It had taken quite a bit of courage to say exactly what she’d been harboring all this time (and perhaps a few shots of liquid courage, just in case). Molly knew this was an uncomfortable subject, for more than one reason, but they couldn’t avoid it forever. It was best to address the elephant in the room to move on…for them. For Bod.
She simply hadn’t expected such a slap in the face. Certainly, she and Silas were more different than they were alike. They held their mutual love of history, and of Bod, but…that was where the similarities ended. Silas deserved someone more refined and educated. What sort of image would it make for him to associate with someone who’s best date had been in a dive bar? Of course it wasn’t a good idea…she wasn’t a good idea.
“Yeah, well, I just wanted to say my piece…” Molly brushed at imaginary lint on her jeans, attempting to find anything else to distract herself with as her eyes welled. Like hell she’d let him see her that way. “And I have. So. That’s a load off our chests, huh? Let’s just…forget it. Forget it.”
The moment she had started repeating him, he knew he messed up big somewhere. His words were suddenly misconstrued and his own heart began to race a little with anxiety. His intention wasn’t to hurt her. There was no telling if they felt exactly the same for each other, since everyone was different and Silas's emotions were like a day after a tornado; quiet in the aftermath of a wreckage.
He didn’t want her to go. He didn’t want her to walk out, he didn’t want her to be angry. Swallowing hard, he folded his own hands together in fear of reaching out for her only to be rejected.
“There are still a lot of things wrong with me,
alright? I do trust you, I enjoy having you around.
My son is overjoyed to be your friend. But there
are still some fears I haven’t overcome yet.”
It seemed like a stupid, typical excuse in his mind, but it was the only honest one he could give her, and he could feel his chest sink a little. He couldn’t bear it if she thought he was being irrational.
