#my oldest draft

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scanned back cover of 16 Magazine (November 1966)

[bugbugly]

a thesaurus is something that can be so personal. i mean private. i mean individual. i mean exclusive

[cannotflyarc]

@heygutlcss continued.

adjusting her hold on the jeans, she looks up at him. ❝ salvo? ❞ if they have that chain here, she’s never heard of it. with a guardian that could afford to gift her with dozens of roses each week, he never would have allowed her to step inside what sounds like a second-hand store. but that isn’t what peaked her interest. ❝ you were in care? ❞ that was always the threat he string over her. if it weren’t for his kind-hearted actions, she would be in foster care with a cruel family who didn’t love her. 

gaze follows his finger and there’s a beat before a laugh rips out of her throat. ( she didn’t think she would be able to laugh again after anthony ). both hands slap against her lips, but she can’t help the shaking. bellbottoms for her? if only her guardian could see her now. perhaps, johanna should pick up a feather boa and bold pair of sunglasses to go along with it. her guardian would already have a heart-attack at the sight of jeans on his ward. 

❝ sorry, ❞ she says, not for the first time and certainty not for the last. a few deep breaths before she has control over herself again.  ❝ it’s just . . . ❞ a shrug.  ❝ i wasn’t allowed to even wear dress slacks. or go shopping. ❞ but she nods at the bellbottom jeans. even if this only lasts a week, she will have lived for seven days. she doesn’t much want to admit her size to him, even if they are technically married now. 

it’s all so silly, isn’t it? before fogg’s, johanna was a trembling young adult whose guardian still controlled her entire life and now . . . she’s the same but instead of a controlling guardian, her back aches. 

❝ do you think there are two different systems? ❞ really, she knows her feet can’t be that small. right? her hand reaches out to catch him just in case he falls as he wobbles. ❝ for america and england, i mean? ❞ while she ducks into another aisle to grab whatever else, she can take care of a few . . . other items. ❝ i don’t know where the shirts are. ❞

[simon--says]

People are afraid to talk like how we used to. But respect is not gained from holding back who we are. And I know who the fuck we are.

I still remember that night. We was watching that movie that was like Hostel but in Brazil or some shit. Hella stupid haha. You told me about those pains but we thought nothing about what was coming. I haven't really lived up to my promise. You know me, I'm not good with this shit. She has good people around her, she'll do well. I've always felt like a brother. I remember she wrote me that little story for christmas, I still have it somewhere. Used to always come in your room and annoy the shit out of us. Always saw us leaving the house everyday and questioned us. That's how you know she cared.

You know one of the things that kind of pissed me off was the fact that everyone thought I had nothing to say. Like I just snubbed all of it but everyone that knew me, that knew us, would know the truth. We always talked about where we came from and what we were about. Not only that, nothing could take us away from that foundation. It all looked the same but it was built with different hands. That's what allowed us to create. Any given day, took nothing for granted.

We were supposed to grow old together. Fuck the Supra, we were going larger. 

[space-breeze]

Eccentricity is divine.