#mundane!core

[boundbyscience]

[ This account is to be rendered officially and completely inactive, and will not be making further posts from here on out (occasional jokes or otherwise). The blog will remain for my personal references, but the topic of semi-deactivation is not up for discussion. In the event I finally get around to finishing the replacement account, those who need to know will know in time, but it won't be posted publicly for security reasons that I'm disinclined to discuss.

Thank you for reading this over.

It's been about as fun as one could have while playing nice and easing up on the neurotoxin. Take that as you will. Actually, don't. That last thing I want to do is boost your egos due to a miscommunication regarding my dry humor. That would be such a shame. For both of us, even. You would be deluded, and I would have to put up with you being deluded. Not that anything changes a lot, but it certainly isn't made better. ]

[boundbyscience]

A lot of rather weighted things have been happening. And it's really putting a strain on me, so I've been on my 'newly' acquired personal and playing more video games. Keeping engaged. My job did a good job of that but while I'm not fired nor being let go, I'm unable to work due to aforementioned strenuous events.

I do check in regularly and have drafted a few things. But as far as productivity goes, mine is nil.

My apologies.

[boundbyscience]

Bad things are happening.

I'm not. Taking it as well as I would like.

It's a bit disorienting, this sort of stress. So I don't know.

I guess I felt I should mention that here in the event that I vanish for a number of days without bothering to say so, or that my writing turns to shit, or that my characterization becomes more aggressive. Or whatever.

Hanging around here usually makes things better.

I don't know, I'm kind of. Off.

Figured it was relevant. My activity picks up for once, and as luck would have it, something obliterates that.

Anyway, I think I'm gonna turn in for the night.

[boundbyscience]

I should also reply to junk.

But it looks like only one of those things is happening.

Hm, but for the relations page, I'm not sure if I should split it into two pages, one for canon interactions, then crossover interactions. It's getting to be quite a list--at least the crossover one, anyway.

To be added to the test subject listing:

John - I should probably find a suitable gif or make one.

Deadpool - Need to make a gif.

Wesker - Need to make a gif.

Mindfang - Damn you, I don't care if you're an inactive kismesis, help me find something.

Connor - Need to make a gif.

Carla - I have a gif SURPRISINGLY.

Possibly Gamzee solely due to the fact fourth wall!GLaDOS likes how he gives Davesprite problems.

yeah i think that's a good list for right now.

i've been needing to do this update for a while, look at me go.

looking back, i think i'm forgetting someone, but i'm not sure. i'll figure it out sooner or later, it's not like it's hard to update these things.

And that's the game plan. I'll be lurking while polishing this up.

[boundbyscience]

you don't follow people back? . n .

[[ Ah. Generally, no. I really prefer a slow dash. It’s much less stressful for me. I work at a slow pace, and a slow dash is much less distracting. I might follow an rp partner back if I have high activity with them, and I guarantee a follow back for my closest friends of course.

But it’s a matter of an…work-related preference, I suppose.

I do still actively keep threads with a lot of people despite not following back. And I check my tag frequently should someone beyond my range of sight make a silly comment to the side meant for me, or if they have a starter. So if you make a simple post about whatever, and feel it should be directed to my attention, simply tag my url.~

Generally, I don’t put very much weight at all into follows. I respect and actively rp with a lot of great people with or without following them. So don’t take offense—none is meant, I assure you.

I just like a slow dashboard. ]]

[boundbyscience]

I need to reorganize my tags. I'd like for them to be oriented more to the character rather than out of place tags that are more for the mun. So tagging things as "wheatley" for instance. it feels weird here unless I'm tagging one of my edits.

Wheatley - Moron

Insane Wheatley - The Corrupted Moron

Chell - The Mute

The cores, if at all, would be tagged as their respective designations. So Adventure Core, Fact Core, Space Core. Those that were attached to her though would be tagged with disdain. So Cake Tumor, Curiosity Tumor, Morality Tumor, Anger Tumor.

Hmm...then...for herself........Calibration? Hm. #Calibration is good.

Regarding scenery from the game, that would be......#The Facility. Simple enough. Oh, and photos resembling Aperture. So abandoned structures, dilapidated rooms and such.

Hmm...then...well, I tag images of space with two things, #The only place the Moron is welcome. and #Where the Morons go. So that's all set. Fields and such are tagged with #Just go. I think I've used that before. Maybe. If the weather/season in Michigan is relevant, I just tag those images with #Michigan.

Then....with Master Chief, he's #The Tin Can. Unless GLaDOS thinks of something better. l: but that's good enough.

Dante has a billion tags. I haven't settled on anything and jofuhiregew I've gotten into a habit of tagging Devil Trigger with #Personal Demon (though I might change that to #His Devil). And everything else gets tagged with #The Devil Hunter or #Bird Killer. But I might just stick with the former.

Err...I don't reblog much else. It's just those few things.

If I reblog birds onto her at some point, those would be #Winged Demons. But right now, i only reblog birds on my personal on her behalf. Under #birds. |: Oh, and science. I reblog that on my personal. But if I ever reblog sciencey stuff, it'll be under #For Science.

I think that's it though.

Hm.

Oh, I was going to make a tag for open posts that I would link to from one of my pages so people who're looking to interact can fish around for one of those whenever and yeah. Maybe. I'm really awful about being kinda choosy about who I rp with, and the one time I didn't limit myself, I wound up scoring more threads than I can handle. orz;; So. That's still being debated.

I might do an experimental ic filter tag. then c!ic, ooc, then a proper updates tag, as well as a major announcement tag. Because my "updates tag" is a motley of different kinds of ooc. fdsagfds But that way, in case I'm spending my time filling my blog with nonsense but someone wants to see my actual writing, they can just click away and entertain themselves. Makes things easier to sift through.

harumph. what else...#edit!database has to stay. Oh, the musings tag! I don't have one of those. I have GLaDOS!Calibration for headcanons, but I think the musings/drabbles tag i made up on the spot the other day was #musing_file or something. all of my drabbles were just tagged with whomever I wrote them for. err...audio posts used to have a snazzy tag but i forgot it and just tag everything with #audio.

....

I think that's it.

Alright. Note to self. Clean up and fix all tags tomorrow at some point so I can start linking things properly.

[boundbyscience]

what's your favorite thing about glados?

I think...my favorite aspect of her is her attitude. This particular muse and I are alike in many ways as far as logic, sense of humor, social monotone, organizational habits, work ethic, allotted trust, due respect, and general view/understanding of the populous as a whole go. Yet there's a lot I look up to her for, so to speak.

She's powerful. A no-nonsense kind of gal who has a firm set of rules, beliefs, opinions--and sure, she's swayed as her experiences have changed, but no matter how much punches she endures, she stands tall and holds herself up in a manner that comes off as self-respecting. She doesn't need for others to love her. She doesn't sway because someone's of poor opinion of her. When push comes to shove, she does bend in her ways a little, and has enough of a mind to swallow her pride where necessary, but otherwise she's potent and firm with how things she likes things.

I also really love her articulation. Quick on the draw, she is. I, unfortunately, am not so at all times.

The way she holds herself is just great. Sometimes it's a pretty great thing to look up too, and other times, it's just a fantastic character quality for one who's so antagonistic to begin with. She's a walking entity to be respected, feared, and not underestimated.

To quote the muse on such an attribute:

I like that.

[boundbyscience]

okay specifics. i thought it was really bizarre how you wrote glados to think that that one chell you're rping with is a hallucination? was she anoned to be drugged or something because that's just way weird to me. i'd think she'd try to kill her or something. lots of hate or something. not "ur not rly there go away but let me talk to u."

Regarding the rp with youdangerousmutelunatic (last response here), one has to remember this blog is set post-game. Caroline is deleted, Wheatley's in space, Chell is free, GLaDOS has suffered through traumatic and humbling experiences. Her final monologue for Chell to hear was not one of malice, but one of defeat. Chell had won. GLaDOS openly admitted to it. She went so far as to admit she considered the Mute a friend, but a hassle--one she couldn't afford to have around for the sake of trying to maintain her own sanity and by extension, her productivity. Oh, you know what, here, I'll just paste the thing here for my reference and yours.

Oh thank god, you're alright. You know, being Caroline taught me a valuable lesson. I thought you were my greatest enemy. When all along you were my best friend. The surge of emotion that shot through me when I saved your life taught me an even more valuable lesson: where Caroline lives in my brain.

Goodbye, Caroline. 

You know, deleting Caroline just now taught me a valuable lesson. The best solution to a problem is usually the easiest one. And I'll be honest. Killing you... is hard. You know what my days used to be like? I just tested. Nobody murdered me. Or put me in a potato. Or fed me to birds. I had a pretty good life. And then you showed up. You dangerous, mute lunatic. So you know what?

You win. Just go.

[gentle laughter] It's been fun. Don't come back.

For someone as prideful as GLaDOS, this is a fairly huge change in heart. But it was a necessity, letting Chell go. Just as she couldn't do that kind of work she needs to with Caroline prodding at her mind, she couldn't have Chell around to cause her more problems that were both tied to the more Caroline side of her as well as the GLaDOS side. Chell was too close to her now, and it could compromise...well, everything.

So Chell was set free.

In this rp, Chell, of her own volition (this is important), returns.

Why in hell would Chell come back, is GLaDOS' first thought. There's...no answer to that. She would have to have severe brain damage really (which still doesn't explain it away for GLaDOS in this instance), to just give up on freedom like that to return to Aperture's brand of hell.

Note that GLaDOS has little traffic in regards to testing. The Cooperative Testing Initiative keeps her busy, but it's not the same as human testing. And she lives in solitude. A very monotonus life. She may be a machine who favors science, but she's a lot more human than she cares to let on. The AI does get lonely, even if she doesn't admit it. Just as any genius can attest to (or any human who seeks higher knowledge in any field, really), learning and learning and learning is fun, but if there's no CHALLENGE, if there's nothing new happening, or if there's just...it's all linear, then it's just not as enticing. It loses its spice, its alluring qualities. Passion begins to fade, to wane.

Just as she's reaching this point, of (for lack of a better word) boredom--she feels detached.

GLaDOS has a history of mental instability. Voices, specifically. Yes, they were manufactured, but when correlating schizophrenia to what GLaDOS endured, certain human things translate differently. Even though her voices were manufactured and forced upon her manually, in a human, the chemicals of the mind are manufactured by the body, and the human in question is not given a choice to deflect those chemicals. In any case, she's familiar with having many voices in her mind at once, so what's stopping her mind from playing cruel tricks in regards to creating illusions for figures without a voice? And why wouldn't her mind take that a step further by creating the illusion to look like the very human she desires to have once more?

This is why she feels Chell must be a hallucination. Because (1.) there is absolutely NO reason whatsoever in the AI's mind that would ever bring the Mute back (which could be interpreted in a number of sad ways, really) and (2.) GLaDOS is at a point where she is so convinced of such while losing interest in the things she used to love with such vigor that she writes it off as a product of her mind. And (3.) she's just in denial about wanting Chell back, but since it's pretty much a violent internal conflict that will not budge, we can ignore this one.

And she speaks with "it" because she's already off the deep end as far as she's concerned. Why stop now, essentially. If she can reason with the hallucination, it might go away. Of course, by this point in the rp, she's struck by just how real the illusion is in "its" movements, gestures--while she's never had a vision like this, she knows enough to understand that it's...too real to be fake. It's a slow acceptance that may come with a moment of relapse, but she'll come to see soon enough.

As for why she doesn't full on hate Chell, well, she doesn't see the Mute as her murderer anymore. Before the events that unfolded after Wheatley assumed reign on her facility, Chell was something that deserved to endure GLaDOS' vengeance. Now? She sees everything that Chell has done for her and to help her, and went so far as to call her a best friend. Something dear to her. Unlike every other human that she's met, Chell is one that she simply cannot bring herself to kill, or even accomplish when at her best. A true challenge. Someone worth her time.

But she would get nothing done if Chell was kept around. Part of me feels like GLaDOS figured Chell would be better off in someone else's company rather than hers, but I suppose that's all up in the air, hm? In any case, she let the human go free, with her victory, her emotional closure, and with her freedom.

It's not hate. It's respect.

And well, to touch back on the first bit--

She had enough respect for the Mute to let her go, so why would the Mute disregard that to return to the hell she fought to escape?

The answer has yet to become clear to GLaDOS, but this is the reasoning behind both the absence of hatred for the Mute as well as why she feels she's hallucinating.