The Echoes of Us
Every day, when I wake up in the morning, I catch myself looking for you.
For the “good mornings” we used to share, always followed by a kiss. For the warmth of your body every time we held each other close.
Sometimes, when I scroll through my phone, I unconsciously search for your name in my messages, just to send you a funny video I found on Instagram or TikTok. But then I stop myself, remembering there is no longer a “you and me.”
I never forget you. You were part of my everyday life.. from the moment I opened my eyes to the second I fell asleep.
You keep running through my mind, like a rat endlessly spinning on a wheel.
And I ask myself, don’t you ever get tired of running inside this sad mind of mine? Do you ever need to rest? Do you ever need water?
Every day feels so heavy. Every day feels so empty.
Sometimes, I drift into daydreams.
I imagine that we both miss each other, and somehow, we find our way back.
I imagine you hugging me from behind, whispering, “I’m sorry it took so long… but I’m here now.”
It hurts, you know.
It hurts knowing that all of it exists only in my imagination. That I keep creating a version of us where everything turned out okay.
And it hurts even more when I return to reality, and realize that you only loved me inside my head.