i cant find pleasure in anything anymore.

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i cant find pleasure in anything anymore.
im sorry for evwer thinking you evwer liked me.
i dont get positivwe reinforcement or feedback often, so vwhen i do things i feel like im bothering people.
Why do you want anonymous validation?
because most days i feel like shit and that the reason people dont speak to me is because i must be largely unappealing. i just dont knowv in vwhat vway that is. i dont knowv vwhat i can fix.
like a lot of the times it feels like hes ashamed of me. vwhoevwer vwas the anon to ask if i vwas jealous, howv about you ask bull that then? zz:/
i havwe a lovwe hate relationship vwith being alivwe.
im so sick of trying to be friends vwith people vwho vwont try and be friends vwith me.
vwhy am i so bad at making friends?