So in the midst of my training for what I had hoped would be my best marathon ever, London... I have acquired a suspected stress fracture in my foot after my most epic half marathon run in Farnborough just over a week ago!! This is causing me to be both irritable and frustrated! I know that if I rest it properly my training will be more or less unaffected or minimally so, but there is that gremlin in my brain gnawing away at me telling me that that’s it, you’ll do it but it wont be great like you had hoped! In a way It will be great because I am running for Mind the mental health charity, and raising much needed funds for them is worth it regardless of the time in the end, but for personal growth reasons I wanted to be able to own London as my own and say I gave it everything I had!! Only time will tell but in the mean time I will keep up with what strength training I can do without putting undue strain on my foot and crosstrainer.. but it just lacks the same “buzz” that I get from a good run... thebuzz that when I am doing it, I feel like I am going to drop, fighting through the self doubt that says you can’t do anymore then pushing through it and doing it anyways.. and the subsequent high afterwards of looking at my garmin and seeing I have done a better time than before, or I have gone further than I had intended to... and feeling smug and accomplished in myself!! no one can do it for you, and nothing replaces that feeling. It is like a drug, and you find yourself looking for your next fix. So I will patiently sit and reflect on that feeling, and focus on healing... and appreciate the times when I can go and run as opposed to putting it off because I cant be bothered after a long day... as you never know when that day will come where you cant run anymore. and that will be a dark day!!