#nami rants

[tarticawhat]

ok so

I have pin-pointed what bothers me about a lot of romances in anime, usually HS ones

if the male lead is reserved and cool/calm/collected, he is usually portrayed as more in control, smarter, more knowledgeable, more mature - when in reality that isn’t the case and just as often he’s...actually a condescending asshole, or at least a jerk

and the female lead’s easier experiencing and displaying of emotions implies that she’s weaker, not in control, not competent, immature

I know that’s not necessarily what they say outright but unfortunately I think it’s an undercurrent in a lot of those (the biggest offender I’ve seen is ItaKiss - in it’s drama forms)

and it really, really grinds my gears

[naminalati]

Man I wish I knew what it is like to not have a mental illness and be able to enjoy holidays and joyful moments without reading or having breakdowns because your inner voice is a fucking menace. or what it's like to have people that can physically hold you together while you're having a breakdown instead of not even bothering to reach out because you only have international Internet friends that could console you and because you don't want to bother your irl support network because you don't want to ruin the holidays

[thebirdsofgay]

Why must my hands do this to me this is terrible

[naminalati]

So here I am, scrolling through the homepage of vlive because I was looking for that one group that has like very chill reading and studying vlives - I forgot the name of the group so I thought this was probably the easiest way to find it - and then I scrolled down further and saw this.

How the hell did the disgrace that is kaachi get access to fucking vlive, and why the hell do they have so many comments? (I'm not gonna click on it to find out what kind of comments they are, I do not want to support it in any way, shape, or form).

Like, I know there are channels for some big Vietnamese and Thai and Indonesian stars, which makes sense to me since the market for kdrama and kpop is also very big in those countries, so there are bound to be like shared/overlapping stars, but this? Idk man, I just never expected a bunch of koreaboos to get their own platform like this.

[naminalati]

Fu k my life

As if I didn't hate the flu enough already. Last night after blowing my nose I popped my right ear because of the sheer pressure (like when you're deep under water or like on a plane) and my ear hurt like crazy when I went to bed, so I took sole painkillers to help me sleep. Woke up with a constant ringing in my right ear and all sound sounds deformed so I got myself an appointment with the doctor tomorrow. Like from one ear all sounds sound like when someone goes robotic on call in discord/autotuned while constantly having the ringing like you've went to a concert and stood too close without hearing protection.

Honestly, if I end up losing my hearing I'd be very tempted to walk off of a cliff because I need to be able to hear in order to cope with life. I need to hear music. I need to hear the warmth in someone's voice when they tell me they care about me. I need to hear the sound of the rain and the thunder, and the rustling of leaves.

[naminalati]

I'm trying to get myself ready for bed to hopefully gain enough rest and strength to deal with my Chaotic stressed to the max© emotional aunts and uncles and the "normally" mourning rest of the family and the preparations for the wake/mourning service and having to deliver our speech and trying to not lose my mind.

I'm just going to rewatch and listen to the little clip of Seventeen answering my question, get lost in Minghao's eyes and smile, reread the little blurb thiby @junghoeseokie made for me, and try to fall asleep. I don't think my life has been this messy or at least felt this messy since I developed ptsd induced sleeping problems fall 2016....

[naminav]

yo since when did gifs become shit on this site or is it jus t me 

[naminav]

when ur follower count starts droppin bc all u are now is bts ahha