Entry 19: The One Where I Perform Mis-Directed as a Three Act Comedy, Act I
The main characters star in a television series adapted from bestselling romance novels…
…called Leicester Square.
Hattie Murton plays Iris Pinkerton, “[a] living ghost of a person, so unimportant that she could walk amongst them tonight… She was simply beneath their notice, which made her to all intents and purposes invisible. It was terribly convenient.”
“Anthony [Rafe] was six feet tall and had a swimmer’s build. All lean elegant muscle.”
Anthony plays bad boy, Victor Del Vayo [sp], whose signature look includes – don’t say “pirate coat!” – no, a long cape.
Anthony also has a crazed fan...
"She’d turned up uninvited at his old flat a week later and bribed the security guard to let her in. He’d made it extremely clear to both of them that if the occurrence was repeated, they’d each be departing in a police car or a body bag."
Oh, and there’s a character named “Jake,” whose sexual chemistry with Hattie is described as “sparks in a damp firework,” a point that is driven into the reader repeatedly. The Jakolas “would have probably preferred it if this was a euphemism.” Alas, it is not.
Actual sparks fly between Hattie and Anthony during their scripted love scenes – although, based on the text, they are both drawn to each other before the filming of their season even starts.
“The fans have got you to where you are. We’ve been listening to what the audience is asking.”
“Lady Iris was getting a proper romance arc. Not just a series of mad sexual exploits and single episode infatuations with passing guest stars. A full on – and sweet Christ – a long-running affair beginning with a surprise kiss scene on Monday. Iris was about to fall madly and reluctantly in love with Victor Del Vayo.”
Oh, and did I mention Anthony had “grown up in Mayfair?”
Let’s not forget Anthony is also a writer…
And that Hattie’s loves some “[g]ood ol’ Irish tradition…” because her dad is from Galway.
Then there's this: “’The very sweet Sergeant Llewellyn,’ [Hattie] reminisced. ‘My personal favorite of Iris’s lovers…’”
And, of course, every single mention of Pride and Prejudice...
“[Hattie had] accidently seen [Anthony] in a production of Julius Caesar at The Old Vic last year during their summer break…He’d been arresting, engrossing, heart wrenching.”
Anthony’s character, Victor, wears a signet ring: “The ring was heavy silver. A human skull in profile with a ruby eye that could be spun in its socket.”
Okay, enough about the main characters.
Let's move on to those intimacy scenes…
“Everything felt off today.”
“If Stevie had thought they’d been lacking chemistry in round one, perhaps she’d decided to gift them with a bonding experience. A shared case of fake snogging and induced lockjaw.”
“And now suddenly… you’re touching for the first time in all these years. Lo and behold, caught off guard by the explosion of chemistry.”
“A nerve twitched under Anthony’s firm mouth. He’d well and truly lost the air of bored idleness now and when he put his hands on Hattie’s corseted waist and slammed his body up against hers, pressing her into the wall, there was nothing disjointed and indolent about the maneuver or the way her breath left her in a rush. The actual mechanics behind the lift and spin were controlled and almost shockingly gentle. He concealed one palm behind her back and took the full force of the collision with his own body."
“Hattie found herself treating that drop of perspiration as an almost spotting point, like a ballet dancer keeping their balance during a fouette.”
“A muscle in her neck was starting to cramp, as they paused there artfully for the cameras. She adjusted arching her back in an unscripted gesture that pressed their bodies closer. As her belly rubbed up over his and his sheltering arms flexed, a coiling full-bodied zing shivered through her like the subtlest flooding of spice and warmth and then a jolt of pure fizzing adrenaline… As Hattie watched, still oddly transfixed, his pupils dilated, just a bit."
“For once, or maybe the first time ever, [Hattie] wasn’t excruciatingly conscious of everyone’s watching eye. She felt frozen, distant from the surrounding scene yet conversely hyper aware of every angle and shiver and prickle of her own body…"
“The hallway, the cameras, the rest of the world, it all ceased to exist. Seconds were slipping into minutes.”











