrong or the look of horror in her eyes when she realised. I do not think anyone else in the cafe picked up on her mistake but they did wonder why I was laughing and that’s why she left and now I have no one to eat lunch with. Are you free?

[rxpunzelwrites-blog]

[pace/bea] [text] i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom

[text] Uh oh. They ran out of garlic bread, didn’t they?[text] I’m going to go to the store and get you garlic bread. It won’t be as good as Olive Garden, I do know that! But we cannot let you have a Les Miserables kind of breakdown over bread. You would be like Jean Valjean. A very cute and ginger Jean Valjean!

[rxpunzelwrites-blog]

[bea/pace] ▲

▲  five time my muse thought about kissing yours, and the one time they did.

one.

The girl in front of him is like nothing he has ever seenbefore and he knows his sister would instantly reprimand him from singling onegirl out and labelling her as unlike the rest of her gender, but he simply can’thelp it. If all girls were to be unique then he cannot help but think thatBeatrice is the leading example of this.

Her brightly coloured hair is what catches his eye first,but along with that comes a brash personality that upon a first glance wouldseem so similar to Cece’s. Bea, however, does not use her words to scold but totease and Pace is perceptive enough to know that there is a difference betweenthe two. Cece has brown hair and lips that only pout when she’s posing for apicture, but Bea’s lips are clear for him to see, full and pink without theeffort of trying to make them noticed.

Shame curls up in his gut as the New Zealander talks aboutmusicals – at this point, he’s not entirely sure which one she’s explaining –and he realises that there is one way in particular he could get her to quietendown. He does not necessarily wanther to stop talking, just to slow down so the words will not jumble into oneanother and become an unintelligible dialect that he fails to understand. Hebites down hard on his bottom lip as if to suppress the urge. He knows it’s nota real urge. Pace thinks that girlsare pretty all the time and Emmeline reassures him that it does not mean he’s unfaithfulto Cece who always allows her eyes to wander towards the tall, muscular framesof random men in the street. It does not meananything.

It’s the fact that he thought about kissing this strange newgirl at all that serves to make him feel guilty.

two.

Pace is glad when Bea complies, the girl immediately jumpingat the chance to dance for him. He’s not sure exactly in which direction he’staking his movie but a mismatch of different talent from all over the worldcould easily fashion itself into a scrapbook of dancers and actors and singersthat fully encompass the dream his sister is following. He knows that Cecethinks he shouldn’t waste his time filming other people when her own auditiontapes are more important, but Cece isn’t here right now and Pace wants to thinkabout his own possible future as a filmmaker.

He sits in the front row of the theatre seats, picking atthe tub of jellybeans that he’s placed in the cupholder of the arm rest. He’shalfway through chewing thoughtfully on a blueberry flavoured bean when Beatwirls onto the stage, tutu fanning out around her waist.

At once, he scrambles to switch on his camera as musicfilters through the auditorium, swelling in volume when it meets him just infront of the stage. The red recording light flashes on and he peers through thelens at the dancing redhead, watching as she executes twirls and leaps in thesame practised way as his sister. The two of them make it look so easily, eventhough Bea claims that dance is only a mere hobby for her. He can only believethat to be true when he sees the look on her face, as it is different from thedetermined look of concentration that Emmeline usually wears. It is differentthan the hardened facial expression of Cece who looks near murderous whenpirouetting across the stage as if each thump back on the ground is the face ofsomeone who had wronged her.

Bea is smiling.

The lens of his camera has fogged up with condensation andhe belatedly – and sheepishly – realises that it’s his breath. He’s no longerwatching Bea dance through the camera but over it so he can see her in the highdefinition that a tiny, grainy screen cannot provide.

When she finishes, she gives him a mock bow which isfollowed by a giggle and he unknowingly mimics the sound before he can stophimself.

“That was… awesome,” he decides on when he finally finds hisvoice, hoping that she’s too far away to notice the way that his cheeks havebegun to redden. She doesn’t seem to pick up on that and instead scurries backoffstage.

Turning his camera off, Pace flops against the back of theseat, twirling a green coloured jellybean between his thumb and forefinger andgiving into the sense of dread that suddenly overwhelms him when he realises avery bad, very awful thing. He is sure that he wants to kiss Bea Albright.

three.

His sense of co-ordination begins and ends with his bike. Hecan cycle through the busy streets of Paris without running over someone’s toesor ending up handlebars first in the Seine, but dancing is out of the question.He leaves pushing up onto nimble toes and spinning around with an effortlessgrace to Emmeline, who has always been the Prouvaire that held herself withmore poise than Pace can ever wish to achieve.

However, he’s unable to say ‘no’ to Bea when she says shewants to teach him how to dance, and that’s not just because he really doeswant learn how to dance to ‘King of New York’. It’s because the excited look onher face and the way she smiles at him and tugs him along by his hand makes therefusal stick in his throat, as half-hearted as it had been in the first place.

Five minutes later, he finds himself in the dance studiowith Bea having stolen his newsboy cap. He doesn’t mind. He likes the way itsits jauntily on her head, but that’s not something he should be thinking atall. He wonders what Cece would say if she knew he was here, especially whenshe’s already voiced her opinion about how much time Pace spent with Bea.Emmeline’s always on hand to reassure Pace’s girlfriend that there’s nothinggoing on, and that Pace deserves to have friends outside the two of them. Ceceonly doesn’t argue because she stops caring after a while.

The routine is easy at first and Pace is proud at howquickly he masters the act of slapping a hand off his thigh then his shoulderthen his thigh again in a rhythmic motion. His booted feet hit off the floor inwhat is supposed to be the quick steps of a tap routine but Bea goes easy onhim when he messes up, only giggling and fondly calling him hopeless.

Her words doesn’t hold much weight until he proves that hetruly is hopeless when he stumblessuddenly and crashes into the petite girl beside him. They both tumble to theground in a fit of surprised squeaks and laughter and Pace hasn’t seen The Lion King since he was a little boy,but he knows this is extremely reminiscent of that one scene with Simba andNala.

“Sorry, sorry,” he pants, attempting to get his breath backas the exertion from the dance routine catches up to him. He’s hovering aboveBea, elbows planted firmly on the ground by her face to support his weight andhe simply stares at her. She’s staring back and the moment is charged with asort of tension that Pace does not know the English word for.

His next apology dies in his throat as his eyes dart down toher lips, parted in surprise, and it would be so easy to simply close the gapbetween them, but he doesn’t. Because he has Cece and that means he taken and he’s seen what happens tocheaters back in high school. His own moral compass won’t let him lean downfurther and so he pulls away.

“Sorry,” he mumbles again, reaching a hand out to pull Beato her feet. They don’t talk about what just happened, a funny quip about Pacebeing terribly clumsy going amiss, bypassing the allotted bracket where itshould land, accompanied by what should be Bea’s teasing giggle. They’re bothsilent and flushed for a moment before Bea claps her hands and announces thatthey should ‘take it from the top’.

four.

Pace hasn’t picked up on the warning signs that have beendropped throughout the night. Instead, he accepts the beer bottles that arepressed into his hand by one of Bea’s roommates and doesn’t even realise thatLouis has finished his drink and is thumbing the rim of his bottlethoughtfully. He barely blinks when the other man calls the room to attentionand announces that he wants to play Spin the Bottle. He’s never played beforebut Louis won’t take ‘no’ for an answer. The only people who look overly putout about the idea is Wardo and Christian, so Pace takes a seat by his fellowfilm buff and shoots him a calming smile.

The crowd of teenagers in the apartment gather round in acircle as Louis takes it upon himself to spin the bottle and as soon as itlands on Sybil, he’s chasing her around the apartment and eventually settlesfor a quick peck. Sybil then has to kiss Angelica whose spins lands on Atticuswho has to kiss Melody who, by a stroke of luck, ends up with the bottle neckpointing in the direction of her boyfriend. Soon enough, she and Elliot are inthe corner making a slightly-more-than-PG display of public affection and itbecomes clear to all involved that Elliot won’t be around for his turn.

“Who was sitting next to Elliot?” Elsie asks, waving thebottle lightly.

For the first time that night, Pace feels a flicker ofapprehension and attempts to hide behind Christian, but Lydia soon sells himout with a cheeky smile. He sighs in defeat, hoping that perhaps Cece wouldvoice her disapproval, but she’s too busy making eyes at Louis. He doesn’t needto look at the other boy to know that Wardo is scowling and focuses instead onspinning the bottle with a deft flick of his wrist.

It rattles against the uneven floorboards before eventuallycoming to a halt and he simply stares at it for a few seconds before raisinghis eyes to look at who it was pointing to. Bea catches his eye across thecircle and he knows what they’re both thinking about: their awkward dancesession in the studio.

Awkwardness is quickly brushed to the side when Christiangives him a soft pat on the shoulder and the silence is broken by Angelica’s, “Nofair, Baby Bea! I wanted the cuteFrench one!”

Pace’s brown eyes are widened as Bea stares back at them andthe only people who know the true reason for his deer-caught-in-headlights lookare the redhead and Emmeline. He tells his sister anything and everything andthe incident in the dance studio had been no exception.

“You guys, Pacey has a girlfriend!” Bea attempts to reason.Pace nods dumbly as all eyes swivel to look at Cece.

“What do I care? It is a game,”she points out, looking more than miffed to have been distracted from herconversation with Louis than anything else. The rest of their company take thisas permission to egg the two on and Pace soon finds himself pushing up onto hisknees so he can lean across the circle slightly, prompted by the encouragingvoices of their friends.

He’s always wanted to kiss Bea, but not like this. This isn’tthe right setting and a game of Spin the Bottle is not romantic at all, eventhough there should be no room in their dynamic for anything that surpassesplatonic. Nevertheless, Pace wishes they were somewhere else, where he wouldn’thave to think about what he was doing, each action being overanalysed as heknew he’d have to be careful. If he kisses Bea the way he wants to kiss her, not even Cece would be willing to sweepsomething like that other the rug.

He must look panicked because teasing jibes fill the room.Bea doesn’t join in, looking just as hesitant as he does. For some reason, hethinks Violet is glaring at him. He knows it will just look more suspicious ifhe pulls away from the other girl so he leans in closer, only to jump back,startled, when a crash sounds to his left.

He glances sideways to see Emmeline squeaking and makinghurried apologies, blindly grabbing for a spare towel to mop up her spilleddrink. The game is momentarily forgotten about as Elsie and Violet make a moveto quickly help her, breaking the circle. Lydia and Callum take the opportunityto go and get another drink and Louis and Wardo seem to be distracted, lockedin their own heated argument.

He catches his sister’s eye over Violet’s shoulder and shegives him a subtle nod. I’ve got you,the look she wears on her face says and he rests back against the sofa next toChristian.

He can’t bring himself to look at Bea for the rest of thenight.

five.

He’s pleased with the finished product of all the clips he’sshot in New Zealand. Most of them are Bea and his sister and Cece doesn’t likethat, but not for the reasons she should be. She just wants to be the star,that’s all. Bea, however, says he’s done a good job and he smiles at her.

They’re sitting on the edge of the stage, legs dangling overthe side and they suddenly find themselves at a loss for what to do once Paceturns his camera off and slides it back into his backpack. There never used tobe awkward silences between the two of them but he supposes that’s changed nowafter every single ‘almost’ that they’ve had during his stay in Wellington.

“When’s your flight?” she asks him quietly, her wordsprompting the familiar feeling of dread that resurfaces any time he thinksabout his departure.

“Tomorrow morning,” he replies, his voice equally as subduedand they lapse into silence again, neither of them sure what to say.

They both know there’s something there but won’t voice itbecause they both also know that it’s wrong. There’s nothing right about theway their hands brush or the way they lock eyes when no one else is lookingbecause Pace is still in a relationship that he can’t break away from, becausethat would mean his sister won’t achieve her dreams, and there’s nothing in theworld that’s more important than her – definitely not Pace’s selfishness.

“I should actually be on my way back to the apartment topack,” he says, because it’s what he has to say.

Soon enough they’re hugging, holding onto each other tightlybecause this is the last chance they’ll get. He’s promised to text and Skypebut he knows that it won’t be enough and he won’t be dramatic and leave herwith the promise of ‘one day’, one day when he and Emmeline don’t need to relyon Cece’s money to see them through to success.

They’re clinging onto each other and he knows that he shouldpull away but when he does, he’s not far away. His hands still rest on herwaist and he’s staring at her, the tips of their noses brushing lightlytogether. The small movement makes his breath hitch in his throat and he wantsto lean in, close the distance and just do what he has been yearning to do forweeks, even months.

“Pacey.”

“Bea.”

Neither of them move, except for when Pace’s hand comes upto brush away a stray lock of hair from Bea’s face. He tucks it securely behindher ear and tilts his head forward but it’s their foreheads that press togetherrather than their lips. They don’t kiss because Pace likes to think he’s betterthan that, but the phrase ‘emotional cheating’ springs to mind.

+ one.

As soon as he walks into the arrival lounge, the flowers hegrasps are nearly knocked right out of his hand as Bea jumps at him. He letsout a happy laugh and wraps his arms around her tiny frame, picking her up so herfeet dangle just below his shins. The sound of her laughter mingles with hisown and a few minutes pass before he sets her back down, presenting her withthe flowers he’d picked up in Auckland before his connecting flight.

She takes them and rolls her eyes at the old fashioneddisplay of chivalry and nothing but fondness swells in his chest at the freshfaced sight of her after so long. He shoulders his backpack and gives a wave toLouis and Wardo behind her. Only Wardo returns the gesture whilst Louis looksbored and like he would rather be anywhereelse.

“So we should go?” he guesses, anxious to also see Haydenback at Messina. He’s missed his cousin a lot.

Bea pauses then makes a show of looking past his shoulder asif she is expecting a certain high heeled brunette to march after him throughthe automatic doors. Pace simply smiles in a coy manner and waits for her toask.

“Do you have any baggage with you?” comes her innocentquestion.

Pace knows better than to take her words literally. He’sgrown accustomed to those funny English colloquialisms over the past few monthsand realises that she is referring to something else that is not baggage.

“No. I have everything I need,” he smiles, practicallybeaming when a grin of Bea’s own breaks out onto her face. He offers her hishand and she takes it, lacing their fingers together in a way that makes Pace’sheart leap giddily in his chest. He squeezes her hand lightly and they beginwalking, but soon enough Pace grows impatient.

Bea’s walking a little bit in front of him and he gives herhand a quick tug, making her spin back around to face him so he can lean downand kiss her, softly pressing his lips to hers and pushing his free hand intoher hair. An airport may be romantic for some, especially people who have seen Love, Actually but Pace knows that itisn’t the most ideal of locations for a first kiss. He can’t wait any longerthough and when Bea responds by winding her arms around his neck, he findshimself smiling against her mouth, knowing that he was right to wait as everysecond leading up to this one has been worth it.