Prompt: Over and over again, till it’s nothing but a senseless babble
While everyone else was joyously celebrating their victory over the Galra, giddy with relief and triumph, Lance’s face was drawn like a storm cloud.
Lance… he wouldn’t listen to me. He went straight for the barrier. If Lotor hadn’t—
Matt’s words rang in Lance’s head as he ran to Red’s hangar, making his hands shake with ‘what if—?’ Making his heart pound with ‘if Lotor hadn’t—’
It didn’t even occur to him that Keith might not have docked in Red’s hangar until he saw the stolen Galra fighter parked beside Red, dwarfed in comparison. Then again, where else would Keith go but here?
Lance could still feel Keith’s bond with Red, like a ghost at the back of his mind when he flew. Red loved Keith fiercely—would always love him—something they had in common, which was why Lance suspected he was able to pilot Red at all when his heart sang for Blue.
“Keith!” Lance called when the spotted him, just wobbling out of the fighter. He looked small and unsteady in a way that Keith never was, and it made Lance’s heart clench.
Lance slowed his pace, but he didn’t stop until he was right in front of Keith. Until he could reach out and put a hand on each of his tense shoulder just to feel that he was really whole and okay.
“Matt told me what you tried to do… Why, Keith,” asked Lance softly, hands stroking firmly down over Keith’s biceps.
Keith was pale, and he wouldn’t meet Lance’s eye.
“I—I couldn’t—” Keith broke off to blink furiously against moisture gathering in his eyes.
Lance cupped his cheek and made a sympathetic sound. “Keith,” he breathed.
“I couldn’t just watch, Lance. I—I love you guys. I couldn’t let Haggar—I couldn’t—”
Lance drew Keith into arms, and Keith folded against him like wet paper. He was trembling all over, his finger digging desperately into Lance’s back, and all Lance could do was hold him tighter.
“I love you, I love you all so much and I can’t—” Keith’s voice broke on a wet sob.
“I know, Keith—”
“I love you. I l-love you. I was s-scared and I—I love you—”
Lance carefully tucked Keith’s head under his chin, and rubbed his back, as Keith continued to cry and babble, his words breaking down into an unintelligible, wet, mess.
“Shh, you’re alright,” Lance soothed. “We—I love you too.”
If you’re still doing the “Bad Things Happen” bingo, how about nightmares + Keith with a side of Klance if you’d like?
@badthingshappenbingo
(Crosses are done)
Hoo boy this one got away from, it is long. Hope you enjoy!
(Read it on Ao3 here if you prefer)
Lance was surprised when Krolia pulled him aside. Alone.
He would have thought that she’d want to spend every second she had left as part of their entourage with Keith, seeing as she was leaving with Kolivan the next morning.
Instead, when everyone else was sufficiently distracted with setting up camp for the night, she grabbed him by the collar, and murmured “come with me,” as if she wasn’t already dragging him anyway. She took him into one of more structurally-sound looking dilapidated buildings.
In the close quarters of a dark room, Krolia looked even more intimidating and formidable than she usually did. Lance felt like a child next to her. For him, it defied all logic that Keith’s mother was this behemoth of a woman, even taller than Shiro, when Keith himself was only just average height by human standards. He wondered what Keith’s father was like…
“Lance,” said Krolia, in her characteristic clipped tone, “as the Red Paladin, you are my son’s second in command, are you not?”
“Uh, yeah. That’s me, Keith’s right-hand-man,” confirmed Lance, puzzled and slightly nervous. It occurred to him that he’d never been alone with Krolia before. She seemed to have as much patience for him as Keith had had in the early days of their acquaintance. That was to say, very little.
The slightly dramatic, cheerful, over-confident front Lance put up to hide how goddam scared and unsure he was all the time irritated her, Lance could tell, but being himself wasn’t an option; he didn’t think she’d like him any better as an emotional wreck.
“What can I do for you?” he asked, shifting his weight hesitantly when Krolia only stared at him, those yellow-tinged eyes glowing slightly even in the darkness of the room.
“I need you to look out for Keith when I am gone,” she intoned. Lance blinked, eyebrows crawling up towards his hairline.
“You want me to–? I mean, of course! That’s my job as his right-hand,” answered Lance, flattered that it was him of all people, and not say Shiro, or Allura, that Krolia had decided to ask this of.
Krolia nodded stoically, accepting his words.
“He has nightmares. About Naxela,” she continued.
“Naxela-?” echoed Lance, tilting his head in confusion.
Sure, Voltron and a huge chunk of the universe had nearly been destroyed, but they’d been through similar situations before, and Keith hadn’t even been in the blast radius when everything went down. Of all the things that had happened to them, why would Keith have nightmares about Naxela?
Krolia stared at him like she couldn’t believe he didn’t get it.
“Keith nearly died,” she said gravely.
“Keith nearly what?!”
This was the first Lance had ever heard of Keith nearly dying on that mission, and just the idea made something constrict painfully in his chest.
Realisation dawned across Krolia’s features as she took in Lance’s confusion.
“He never told…” she murmured, before sighing heavily. Her posture crumpled slightly, and for the first time, Lance could see some motherly softness in her. It was hard to make out around her general fierceness.
“Keith never told what?” asked Lance sharply. His jovial facade was very quickly crumbling away, and the shrewd look Krolia leveled at him made him wonder if he’d ever had her fooled at all.
“Before Lotor destroyed Haggar’s ship, Keith was going to crash into it. On purpose.”
Lance understood immediately.
Keith had tried to die for them. The revelation was like a punch to the gut. All these months had passed - years for Keith - and he’d never breathed a word to any of them.
That… that hurt Lance to know.
“He has nightmares about it,” Krolia repeated.
“Why didn’t he tell us?” asked Lance hoarsely, fists clenched and trembling at his sides.
“I… don’t know,” replied Krolia honestly. “I assumed you all knew… I think I only know because he couldn’t hide it from me in the Quantum abyss. He must have his reasons for not confiding in any of you. Don’t push him.”
“I-I won’t, it’s just…”
He didn’t say anything.
“I need to know that you will look after him,” continued Krolia.
“Why me?” asked Lance, mouth dry.
Krolia just looked at him. She looked right through him, and Lance felt heat bloom in his cheeks.
“Right…” he mumbled awkwardly, “don’t worry, I’ll take care of him. I promise.”
He must have said something right because Krolia smiled at him. It really drove home the resemblance between mother and son; they both rarely smiled, but when they did… it was sort of dazzling.
“Thank you, Lance. You’re a good boy,” she said, pressing a hand against his shoulder for a moment.
She departed the next morning, leaving Lance crushed underneath the weight of her revelation. He could scarcely think about anything else, leaving him unnaturally subdued as he turned and turned the whole thing over in his head.
He hadn’t spared much thought for Naxela since it had happened. It had been a terrifyingly close call, and it had irked him that they had Lotor to thank for their lives. Except it turned out that they didn’t have Lotor to thank for their lives, they had him to thank for Keith’s.
Lance kept himself up at night wondering just how close it had been, and cursing himself for not getting more detail from Krolia. If Keith was still having nightmares about it, it had to have been a near thing. He wondered why Keith hadn’t said anything. They’d had him on the comms, Lance remembered. Keith could have said something… it’s been an honor, boys…
Lance wanted to bring it up. It felt like the sort of thing that needed to be acknowledged and addressed; Keith had tried to die for them. It felt important to figure out why. Was it because Keith cared a whole lot more than he let on, or was it because he’d spent so long with the Blade of Marmora that the mission over individual rhetoric had stuck? Had he thought they didn’t need him anymore because he wasn’t an acting Paladin?
Lance needed to find out, but finding an appropriate time to do so was proving to be difficult.
Firstly, Lance didn’t think that Keith would appreciate it if he blurted it out in front of everyone. He was notoriously private, and tended to lash out when he was backed into a corner. Lance needed to get him alone so they could speak in private, but there wasn’t much privacy to be had seeing as they were living practically on top of one another in their lions.
A few times he got as far as saying “hey, Keith–” only for his damned wolf to teleport between them, or for them to get interrupted by someone else’s presence.
“What did you want, Lance?” Keith would say, and everytime Lance would shrug it off because it was awkward to bring up with Coran puttering around in the Cargo hold behind them, or Hunk cooking lunch.
But in the end, Lance didn’t need to do anything to get Keith alone, because Keith got them alone for him.
They landed on a habitable planet with lush forests, and unloaded from their lions to spend the night, and stretch their legs.
Keith made off into the underbrush immediately to collect firewood, Kosmo streaking after him like a bright blue shadow.
Lance heaved a deep sigh; Keith had left so fast that he hadn’t even had a chance to volunteer to tag along before he’d disappeared into the green foliage.
“Lance, can you help me with Kalternecker?” called Coran.
“Stubborn cow…” Lance muttered under his breath, before jogging over to help.
After a lot of tugging and cajoling, they managed to get Kalternecker out of the Blue Lion and happily munching on alien grass.
“Why you gotta be so difficult?” said Lance, staring into Kalternecker’s dopey eyes.
Before Kalternecker could offer a reply, Kosmo popped into existence between them.
Lance shouted in surprise, flinging his arms up defensively, and then Kosmo jumped on him, pressing his paws again Lance’s chest.
“Kosmo! What are you-” Lance tipped and started to fall backwards.
Before he could hit the ground, everything seemed to phase out of existence around him. For a split second he was perfectly still, suspended in nothingness. All he could feel was two warm spots on his chest where Kosmo’s paws rested, and then with a rushing roar, the world snapped back into being.
He hit the ground with a painful thud, knocking all the breath from his body.
“-doing,” he wheezed.
Kosmo filled his field of view, licking his cheeks with a sandpapery tongue.
Lance let out an involuntary giggle, it tickled.
“D-d-d-down boy–” he laughed, pushing weakly at Kosmo’s face.
“Kosmo, please, let him up” that was Keith’s voice, sounding put-upon, and there was Keith’s frowny face, looming over him.
It struck Lance as extremely comical that Keith talked to his space wolf like that, seriously like Kosmo was a person that could understand every single word, and he laughed harder. It was endearing, and it shouldn’t have surprised Lance as much as it did; this was the same boy who hadn’t named his wolf for two years because he was waiting for said wolf to tell him his name.
With one last slobbery lick, Kosmo obeyed Keith and teleported himself so he was sitting at Lance’s feet.
“Thanks for bringing him,” Keith said to Kosmo.
Wait, bringing him?
Finally able to sit up, Lance could examine his surrounding. Kalternecker was nowhere to be seen, and neither were any of the Lions.
He was in a clearing in the forest, surrounded by a wall of trees and dappled sunlight.
“Did you just get your space wolf to fetch me?” said Lance incredulously.
“Yeah…” said Keith sheepishly, scratching the back of his neck, “I’m surprised it even worked, he never fetches anything else I ask him to get.”
“Right,” said Lance, getting to his feet and brushing himself off. Keith watched him do this, shifting his weight nervously. He’d obviously brought Lance here for a reason, so Lance waited patiently for him to speak. Keith began haltingly, face screwed up like the words were unbearably salty.
“I’ve… I’ve been gone awhile. I guess… things have… changed? Since I’ve been gone?”
“I guess?” answered Lance, puzzled about the direction Keith intended to steer this conversation in. He knew what direction he wanted to steer this in, but it was only polite to hear Keith out first before Lance brought up personal information his alien mother had divulged without his knowledge or permission.
“You seem… down,” said Keith, staring at him with those big expressive eyes.
“What?” said Lance, utterly perturbed. That was the last thing he expected Keith to say.
“You’ve seemed pretty down,” repeated Keith, taking a step closer to him.
“I spoke to Hunk and it sounds like something happened, or well, didn’t happen, with Allura?”
Everything in Lance revolted against those words coming out of Keith’s mouth, and he recoiled as if Keith had struck him.
“Excuse me?”
Grimacing, Keith pressed on.
“Look, I know I’m not the best at-at pep-talks, or comfort, but I’m meant to be the leader again, and I just wanted to say-” Keith took a deep breath, “-just because Allura didn’t choose you doesn’t mean someone else won’t-”
“Oh my God. Keith, I need you to stop talking, like, right now,” groaned Lance, burying his face in his hands. Lance had experienced acute embarrassment many many times in his short life, but Keith of all people trying to comfort him over his failed love life was a whole new category of mortification, even for him.
“Kosmo, take me back to the to others,” Lance begged dramatically. Kosmo tilted his head to the side, gazing at Lance quizzically with those unearthly glowing eyes. Keith was looking at him with much the same expression, complete with the head tilt. Lance would have found it unbearably cute if he weren’t so busy being humiliated.
“I’m just worried about you, you’ve been weird for the past few weeks,” said Keith. He was dripping sincerity which was making it very hard for Lance to be irritated at him like he wanted to be.
“I’m fine,” said Lance shortly.
“Are you sure? You haven’t been acting fine… I mean, there are a lot of other girls out there–“
“Me estás jodiendo– it’s YOU, you numbskull!” Lance snapped, throwing his hands up.
“Me?” it was Keith’s turn to look totally discombobulated. His expression turned pensive, like he was wracking his brains for what he might have done.
“Is this about that weird game show thing with Bob?” he asked slowly, a frown tugging at his lips. “Look,” he continued, “it was a stressful situation, and I was pissed that you said I can’t draw because I’ve seen your drawings, and you have have no business telling me I can’t draw–”
“This is getting off track, we aren’t meant to be talking about whether you can draw for not,” said Lance, pinching the bridge of his nose.
“Quit saying I can’t draw!” snapped Keith, bristling like an angry cat.
“It’s about Naxela,” blurted Lance. Keith’s ire melted away, giving way to confusion.
“Naxela?” He repeated. “What about Naxela?”
“UM, you tried to fly straight into Haggar’s ship like a Kamikaze pilot!” Lance cried, waving his arms emphatically.
“So? That was ages ago,” replied Keith, looking at Lance like he was weird for bringing it up. Of all the ways Lance had envisioned this confrontation going down, he hadn’t imagined Keith being so nonchalant.
“Ages ago?” he echoed faintly.
“Yeah, it’s not a big deal.”
“Not a big deal?!”
“Are you just gonna repeat everything I say?” asked Keith, irritation creeping into his voice.
“Keith, it’s a huge fucking deal,” said Lance. It was the most serious thing he’d ever said to him.
“If it weren’t for Lotor–”
“I know,” interrupted Keith. “I know…” he repeated, quiet and subdued.
“But that didn’t happen, so it doesn’t matter.”
Lance could tell from the mulish expression on Keith’s face that he truly meant that.
“If it’s not a big deal, if it doesn’t matter, then why do you still have nightmares about it?”
Keith’s expression faltered, and crumpled. Lance was standing close enough to him to see the way his adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed, and the way his eyelashes fluttered over his suddenly glassy eyes. Lance hadn’t noticed when, but they’d migrated to stand quite close to each other; both of them seemed to have fallen into the gravity of the conversation.
“That’s why you’ve been acting weird all this time?” asked Keith, clearly trying to change the subject.
“I’ve been trying to bring it up with you since your mom told me about it the day before she left,” confirmed Lance.
“Well, consider it brought up and dealt with. I’m fine,” said Keith hoarsely. He looked anything but fine. He looked haunted, and he was hugging himself like he was trying to keep himself together. Kosmo trotted over and put a paw on Keith’s thigh, letting out a high whine like he was trying to offer comfort.
Lance sighed.
“Keith, what you did, or rather, what you tried to do for us, it’s a big deal. You should have told us. We should have talked about it.”
“What would the point have been? Why does it matter?” asked Keith stubbornly, but his voice was wavering.
“Keith, it matters because you matter,” said Lance, sounding pained.
“I wasn’t a Paladin anymore, then. You guys, the mission, they were both more important than me, I didn’t matter.”
“You don’t… you don’t really believe that, do you?” asked Lance desperately, searching Keith’s face. The stubborn jut of Keith’s chin, the guarded, steely look in his big eyes; Lance only found confirmation that yes, Keith did believe that. It broke Lance’s heart, neatly fractured it in two, that Keith, brilliant, talented, earnest, Keith, didn’t think he mattered.
He didn’t know whether to yell in his face how wrong he was, or pull him into a hug.
“Are we done here?” huffed Keith impatiently, crossing his arms over his chest. Keith’s defensive posture, his hunched shoulders, it was like watching the shutters snap closed on the window to his soul. Lance knew instinctively that whatever he said now, it would fall on deaf ears. He tried anyway.
“Nearly. I just want to say… we all have nightmares, Keith. You don’t have to suffer through them alone, if you need me I’m here for you.”
Keith gave a curt nod, before turning on his heel and disappearing into the forest.
Rather than following Keith, Kosmos trotted forward and nudged Lance’s hand with his head. Lance automatically petted his soft fur, tangling his fingers between the strands, and then the forest dissolved around him, and he was back in front of Kalternecker. Before he could blink, Kosmo was gone again.
Keith stayed gone for a long time, and when he returned his expression was guarded. He avoided being alone with Lance for the rest of their interlude on the forested planet, and then, all too soon, they were loading themselves back into their lions for another long slog to whatever destination Pidge and Coran had routed for them.
This time he had Kalternecker as his travel companion, and he was glad; Kalternecker wouldn’t question how uncharacteristically quiet he was being and how his expression had fixed itself into a thoughtful frown. Kalternecker was content to munch on her alien hay, and leave him to his thoughts of Keith. He hated how they’d left things. Maybe if he’s said or done or said something differently, Keith wouldn’t have run off. Keith would meet his eye, and Keith wouldn’t seem more withdrawn than ever.
He considered bringing up what had happened with Shiro, but ultimately decided not to because Shiro was still recovering, and none of them had any idea what memories he might have retained from his clone. The last thing Lance wanted to do was cause Shiro undue stress, and a very large part of him revolted at running to Shiro for help like a little kid because he was supposed to be Keith’s right hand man now. This was something he was supposed to be able to deal with. Besides, Shiro was in the Black lion with Keith, so he couldn’t exactly radio in and speak to one without the other hearing everything he said. He could radio Pidge, or Hunk, or Allura, but that didn’t feel right either, talking about Keith behind his back like he was a problem.
Keith was prickly and slow to trust, and Lance liked to think he was one of a very select few that Keith actually let in a little. One of the few people who got to see one of his very rare, genuinely joyful smiles. No, he couldn’t risk betraying Keith’s trust, even if he only had his best interests at heart.
With no other recourse, and in very Keith-like fashion, Lance brooded.
He brooded so hard he couldn’t manage to fall asleep that night, so he ended up leaving his pallet bed, padding out of the cargo bay to sit in Red’s pilot seat, and enjoy the view of endless stars. Red’s cockpit was perfectly warm, the temperature kept downright balmy as per Lance’s preference, but he still felt cold.
All of a sudden, his peaceful but somber solitude was disturbed. Kosmos materialised behind him, bringing Keith in tow. Judging by the yelp Keith let out, the way he landed flat on his ass with a thud, Keith hadn’t been brought here of his own volition.
“Keith!” Lance exclaimed, standing and walking around his seat to hover over him. Kosmo was staring at Lance expectantly, while Keith had his face downturned so his eyes were obscured by his bangs.
“What brings you here?” Lance asked after an awkward beat of silence.
“A bad dog,” replied Keith, voice especially gravelly and low, even for him.
Lance didn’t know how he managed it, being a space wolf and all, but Kosmo looked at Keith like a parent might look at their misbehaving child while their teacher recounted their misdeeds; disappointed and exasperated.
Kosmos let out a soft whine, and nudged Keith with his head. Nudged Keith towards Lance…
That was when Lance noticed that Keith was shaking.
“What’s the matter?” asked Lance, approaching Keith and getting down on one knee beside him like he was a skittish cat; slowly and carefully.
He set a hand on Keith’s shoulder, and although Keith’s breathing hitched at the light touch, he didn’t immediately push him away which counted as a win.
Lance ducked his head to peer into Keith’s face, and saw that it was crumpled in misery. Keith’s eyes were glassy and red, his lips pressed into a thin tremulous line. The last time Lance had witnessed Keith this small and vulnerable, he’d been grieving for Shiro. Just like last time, something in Lance’s chest couldn’t help but respond to Keith’s distress. Lance was an empathetic person; seeing others’ sadness made him sad too. Lance needed to soothe him.
“Can I hug you?” he asked.
“I-I don’t need– I’m fine,” protested Keith, voice hitching in a way that belied his words.
“I didn’t ask if you need a hug, or if you’re okay–” it was plainly obvious to Lance that the answer to those questions were respectively yes, and no, “I asked if I can hug you because I want to,” he said simply.
“Why?” asked Keith, finally looking up at Lance with those big eyes. The confusion swimming in them was heartbreaking.
“Because I love hugs, they always make me feel better when I’m sad, and well, you look sorta sad, Keith. I wanna help you feel better.”
Lance opened up his arms in wordless invitation.
Keith just stared at him for a beat, blinking in bewilderment, and then he moved so fast he was a blur as he all but threw himself into Lance’s arms. It was as if he was afraid Lance might change his mind if he took too long.
“Easy, I got you,” murmured Lance, catching Keith against his chest, and wrapping his arms around his shoulders. Keith’s hands fisted in the back of Lance’s shirt, and he clung. Folded into Lance’s embrace like this, with only their soft pajamas clothes between them, Keith felt warm and human.
Fragile.
He could feel Keith trembling everywhere they were pressed together. Keith was drawing in short quick breaths like he was trying to calm himself down, ruffling Lance’s hair with every shuddery exhale.
Lance held him tighter, and rubbed his back. It felt like Keith was holding the tension of the world between his shoulder blades, but as Lance idly pressed his fingers into the knots there, Keith slowly relaxed.
Minutes passed, and neither of them let go. Keith’s breathing evened out, and he stopped shaking so badly.
“Did you have a nightmare?” Lance eventually murmured.
Keith nodded, keeping his face tucked into Lance’s neck.
“About Naxela?” That earned him another nod.
“Do you wanna tell me about it?”
Keith shrugged.
“It’s always the same. It’s stupid,” he said gruffly.
“I’ll listen anyway. And I promise I won’t laugh, even if it is stupid.”
Silence fell again, and lasted for so long that Lance didn’t think Keith would speak.
“Um…” murmured Keith, barely above a whisper.
Lance shifted, intending to set Keith back so he could see his face as he spoke, but Keith’s grip on him didn’t let up. Lance got the message and immediately stopped trying to pull away, letting Keith keep hiding his face.
“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. I just think… maybe it could help? Talking things out makes me feel better,” said Lance.
“Along with hugs?”asked Keith.
“Along with hugs,” Lance confirmed, giving Keith a squeeze. “Don’t you feel better?” he joked weakly.
Keith nodded, and Lance’s heart skipped a beat. Keith took a deep breath, and started to speak.
“So… I’m in the Galra fighter,” he began. Lance had never hung on someone’s words so intently.
“This time… Lotor doesn’t come in time and I– I die, I guess.”
“That’s not stupid, Keith. It’s understandable to have nightmares about it–”
“No, that’s not the part– I mean, this is war. I’ve accepted that I might die,” Keith cleared his throat awkwardly.
“What’s the part that is bothering you?” asked Lance, inwardly apprehensive. He’d had plenty of nightmares himself of dying in space and never getting to see his family again, Keith shrugging that off, not being bothered by dying… it twisted something up inside him.
“Um… w-when it happened… Shiro said…” Keith breathing was picking up again, and Lance felt him starting to tense up. Lance didn’t need Keith to finish what he was going to say, Lance remembered.
“Shiro said ‘good job, Keith,’” breathed Lance. Keith nodded.
“He said that and– and y-you guys were all ch-cheering but I’d nearly just– a-and I felt–” Keith was shaking again, and Lance’s heart ached.
“Shh, hey, you’re alright,” soothed Lance desperately, but it was no use; Keith had started to cry. He was obviously trying to to stifle himself, only letting out tiny sniffles, but Lance could feel his tears soaking into the fabric of his nightshirt.
“It’s stupid to feel like this,” Keith choked out vehemently. “It shouldn’t matter, it shouldn’t bother me, but sometimes I dream I-I’m dead a-and y-you’re all cheering and I–I–”
“Listen to me, Keith,” said Lance, low and utterly serious. He pulled back so he could look Keith in the eye, and this time Keith let him. Eyes wet with tears, Keith was the saddest thing Lance had ever seen.
Tutting softly, Lance reached out to brush away the tears with his thumb. “The way you feel isn’t stupid,” he said, “you tried to die for us, and from your perspective, it sounded like we were celebrating. No wonder you have nightmares about it. You know that if we’d known what you were doing, what you tried to do, we wouldn’t have been cheering right? Shiro wouldn’t have said that.”
Keith shrugged.
“I’m serious, Keith. We all really care about you, and not just because you’re the Black Paladin and we need you to form Voltron’s head,” said Lance, unable to help himself when it came to inserting a bit of levity into the heavy conversation.
“I hate that you’ve been dealing with this on your own, and I know the others would too. Anytime you have a nightmare, or just need a hug, any of us would be there for you.”
“I wasn’t totally alone, Krolia helped. I hadn’t had any dream that bad in ages, but since she left…” Keith trailed off.
“How did she help?” asked Lance, genuinely curious. Krolia didn’t seem like the comforting sort. Keith’s cheeks turned pink.
“Um… hugs? And she’d, um… she’d tell me…”
“Tell you what?”
“She’d tell me she loved me,” Keith blurted, ducking his head in embarrassment.
“And that helped?”
Keith nodded, shamefaced.
Lance’s answering smile was fond and indulgent.
“I love you, Keith,” he said easily. Keith’s cheeks turned even redder, and he spluttered indignantly.
“What?! You can’t just–!? You don’t mean– You can’t just say that–” Lance chuckled.
“Why not? You said it helps to hear it, and it’s true,” he replied. “If you asked the others, they’d say the same thing. We all love you. And you love us, too.”
While Keith seemingly wrestled with what Lance had said, Lance got to his feet, wincing at the stiffness in his knee after kneeling on it on the hard floor of Red’s cockpit for so long.
“Keith,” he said to get the other boy’s attention, offering him a hand. With a pinched frown, Keith accepted and let Lance haul him to his feet, only Lance didn’t just haul him to his feet, he also pulled him in for one last hug.
“Do you feel better?” Lance asked, hooking his chin over Keith’s shoulder.
“… yeah,” replied Keith. “Thanks, Lance. I love you, too,” he continued quietly. Something about those words, spoken in Keith’s gruff voice, and with complete sincerity, made a riot of butterflies burst into existence in Lance’s stomach.
Lance drew back and cleared his throat, hoping that the sudden warmth in his cheeks wasn’t visible to Keith.
“Sooo… next time you have a nightmare what are you gonna do?” Lance prompted.
“Um… ask for a hug?” answered Keith hesitantly.
“Atta boy,” said Lance, beaming and clapping Keith on the back. “Now, are you good to try and get some sleep?” he asked.
“Yeah, I think I’ll be okay. Thanks, Lance. I’ll just go back to– hang on…” Keith made a show of looking around the cockpit.
“What is it?” asked Lance, but Keith didn’t reply, he darted into the cargo hold, looking around with an air of desperation.
“Did you lose something?” Lance asked haltingly, following Keith through the cockpit door.
“My way back to my bed,” replied Keith grumpily, crossing his arms over his chest.
Oh.
Kosmos was nowhere to be seen.
“It’s fine, I’m sure Kalternecker won’t mind you bunking with her,” joked Lance, waving an arm at her mound of hay.
Keith gave him a flat, unimpressed look, and then his expression turned sly.
“Last one to your bed has to bunk with Kalternecker!” he exclaimed, and then he was off like a shot, flying across the cargo hold.
“Wha-? Hey! No fair! I didn’t agree to this!” cried Lance, scrambling to chase after him.
(In the end, neither of them bunked with Kalternecker, and Lance woke up the next morning with a mop of black hair on his chest, tickling his chin, and Keith’s hand curled into his.)
(Me estás jodiendo means, roughly, you’re fucking with me)
This is prompt 1 for Keithtober - Whumptober. You can see all the prompts if you’d also like to participate here. :)
“Good job, Keith.”
Good, job Keith.
Good, job Keith.
Good, job Keith.
Those three words reverberated through his skull, and stabbed his heart.
“It wasn’t me,” he replied numbly, barely feeling the words pass his lips.
It should have been him, but there he was, still alive.
He didn’t feel alive.
Even though he was entirely unhurt, it felt like his spirit had collided with that barrier and burnt away into the nothingness of space. All that was left was a shell.
He didn’t realize that he’d automatically flown to the Red Hangar of the castle until he registered Lance standing in front of his parked fighter, waving at him with both arms.
“You looked like you were zoning out, c’mon, space cadet. They’re letting Prince Lotor into the castle,” said Lance the minute his feet hit the ground.
Lance started to walk away, clearly intending for Keith to fall into step with him, but it was as if Keith was surrounded by sticky molasses, and his body refused to move.
“Keith?” said Lance, confusion and concern creeping into his expression.
“Keith!”
Both of them jolted in shock at the sound of a new voice. It was accompanied by the pounding footsteps of owner as they hurtled closer.
It was Matt.
“Keith,” Matt repeated, eyes wild with worry. He slowed his pace as he neared them, panting with exertion and pushing his sweaty hair out of his face impatiently.
“You tried to--” Matt cut himself off, frowning deeply.
“Keith tried to what-?” asked Lance, eyes round with confusion.
Matt ignored Lance in favor of setting a hand on Keith’s shoulder.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
His gaze was just like Pidge’s. Sharp, like he could see right through him.
Keith found himself shaking his head.
Matt and Lance blurred before him and the weight of what he’d nearly done finally hit him.
Lance was surprised when Krolia pulled him aside. Alone.
He would have thought that she’d want to spend every second she had left as part of their entourage with Keith, seeing as she was leaving with Kolivan the next morning.
Instead, when everyone else was sufficiently distracted with setting up camp for the night, she grabbed him by the collar, and murmured “come with me,” as if she wasn’t already dragging him anyway. She took him into one of more structurally-sound looking dilapidated buildings.
In the close quarters of a dark room, Krolia looked even more intimidating and formidable than she usually did. Lance felt like a child next to her. For him, it defied all logic that Keith’s mother was this behemoth of a woman, even taller than Shiro, when Keith himself was only just average height by human standards. He wondered what Keith’s father was like…
“Lance,” said Krolia, in her characteristic clipped tone, “as the Red Paladin, you are my son’s second in command, are you not?”
“Uh, yeah. That’s me, Keith’s right-hand-man,” confirmed Lance, puzzled and slightly nervous. It occurred to him that he’d never been alone with Krolia before. She seemed to have as much patience for him as Keith had had in the early days of their acquaintance. That was to say, very little.
The slightly dramatic, cheerful, over-confident front Lance put up to hide how goddam scared and unsure he was all the time irritated her, Lance could tell, but being himself wasn’t an option; he didn’t think she’d like him any better as an emotional wreck.
“What can I do for you?” he asked, shifting his weight hesitantly when Krolia only stared at him, those yellow-tinged eyes glowing slightly even in the darkness of the room.
“I need you to look out for Keith when I am gone,” she intoned. Lance blinked, eyebrows crawling up towards his hairline.
“You want me to–? I mean, of course! That’s my job as his right-hand,” answered Lance, flattered that it was him of all people, and not say Shiro, or Allura, that Krolia had decided to ask this of.
Krolia nodded stoically, accepting his words.
“He has nightmares. About Naxela,” she continued.
“Naxela-?” echoed Lance, tilting his head in confusion.
Sure, Voltron and a huge chunk of the universe had nearly been destroyed, but they’d been through similar situations before, and Keith hadn’t even been in the blast radius when everything went down. Of all the things that had happened to them, why would Keith have nightmares about Naxela?
Krolia stared at him like she couldn’t believe he didn’t get it.
