sorry hugo stans i cant fucking stand that bitch! also logan, sorry i really dont get the hype.... i am also not a louigan shipper. i am sorry mutuals.
Bob's Burgers Season 1, Episode 1: "Human Flesh/Pilot"
Original Air Date: January 9th, 2011, Rewatch Date: March 3rd, 2026
Plot Blurb (taken from Imdb): On top of watching his dysfunctional family crumble around him, Bob faces the wrath of a jealous health inspector who cooks up a nasty rumor about the restaurant's choice of meat.
My Rating: 8/10 Imdb Rating: 7.7/10
Review: I initially wasn't the biggest fan of the pilot, but after rewatching it (and letting it replay over and over until I finish this seriously ive lost count), I've come to respect it. It does introduce a lot of really excellent character traits and iconic quotes. It's fun and I laughed a lot. I do think people who hold on to this episode and refuse to enjoy the later seasons because "the early seasons were darker therefore funnier" do need to let this episode go. It's a great episode and a great introduction, but it is far from the best episode in the season let alone the series. I also love the dramatic zooms and bangs of music paired with them.
Burgers of the Day:
"new bacon-ings comes with bacon $5.95" (bob)
"the child molester comes with candy $5.95" (louise)
Trivia:
the plot is taken from the original idea that the belchers were actually cannibals.
Mr. Caffery's corpse has 2 left hands
Opening & Closing:
Store Next Door: "P.F.E.T.A" with a sign that says "meat is murder"
Exterminators: Rat's All Folks!
Credits: bob making burgers and scratching his butt linda serving louise and tina helping in kitchen gene in burger suit
grand opening: fire
grand re-opening: rats
grand re-re-opening: telephone pole fell into building caused by car crash
Notable Characters "Human Flesh" (ie, have something to do/say):
young person (unseen) "oh my god gross!" seeing gene pick up samples off ground
mourning family (2 young, a man and a woman, and an elderly lady) lady doesnt say anything, guy shakes his head (is at protest later and asks if bob is defending cannibalism), elderly lady knocks samples over
the guy who ordered the child molester burger
purple outfit old lady "id try it theres no wait" who comes back later with 24 people "adventerous eaters club"
white shirt guy w chest hair and medium brown hair bob thinks is the shoe repair guy "nope locksmith" at the protest
blonde lady w pearls and a blonde bob and green shirt that looks like cynthia and is always in the background randomly but is not cynthia at the protest
Angry About the Cannibalism Characters:
blue shirt blonde lady who screams at the health inspection sign
really angry ginger kid (no lines)
green shirt brunette guy (while bob/gene are standing in front of the restaurant, (later shouts CANNIBALLL during the angry mob) screaming at poster
pink dress white pants brunette lady who screams at poster
white shirt yellow over shirt green hat blue shorts long hair brunette guy screaming at poster
brunette person in a blue shirt and pink pants "hes gonna eat us!!" and throws a wonder wharf snowglobe at the window
Notable Characters Later in the Show:
Ms. Labonz
Mr. Caffery (dead)
Rollerskating guy
News Reporter
Favourite Moments:
the kids lock the door when bob goes to get in the restaurant after linda's rousing speech
hugo slaps ron after ron calls him out for the real reason he wants to close bobs down
ron is testing his hotdog at wonder wharf
ron is the one who brings the test results to bob
louise giving ron spoiled milk to aggressively sniff
the kids cheering after hugo tells bob its a record to have filled the violations notebook in 5 minutes
how many toothpicks?
hugo asks linda if she ran off w bob the hotshot restaurantaur and she goes "i did" then the grill immediately catches fire
mort yanking gene inside the creamatorium and the burger suit getting stuck
linda looking for a gift under caffery's dead body
hugo hand sanitizing his and lindas hands after holding lindas hand after reading his poem
the kids faces after bob says "youre my children and I love you but youre all terrible at what you do here and I feel like I should tell you id fire all of you if I could"
bob holding gene on his shoulders
gene falling backwards on bobs shoulders and hanging upside down in the window (and the following of bob trying to get him off without straight up dropping him ie running around and shaking him)
first lines:
bob: "listen, pep talk"
linda: "big day for another reason too!"
gene: *making fart noises w sound gun* "it does robot voice, laser sound, and fart noise"
louise: "it's gene's sound effects thing"
tina: "my crotch is itchy"
hugo: "hey you cant give out those samples"
ron: "no"
mort: "shh shh shh shh quick!"
fave lines:
bob:
"just- anyone with an urn, leave em alone!!"
"youre my children and I love you but youre all terrible at what you do here and I feel like I should tell you id fire all of you if I could"
"im not good w dates you know that"
"id hate to get any saliva on you and mr perfect moisture mouth!"
"and theyre over there in their little van inspecting themselves"
"im not gonna assault you" *immediately tries strangling hugo*
"welcome human flesh right this way"
*shushing ron while people who want to eat humans walk into his restaurant* "shh! shh! ron! shut up! shut up!"
"we write hurtful things on posterboard!"
linda:
"I would rather be married to a suspected cannibal with a dream, like you than a soft lipped guy who never had a dream in the first place"
louise:
"its spoiled milk, dummy!"
"did you check the toilet or in the garbage" (asking linda after linda says hiding jewelry/a present in a burger or the drain and louise goes thats romantic??)
tina:
"so youre the health inspector? cause I think I have some kind of rash or something"
"moms really handsy"
"now my rash smells like bacon and it doesnt itch anymore, I think we're gonna be okay"
gene:
"I cant keep track of who's in mourning and who isn't"
*after coming out of the bathroom* "you have no idea what I've just been through, do I have any toilet paper stuck to my buns?"
"is hugo gonna be our new dad?"
"youre a couple of sluts!"
hugo:
"the burger joint's natural enemy" *hawk screeching*
"where are the grown ups??"
"hello, the media!!"
"I dont tell you how to grow your corpses" *bob tries to attack hugo again*
multiple:
bob: "ya know what im taking the chalk"
louise: "like I dont have chalk"
bob: "i know you think its the gene show out there but theres a line between entertaining and annoying"
gene: "no thats a myth"
tina: "so is hugo going to put dad in jail because you dumped him??"
linda: "no hugo is going to put your father in jail because your sister told her class that we serve human flesh now why would you do that honey whyyy"
Lore:
labor day weekend always makes or breaks them
bob and linda worked on wedding night bc they couldnt afford not to
wedding anniversary september 3rd, 9/3 nine is divisible by 3
bob is at least 40 (turned in flashback)
labor day weekend (september 3rd)
cash only
ron doesnt have a badge yet, he just started
4% of human flesh allowed in food by fda
hugo just transferred to this town
gene does know how to use a fire extinguisher
bob didnt know about hugo and linda
linda was engaged to hugo and left him for bob
hugo knows their anniversary same way linda does "9 divisible by 3"
anita vasquez (girl in louise's class) uncle is a matador in spain
linda's parents liked hugo (they got engaged when she was young) bc he always did the dishes
hugo is an excellent kisser (soft, low moisture)
bob has a lot of moisture when kissing
the lift in the crematorium goes out and opens directly on the sidewalk
other stores/places:
jimmy pesto's pizzaria (across the street)
yours truly stationary (across the street)
wonder wharf amusement park
yellow building hotel
health inspector's office
its your funeral home and creamatorium next door
shoe complete me
falafel on a waffle
bog harbor (mentioned by mort)
signs the protestors have:
not himburger
cannibalism w a strike and circle
cook cheeseburgers not me-burgers (thats a kid that goes to the school, big tommy I think??)
dont taste me bro
keep me out of meat
dont put our sons between your buns
whos the beef
eat me? eat me!
coffins:
candy coffin white box w red ribbon, taffy inside coffin (mr caffery owner of mr caffery's taffy factory)
blue with gold accents
sarcophegous
black with gold cross
boblin kisses:
bob kisses linda after she tells him hugo was an excellent kisser w not too much moisture and his kiss is sloppy and wet
bob kisses linda on the ferris wheel after closing and he looked at kissing tips online
other notes:
the health inspection poster image is a dead human between burger buns
ms labonz was at the protest
news headline: "cannibals or can-o bull?"
testing meat rhyme: if its yella, salmonella, if its chartreuse, it's a deuce, and if it's blue, it's your aunt sue"
$50 a burger x 25 (if they only had 1)= $1250 profit (lady said its a deal)
"none of your loved ones used as food" sign on creamatorium
hugos poem: inspector of health, inspector of pain, I came in search of human remains, and I found a piece of human flesh I thought I'd never see again...my heart
hugo's violations notebook:
*took 5 minutes to fill* hugo: "its a record"
10: greasy
11: dirty sticky floors
12: disgusting smell
13: rashy grill cook (tina)
14: no supervision
15: unsafe work environment
flashbacks:
"todays your birthday?" bob to linda
"todays my birthday?" bob to linda
"your due date was today?" bob to linda (we dont know who the baby is, likely gene?
louise at show in tell with a burger saying its made from human remains
pet/nick/insult-names:
"baby" by bob to linda
"dummy" louise to ron
"pal" bob to hugo
"honey" linda to louise
outfits:
bob:
grey pants, white over the neck apron with pen in pocket, black shoes, mustache
variations:
yellow birthday hat with "happy birthday," purple/blue star glasses, balloons: same purple happy birthday with presents as linda, green star with red lining happy birthday with yellow star, white with orange circle and purple and red stars "over the hill," orange star with red front yellow stars "fourty," blue "happy 40th birthday," green triangle "happy birthday"
linda:
red buttoned long sleeve, red glasses, blue jeans, white shoes, has white waist apron with pen in pocket
variations:
blue and red triangle party hat with red frills on bottom with purple happy birthday balloon
white blue dots hospital gown
tina:
black glasses, light blue tee, dark blue skirt, converse, white knee highs w red stripe, yellow barrett
gene:
burger suit, yellow shirt, blue shorts, red shoes
louise:
black shoes, green dress, pink bunny ears hat, yellow hair ties
