I would like you to know that I once got attacked by like 5 or 6 bears at once ( I‘m not kidding it was a nightmare) in the Hinterlands and everyone kept dying and I couldnt fucking run away. I don‘t even remember how I got out of there. Bear trauma.
THE BEAR TRAUMA IS REAL
honestly can’t count how many times I just fuckin
finished like the second or third bear and cassandra TOOK OFF to fight another one. cole was flickering in and out of existence already. dorian was crying on the ground. even my butch qunari was feeling a little sore. but not cassandra allegra portia calogera filomena pentaghast. IF IT’S A BEAR, IT DIES.
I'm very happy you are feeling like writing again. Your work is amazing ❤ So I was thinking for a short prompt what about: The company is worried Bilbo won't be very well accepted by the kingdom, but to their surprise that's not the case. Furthermore, the whole mountain is absolutely convinced that Bilbo and Thorin are an item. After listening to the rumours, Bilbo and Thorin realize that they wouldn't mind if it was all true.
I decided to combine this with another prompt that was sent in, because I felt they went well together and also I thought together they were a great premise for a ficlet. It may have gotten a bit away from me.
Combined with @mizimeluh‘s prompt: “bilbo and thorin accidentally married by the law of dwarves after the battle“
The thing about dwarves was that they were secretive about everything. It didn’t annoy Bilbo very much at first, not after he had come to understand them better. Of course, if he had lost his own homeland multiple times, and supposed allies had turned their backs on his people, he wouldn’t be quick to trust strangers either. All in all, Bilbo couldn’t find it in himself to be upset that the dwarves had their own language kept to themselves.
He might have wished to learn it but the simple fact remained: he wouldn’t be able to.
There was a myriad of other things that the dwarves kept secret. Bilbo couldn’t keep a count straight in his head, and he really didn’t need to.
But he did wish that their traditions and culture wasn’t drenched as deeply as it was in secrecy. That probably would have kept him from the mess he found himself in now.
Where to begin on that…
The aftermath of the Battle left most of the armies in shambles. As the few remaining orcs and goblins skittered away, they were left to regain their bearings. Bilbo found himself trying to fight Oin off and locate Thorin again. He hadn’t really been doing well, considering the hole in his chest and everything.
“Leave me be!” Bilbo hissed unhappily, batting away Oin’s hand. “I only hit my head, there’s more pressing matters to attend to.”
“Aye, like Thorin?”
“Yes, Thorin!” Bilbo managed to stand. Thankfully, Oin didn’t try to stop him, but the old dwarf gave him a measured look.
“Thorin is as taken care of as he’s goin to be, laddie. What we don’t need is you suffering worse because you wouldn’t sit your fool head down.”
Not that any of that mattered much. The sound of the tent’s flap being pushed to the side brought Bibo’s attention away from Oin and to the dwarf peering into the healing tent. At Bilbo’s change in attention, Oin turned to see who the intruder was. As always, he remained guarded until he had assessed that the dwarf intruding into the tent wasn’t a danger.
“Dain,” he said, grunting as he turned back to trying to bandage Bilbo’s forehead. “What is it?”
“Ack, Thorin’s drivin’ everyone insane, is the halfling alright to be moved over there?”
Bilbo bristled, but he didn’t have time to take insult as being called a halfling. He caught onto the words Dain had spoken before that.
“Thorin? He’s awake?”
“Not for long,” Dain crossed his arms, “he’s in and out of it more often than not. Keeps looking for his halfling though, and we think he’d be better rested if he at least saw ‘im.”
Oin grumbled, throwing up his hands before pushing Bilbo gently towards Dain. “Keep an eye on both of ‘em, my lord. He can go, but only to see Thorin. Don’t let him run off.”
“I told you--”
“Aye, aye, you want to see Thorin. Stay with Thorin until we figure out better arrangements.” Oin muttered, waving his hand at them to leave the healing tent.
Bilbo followed on Dain’s heels. When the dwarf’s hand came to usher him in front of Dain, Bilbo startled slightly. He glanced questioningly back at the dwarf lord but Dain said nothing. The only response Bilbo received was Dain urging him towards the tent that Thorin rested in.
Slowly, Bilbo began to take in the looks he was receiving from the dwarf soldiers littered among their temporary camp. They were mixed, certainly, which made Bilbo unsure of what was going on and why he was receiving them.
The entrance into Thorin’s tent was guarded, but Bilbo didn’t recognize either of the guards. They gave him no mind. Inside, Dwalin stood by Thorin’s bedside. He looked up, the relief washing onto his face a surprise to Bilbo. Had it really been that bad?
“Should stop his whining,” Dain said cheerfully. “Get the lad a chair, won’t you?”
One of the dwarves that Bilbo didn’t recognize rushed to bring him a chair. Dwalin settled a hand on the top of Bilbo’s head and frowned.
“You’ve got a lot of explainin’ to do, Bilbo. When the time’s right.” Dwalin chucked him gently. “If you’d stayed with me, you wouldn’t be dealin’ with this headache, eh?”
“And I wouldn’t have found Thorin in time,” Bilbo countered. They looked at each other for a moment before Dwalin broke into a grin. Bilbo mirrored it before he looked towards Thorin.
It wasn’t difficult to look at Thorin like this, but it felt wrong somehow. The last time Bilbo had seen him, he’d been bloodied and pale, bruised, barely alive, in the midst of a terrible battlefield. In here, he had been bandaged and washed, though he was still pale.
From blood loss, Bilbo thought worriedly.
Tentatively, he reached out to take hold of the King’s hand. It was colder than it should be, he thought, but it wasn’t ice cold. Bilbo could see the rise and fall of Thorin’s chest, slow as it was. He was blessedly alive.
Bilbo could content himself with that.
He wasn’t sure what had happened, that he’d fallen asleep, until the sound of voices woke him. It was a disorienting moment, where Bilbo feared the last memories he had were a dream and not the reality.
But there was a hand in his hair, a gentle touch to it, and he could hear a steady heart beat. The voices came in after that, light as they were, Bilbo’s keen ears picked them up. He had a feeling he wasn’t supposed to be hearing the conversation but it was rather difficult to not eavesdrop on it.
“What does Nori report?” Thorin. His voice was rough, quiet, from disuse, Bilbo thought.
“Nothing to worry about,” Dwalin’s gruff voice. “The Iron Hills dwarves are... very receptive. More than we though they’d be, which is good.”
“What do you mean?”
“Nori said there’s rumors going around ‘bout the marriage, but all of it is positive. Thought we’d be gettin’ more backlash but you don’t need to worry about it at all. I don’t think anyone will come after ‘im, and if they do...”
Marriage... marriage? Marriage?!
Bilbo shot up. The top of his head collided with something hard. He found himself staring dazedly at Thorin, who rubbed at his chin with a small grimace on his mouth.
“Marriage?” Bilbo shrieked.
“Peace,” Thorin said, reaching out a hand to check Bilbo’s head. Bilbo pushed him away with a soft huff before he turned to stare at Dwalin.
“Marriage? What are you talking about?”
Dwalin’s eyes flicked between Thorin and Bilbo before settling back on Bilbo. At least he was a straightforward dwarf.
“You don’t know.” He said it slowly, as though he was also processing the fact. “Course you don’t. Why would you.”
He glared at Thorin, which resulted in Bilbo turning to stare at Thorin accusingly.
“Nothing was done,” Thorin said sharply. “They are rumors, but we’re hardly--”
“By law you are.” Dain’s voice sounded from the corner of the tent. Bilbo whipped his head to stare at the dwarf lord. He had missed his presence, but then... he hadn’t said anything until now. “Rumors or not, from my understandin’, you gave him mithril, cousin. He accepted it, aye?”
“Aye,” Thorin said it slowly. His eyes were darting about, refusing to settle directly onto Bilbo. “That’s neither here nor there, it’s barely a proposal.”
“Witnessed in front of your kin,” Dwalin added. “It was one.”
“Well now, hold on,” Bilbo said, “marriage by law, you’re saying... but we didn’t--”
“Dwarven law has different requirements for this kind of thing,” Dain interrupted. “Thorin offered a gift of high value to you, in front his closest kin and friends. You accepted it in turn. It’s my understandin’ that you saved him from certain death during the battle.”
“Yes, but I... surely that cannot be...”
“It is,” Thorin said quietly. “Though it is a tradition highly out of practice.”
“Aye,” Dain nodded in agreement, “but not out of law. Rumors are flyin’. You did ask for him on what was supposed to be your deathbed.”
Thorin pressed a hand to his face in frustration while Bilbo leaned back. He was having a hard time processing this all. They were married, for one thing, and while Bilbo didn’t necessarily have an issue with that, he did have a problem with.. well, he was’t sure what. But he thought he should probably have issue with something about this.
Dwarves!
That was it.
Their secrecy could be infuriating.
“It’s not bad,” Thorin said after a moment. He was looking at Bilbo again. “It is good to know that my people are accepting of you. I admit I was worried... if you were to stay, if you wanted to stay, what they would think. After everything. I see now that I have no reason to worry, as you are--”
Bilbo didn’t let Thorin finish. He knew that the dwarf could go on for ages if they let him. Besides, he was fairly sure that Thorin wouldn’t protest the kiss very much at all.
wouldn‘t it be a worse punishment to wrap you in a blanket and make you a warm drink and feed you pancakes or something then instead of beating you up bc that‘s what you want
good point! but, honestly that scenario would just make me fall in love with you a bit faster akjshdjs it’s like do you want a slowburn enemies to lovers scenario or a cute i-take-care-of-you friends to lovers fluffy scenario… mutuals can vote now!! lmao
Can we agree that Link is a slutty, needy power bottom?
I think Link simply is aware of what he wants out of sex and is more than willing to take the steps necessary to ensure his partner is aware of this. I believe Link is also versatile and has been shown in all the games to be willing and able to use random items to assist him in his quest. Sometimes words are necessary, but he has proven again and again his preference of action over speech.
In the games where Link is even aware of what sex is and doesn’t think it’s some kind of fruit or something, anyway. Or just another weird thing adults do, perfectly distracting them in the time period it takes Link to break all their pots and examine everything in their homes.
- Acorn scene: Pinnacle of ‘heart eyes’, potentially a good starting point for a lot of AUs/What if etcc, excellent acting, overall I’m still not over it… BUT it kind of implies Bilbo is going back to the Shire, unless he was expecting Thorin to say something like “well excuse me Erebor has an excellet weather when it’s not frozen you could plant it here ahah please stay thanks”.
- Mithril scene: Symbolism!!, excellent soundtrack (the first 40 seconds are romantic af), canon scene made gayer which is nice, again excellent acting, the whole “the gold is ours and ours alone” plus Thorin’s weird kind-of-orgasm face?? And it’s technically a canon scene?
Dwalin goes into instant teary eyes mode every time he holds Frodo. Every. Time. Tells his guards they better fucking die protecting Frodo bc they will wish they are dead if he gets hurt.
OH YES Dwalin is absolutely over-protective of Frodo and no one would dare cross his path when it comes to Frodo.
ALL OF YOU ARE VALID josephine goes so well with any inquisitor and I absolutely adore my qunari towering over her and I can’t wait for halamshiral hhhHHHHH what a good romance
The only bad thing about the Witcher netflix show? Geralt being mean to Jaskier in the last episode 😔 I stan a dumbass bard ✊🏻
OHHH I KNOW!! honestly, i am really looking forward to their friendship in the next season, like i really love their dynamic so much 😔 i understand geralt being a perpetual loner who doesn’t really know how to deal with having someone so outgoing as jaskier follow him around, but he obviously cares for him so much and oof i hated how the last ep ended between them... i mean mending that will be something i can look forward to in season 2 i guess!!
