Private Thoughts (7/?)
Warnings/Notes: An Ace/Aro trying to figure out how to write attraction so it’s a little weird, I apologize. Nonsexual watching of a human, mentions of a cat on nip, failed hand-holding, brief mentions of bait/traps, denial of feelings.
If I’m missing something tell me
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Jackie had stuck to his word. There was a little more variety in the foods that Michael had found in the containers and there were even sweets and delicious perishable items. It wasn’t uncommon for Jackie to find Michael sitting propped up against the container, nibbling on food at various times of the day and night.
At least Michael’s ribs were finally no longer a hindrance, and he was feeling a lot better. Without the worry of food, he found himself watching the human a lot more. Just watching.
Watching him do his homework and projects, sprawled out on the couch. Earbuds in, tapping out a beat either with his foot or with his fingers against the edge of the page, mumbling the lyrics or belting it out with a bobbing head.
Cooking in the kitchen. He'd have the radio going, much softer than he normally did when before Michael told him to turn it down a little because he was loud for his little ears. He swayed his hips as he worked, humming along or occasionally singing half of the lyrics.
Though, it was a personal favorite of Michael to watch him doing a light workout every other day. His muscles were on full display, intimidating and massive, but also really, really appealing. It was quite nice to watch from a distance where he wasn’t afraid of their power.
He also tried to do something nice in return for the food he was putting out. There was just something about taking handouts without trying to pay for them didn't sit right with him. A few times Jackie would lose his pen or pencil and Michael would tell when where it was or drag it out for him.
Also, Jackie would talk to him about something if he was stuck on a project. Michael couldn't understand most of what he was talking about, but he was willing to listen. He felt like it was helping the big human.
And he may or may not have been starting to really enjoy just sitting with him and watching him talk, even talking back on occasion. It made him feel good to sit and watch the human. Jackie was actually a really nice guy.
And it was a bit of a bonus his heart would flutter every time he saw him flex.
---
Jackie was making dinner for both of them. Frozen pizza cooked in the very finicky oven. He'd made it his goal to introduce the scrawny little guy to a wider variety of food.
Though, he stopped looking so sickly after a few weeks. More solid, a lot less like a deep breath would knock him over. The poor guy was so small.
Michael had seemed to be a little more confident now in being out with him now. He would be sitting on the table or counter and he would be actually talking back to him. He'd yet to really touch or hold him often, but it was something at least. To just talk.
He was actually kind of funny. Good puns. He was a good listener. He would sit on the edge of a textbook and listen to Jackie vent about school.
Michael would talk back sometimes, just like funny things he'd seen or heard in the walls. Jokes. Gossip on the neighbors. Apparently, the neighbors across the hall are very messy in the kitchen, and the place is a mess most of the time.
It was one of those times while Michael was sitting on the counter, not too far away from where Jackie was leaning on the counter. Jackie was keeping a close eye on the timer he'd set, wary of letting the pizza burn and having it tear up his mouth.
"And the cat, she was on nip, right?" Michael was struggling to hold back laughter while he spoke. "A-and Ash was against the wall, and it was so scary at the time, but i - it's funny now, but she was purring like he was her kitten. We thought he was a goner for sure!"
"Must have been scary."
"It was, but like, ever since she's been getting nip pretty much every weekend, it's a breeze to scavenge there now. Still can't get caught by her though. It's hard to make her let go."
Jackie chuckled quietly and checked the timer, letting his hand absently rest on the counter near where Michal was sitting.
He still had a few minutes, and he was glancing into the oven. It still needed a few more minutes. His mind was wandering. Maybe he should tell him about his little cousin and his circle of friends that Jackie had half adopted. Tell him what about them, though? They had used to set baited traps to trap Little Bits when they were kids?
Just as Jackie was settling on the fact that they were pretty much the entire basketball team, with the exception of himself as one of the defensive linemen, he felt something touch the hand he had resting on the counter.
Glancing down, he saw Michael touching the base of his thumb. It felt like he had an ice chip on his hand. Slowly, Michael's gaze wandered up his arm and when he saw Jackie looking, he gasped and quickly withdrew.
"You okay? You're ice cold." He flipped his hand over so it was palm up. "I don't mind."
Very, very hesitantly, Michael stepped into his hand. Jackie could hardly feel his slight weight as he settled in the middle of his palm. He gave a little smile and then he lifted his hand up and he held him to his chest.
---
Michael's heart was surely going to burst out of his chest. He could feel it.
He'd gone to try and maybe hold his hand, only to be startled away from touching his warm skin by a look. Dear lord, he was hopeless.
Jackie had then done the unimaginable. He had offered to hold Michael. It had taken a lot of bravado, but he did manage to work up the courage to walk up and sit in the middle of his palm. And then, oh man, then Jackie held him to his chest.
His heart was pounding and he felt very, very warm despite the chill in the air.
He could blame the warmth on Jackie. He was pressed to his blue shirt, face buried in the cloth, and it was like being held by a space heater. He had two fistfuls of the thick, blue cloth and he was afraid to
look up. He just didn't want to look up and see that smile that always made him weak at the knees and then have his heart give out from pounding so hard.
Under all this thick, hard muscle were much softer muscles that kept such an enormous human alive. He could hear Jackie's much calmer heart thumping away inside his chest, a stark contrast to the humming-bird like rhythm Michael's heart was going at. He tried to slow his breathing, but he'd like to see someone else try being smushed to the chest of a really attractive giant when they are so, so gay.
He very slowly peeled his face out of the cloth and glanced up. Jackie wasn't even looking, thank goodness.
Michael just buried his face in Jackie's chest again, and he sighed. It was nice being held.
---
Jackie had forgotten what he had been doing when suddenly the timer shrieked. He'd been lost in the idea of holding a small life in his hands.
He fumbled to shut it up one-handedly and he glanced down at Michael, who was staring up at him. "Uh, I need my hands."
"Oh, right." Michael let go of his shirt.
Jackie set him on the counter and grabbed the tray and the pizza cutter.
Why was he blushing?
He shouldn't be blushing.
That was just a little hug. It was to warm him up. There wasn't much other meaning behind it.
Don't look too into it, Jack, you’ll just confuse yourself.














