🕗 2014
Send me 🕗 and a year and I will give you a glimpse at what my character’s life was like at that point in time. thank you, @myoeuns!!
The idol lifestyle was something that Harlowe wasn’t nearly as ready for as she thought.
Even months after her debut, the hate had yet to slow or stop. According to the hundreds of faceless comments she’d caught glimpses of, she was too ugly for the group, a disrespectful bitch, not nearly as talented as their previous rapper Dohee, and so much more. She still found it hard to bond with the other SPICED members, she stopped talking to both her sister and her ex right around the time that she debuted, meaning all that she had of a support system was her grandparents, who had no understanding of what she was going through. No matter what she said or did, even what she didn’t say or do, it was never right in the eyes of Red Hots-- being quiet meant she was stuck up, speaking up meant that she was a bully. People dug into her personal history, even going so far as to make up rumors about her in order to try and bring her down.
It was bullshit. All she wanted was to make music and get a bit of recognition for it, not get witch-hunted over petty matters.
There was a certain point where she wanted to give in and quit. She was tired of the nonstop hate, of having to pretend to be something that she wasn’t and having to fight and act out just to keep a bit of her identity. She was tired of being told what to do, of being coddled, spending countless nights starving and nodding off as she practiced dance routines alone, determined to not be the weakest link in the group. There were far too many times that she went up to the rooftop of their apartment building, allowing herself to tear up and feel emotional as she debated over how she could make her escape. Only one thing managed to stop her: a visit from one of her family’s farmers delivering a crate of apples from her grandparents with a long, heartfelt note of how proud they were of her, how the radio station in Joam made a habit to play SPICED’s music from time to time.
She couldn’t give up. She had to fight back, prove her worth, and make everyone who doubted her eat their words.
