implied sex, spoilers for the sabaody arc, gender-neutral reader x mihawk (pre-relationship then established), pastel goth family shenanigans
if you liked reading this, thank @sordidmusings she motivated me to look through my files and, lo and behold, i remembered this existed.
zoro would be oblivious to the romantic tension between you and mihawk because he just doesn't care. all he'd pick up on is that there's a bond between you two. mihawk treats you differently in some vague way zoro can't put into words.
so he firmly categorizes you two as friends, missing the blatant signs even after the two of you start dating. bro would wonder why some of the rooms smell a bit weird after coming back from a forced shopping trip with perona. he'd find torn bits of clothing and thinks a fight took place (did the humandrills somehow get inside?).
zoro would unknowingly cockblock the two of you the whole time then wonder why mihawk seems strangely pissed during training. he gets stabbed and wonders why it feels so personal this time.
it finally clicks together that you and mihawk are romantically involved when he walks in on you and mihawk kissing. he's never slammed a door closed faster in his life. now he can't unsee all the small signs.
seeing affectionate couples in public has never made him feel anything before but for some reason seeing you and mihawk like that makes him feel awkward. he has to look away and pretends nothing's happening when mihawk does something as simple as kissing your hand or softly smiling at you. perona bullies him for it, calling him a toddler.
perona, on the other hand, immediately clocks the romantic tension and, to your face, bluntly questions your taste in men.
she thinks it's stupid how neither of you have confessed to each other and expects mihawk to fumble you with how much of a hardass he is. the imminent heartbreak and drama would be fun to watch, she thinks. but then she gets attached. seeing either of you sad is kind of upsetting actually.
wanting to see you happy, she takes zoro out on shopping trips. he gets to be her packing mule, perona gets to buy all cute things she wants, and you two get some alone time! it's a win-win!
she kinda starts to regret it though when she picks up signs of your active sex life. if there's brain bleach she'd like 20 liters, thanks. she's very vocal about better clean-ups but has no retort when mihawk dryly replies perona didn't even give a heads up for when they'd be back. perona becomes very diligent about this.
for all her complaining, she's genuinely happy for you guys. and a small part of her might be internally going "awwww" at how sweet you are to each other.
inspired by this mihawk’s section in this jealousy headcanon post by @sordidmusings. if you want mihawk being jealous in a pre-relationship scenario, then i recommend reading it!
pre-relationship, i feel like mihawk would get easily jealous and be far more petty but once there’s an established relationship, he’d be much more relaxed and secure.
if someone he considers far beneath you tries to flirt with you (ex: lying cowards, scammers, serial cheater, etc), he’s not jealous so much as protective and genuinely offended on your behalf. how dare that person think to take advantage of you. (rest in piss to buggy if he ever flirted with you)
but if the person is sincere, caring, and compatible with you, warm and friendly in all the ways mihawk isn’t, he’d feel threatened and get jealous. getting him to admit that he’s jealous would be like pulling teeth despite it being blatantly obvious to you that he is. he’d insist he doesn’t like that person because of some character flaw or quirk they have. it’s not because he’s jealous.
it’s a combination of trust issues, wondering if he’s enough, and guilt for doubting you. it’s stuff he wouldn’t admit even under pain of death.
but he does anyway. because it’s you, and only you.
and it helps him far more than he’d like to admit when you insist that you don’t want anyone else that it’s him, and only him. it surprises him how much more bearable his jealousy becomes. he once thought talking about feelings was a futile endeavor. he didn’t think he’d experience the warmth and love in it ever again.
i have conflicting opinions on how easily mihawk would get jealous in an established relationship.
on one hand, it makes sense for him to not give a shit because he's just that confident in himself and that no one else can compare.
on the other hand, it also makes sense that he'd get easily annoyed and jealous if someone tried to hit on his s/o because he simply does not like people or trust them.
now that i think about it both things can be true to an extent 🤔
i headcanon that mihawk's eyes slightly glow in the dark and has decent night vision. if the moon's out at night, he considers that well-lit enough and doesn't bother turning on any lights since he's memorized the layout of all the rooms in his castle. he gave zoro heart attacks several times when he saw a dark figure with glowing eyes wandering in the kitchen and the wine cellar.
thinking about these youtube livebloggers who were watching opla and when mihawk showed up and sliced a boat in half one of them went "is he single? 👀"
