Dear Leafs, Why?
When I first heard about these trades, my first thought was to sit in the back seat of my car where it’s pitch black and yell obscenities at my phone because I find that’s how people in my industry deal with things that upset them.
However, I realized this can’t ruin my day. Do you know what I lived through as a fan of this ridiculous team?
From when we hired an unqualified hack as a general manager to overlook Teemu Selanne and Jeremy Roenick to pick a guy who scored five goals in three seasons, to the time we drafted a goalie named Peter Ing who every time anyone shot the puck at his feet, he jumped.
Should I mention when I was in a car with my dad, and the radio announcer said the Leafs “traded” Russ Courtnall to the Canadiens for John Kordic, my dad almost crashed the car with me in it (I believe the Ontario statute of limitations has run out, so I can reference that now)?
Now I get to see the gif-worthy shot of good old Kyle Dubas on two phones playing on my television. What else can go wrong?