#mrangst

[queermil]

millie’s long list of malex fics | i can make your body echo (like we're in an empty room) / fic has been orphaned​

He’s still wearing turtlenecks at his high school graduation.

A character study of Alex Manes with regards to his relationship with his body and his sexual partners (and Michael specifically).

comment: there is so much beautiful language in this fic and it just bowls me over every time i reread it. it touches on some issues that alex has with sex, and how michael is a safe space for him. it’s about how much they want each other always. it’s so good. i feel something different every time i read it. remember to check those tags before you read!!

have a fic you’d like to see on the list? let me know!

[queermil]

millie’s long list of malex fics | leave the light on by sabrinachill / @sabrinachill​

“Explain it to me again — why do we need to pretend to be married?”

It’s a question Michael knew was coming, but not one he has a good answer for. Not yet. Maybe not ever.

He cuts his eyes away from the road to steal a glance at the passenger’s seat for the seventeenth time in the past hour; the view is the same as always. Alex, frowning so deeply his entire face is drooping downward, his dark hair dancing in the wind that whips through the windows as he stares at the simple silver band circling his ring finger.

Its twin sits on Michael’s hand.

A Malex Fake Marriage fic.

comment: the absolute joy that this fic brought me (and others) during may/june cannot be accurately described. i eagerly awaited an update every day and mattie never disappointed. now that i can read over the whole thing, it’s only gotten better. the ramp up of tension, the action of the second half, it involves a list of amazing tropes, the main of course being fake marriage. god, it’s just so good. but don’t take my word for it! get over there and read it!

have a fic you’d like to see on the list? let me know!

[queermil]

millie’s long list of malex fics | mountains (since we met) by delgay ​

“Do you believe in soulmates?” Max asked once.

a “mishmash of scenes” from michael’s perspective up to 1x03.

comment: this is kind of an exploration of 101 - 103, from michael’s perspective. it’s about how much they feel for each other, no matter how much time has passed. it’s just beautifully written and i wanted to share it with y’all!

have a fic you’d like to see on the list? let me know!

[queermil]

millie’s long list of malex fics |  Alienated by mansikka / @mansikkaomenabanaani

His head is pounding. His tongue feels both dry and like the final resting place for something rotten, which it might be, judging by the taste in his mouth. Michael rolls his neck, forehead pressing into the wafer-thin pillow provided in his cell. Are there normally pillows? He can't remember. Michael can't even think clearly enough to remember what happened last night. He knows alcohol was had, and maybe a little acetone in between. There was a lot of physical activity judging by the way his entire body aches. When Michael sits up to investigate the split knuckles and ache suggesting a bruise forming on his jaw, it speaks of brawling instead of fucking. That kind of night then. Could be worse.

After Caulfield and Max's death, Michael hits rock bottom and then just keeps on digging. Alone in the world, how the hell can he dig himself back out? In which, Michael Guerin learns to trust; other people and himself.

comment: this is a “michael is a total mess post-season one” fic. it’s a malex fic but at its heart, it’s a michael fic. i honestly just like fics where michael pulls himself together for himself, where he realises he has friends and doesn’t have to push people away. the malex is a wonderful bonus! the flirting is very sweet and it never feels as though one of them is earning the other; they’re just working on their own stuff separately and working their way back to each other. mansikka always writes heartwarming malex, plus there’s a (pre season two) buffy cameo!!

have a fic you’d like to see on the list? let me know!

[queermil]

millie’s long list of malex fics | Vague Space by aewriting / @aewriting

“No.”

“Mike, come on.”

“The answer’s no. Absolutely not.”

Noah looks at him skeptically. “You know how much we could make on just one run?”

Stranded on the backwater planet of Quelnin, mechanic Michael Guerin finds himself drawn into a complex species trafficking web at the insistence of his brother-in-law and boss, Noah. When he recognizes one of the beings for sale as his former lover, Alex Manes, the situation gets considerably more complicated... and dangerous.

comment: everyone’s reading this au already, right? right. good. and it is good. so good. i was yearning for some more sci-fi content about our favourite aliens and @aewriting delivered tenfold. as always, their fic deals with some heavier themes, but they slot perfectly into the scifi setting and the overall tone of the story. i don’t want to spoil anything, so check the tags before getting into it, and enjoy!

have a fic you’d like to see on the list? let me know!

[queermil]

millie’s long list of malex fics | The Red Name by BeStillMySlashyHeart / @bestillmyslashyheart

Maria blinked and stared at him incredulously. “What’s wrong?” She pulled the sheet up to her neck as she sat up. “Did you think I wouldn’t be a little concerned about this?”

Michael looked around himself. “Concerned about what? What’s wrong?”

She laughed breathlessly. “You get your ex’s name tattooed on your chest and you’re honestly asking me what’s wrong?”

According to the Project Shepherd files, when an alien reaches the age of maturity (approximated to be 30 years old), a name appears on the skin over their heart. This name will reveal the person they love most in the world. The name appears in colored ink, in shades of pink or red. The darker the color, the stronger the love. Max, Isobel, and Michael received their marks 22 years after waking up in the pods. It's a damn shame none of them are actually with the people whose name they get.

comment: marlo is the queen of soulmate fics and this one... whew! this one. i remember waiting anxiously as it updated (so quickly! it was crazy) because it was so juicy right from the get go. it’s heavily malex but the way that it swaps between POVs to update the movements of the other pairings is SO INTERESTING. i especially love the interactions shown through the emails; sometimes it’s about the stuff you have to imagine in your mind. the point is, i was hooked the whole way through. remember to check out the tags, and despite the initial angsty chapters, look forward to a wonderfully fluffy ending!!

have a fic you’d like to see on the list? let me know!

[queermil]

millie’s long list of malex fics | chum, and throw me overboard by thepredatorywasp / @usbournejez

Alex has sympathy for them, his captors. He doesn’t have to condone their actions to understand their desperation. They are desperate, that much has been made clear. He has only an opaque sense of what they are truly after, but they clearly aren’t snatching people up for the fun of it. 

He wonders idly if the bootmaker he and Maria visited is connected to them somehow. He was off-putting, certainly. Set every alarm off in Alex’s head and hitch up every red flag, but there is no way to be certain, yet. Everyone he has seen since he was grabbed at Sander's has had their face obscured by a mask or a hood. Usually both.  

Alex is gone for four days before he is rescued.By the time he has had some real time alone to process, i.e. the approximate thirty minutes in the bathroom that he was granted, Alex has landed on his feelings on the matter. On being saved from sure death, on being the rescued part of a rescue mission. He is overcome with earned, rational annoyance.

comment: y’all probably know kieran for her masterpiece scream in there so be warned that there is no cute little baby river included this fic. instead, this is all about an alex-kidnapping, but written more than a month before 2x10. i just love alex’s attitude in this. “overcome with earned, rational annoyance” is my favourite line from the whole thing; i love me some alex-got-himself-kidnapped-on-purpose plot and when you couple it with kieran’s amazing prose, you’ve got 11k+ of brilliant fic. please be mindful of the tags, as alex is a unreliable narrator with some serious mental health issues. kieran notes that it’s “meant to be confusing because he is experiencing intermittent depersonalization” so honestly the fact that she can convey that whilst still maintaining a coherent story and consistent characterisation is why we  love her.

have a fic you’d like to see on the list? let me know!

[queermil]

millie’s long list of malex fics | In the Bleak Midwinter by aewriting / @aewriting

In the end, none of it had mattered.

Not the perimeter alarm Alex had so carefully installed around his property. Not the favors he’d called in from his decade of service. Not the hours he’d logged poring over Project Shepherd files.

No, they’d gotten him on a normal Wednesday, up in Albuquerque, right before Christmas..

When Alex and Michael are caught by Jesse and imprisoned together, they find themselves facing increasingly desperate circumstances. Will they be able to find a way out when it's clear that Jesse has no plans to let them out alive?

comment: any fic that involves the capture of one or both halves of your ship has the potential to be devastating and boy howdy does this fic deliver. probably don’t start this one if you’re looking for a feel-good fic, but if you’re in the mood to enjoy some angst, hate jesse manes, and get real sad about boys who will endure anything for one another, i can’t recommend this fic highly enough. the emotions in this author’s fics are always so raw, so near to the surface, and despite how much it hurt me, i would read it again a thousand times.

have a fic you’d like to see on the list? let me know!