guys who smoked The Weed That Turns You Into A Hardcore Pit Fetishist but one of them smoked it wrong:
guy 1: fuuuuuck dude there is nothing better than moshing with a bunch of strangers to Thursday and hitting each other for fun and then exchanging a heated glance full of love and violence
guy 2: *imagining being stuck in an almost airtight room full of sweaty pits being shoved in your face* hhoh my godd
I have now officially fully read Homestuck both within and beyond canon. I am legally required now to make a Tumblr account, it is merely an inevitable consequence of my actions.
Enjoy this meme.
I really enjoy philosophizing about the consequences of timeline shenanigans, especially as an outside observer with access to the whole timeline continuum and it's offshoots.
[Edit (5/5): oops I misspoke, I thought the epilogues were the beyond cannon, I still haven't read those]
Okay so. this has been floating around the past few days online. Making this is more so a combination of theories I've seen from various people in comment sections and the like. So while this take is mine, the initial idea is not. Just wanted to put my two cents on the matter.
I'm becoming more and more convinced that both romance options (So far) are connected to Shroud, in a very very important way. After replaying ep1, Toxic says "get out of there babe". Which I won't lie when I first played I thought he was calling Robert babe... Okay listen I thought he was being a flirty to mess with him. ALSO, Robert took off right after he said it. So like... To me, in the moment, it made sense.
Anyway-
It's so incredibly likely that Visi was the one to place the bomb on Robert. It's getting really hard to ignore. She could've very easily been invisible when she placed that bomb on him, my guess when the shields went down right before he took off. Now, there has been some debate on how long Invisigal can hold her breath for her powers. Some using this as a reason to prove she couldn't have placed it on him, seeing as how she needs her inhaler after a fight. But as many have also pointed out, that is after a fight. When she is going about her day, using her powers out of action she doesn't often need to use it. In the pep talk meeting we have she appears in the room, having been there the whole time. I noticed immediately her face was really red, and it slowly went back to normal throughout the scene. And at no point do we, as Robert, fight her in ep 1. So she would have no reason to really be out of breath if she was simply doing one action and then dipping.
Onto Blonde Blazer.
Now THIS is one I don't have much solid evidence towards. It's more so a gut feeling. But she just HAS to be Shrouds Daughter. She's gotta. Yes they do look similar in general, as you find out if you went on a date with her and saw her natural hair. But if you put the two pictures side by side they just look so alike, very much like a daughter would. She also reacts in a very odd way when Robert says that the last Mecha Man was his dad, her reaction coming directly after Robert says it was Shroud who killed him. It seems weird that she didn't know as she tells Robert, considering the public does seem to know it was a family tradition being Mecha Man. Her crystal that controls her suit also is a very similar hue to Shrouds enhancements, and links back to what Toxic said about what it can do for people who already have powers. Now I don't think she's evil, what I think is she's likely embarrassed and ashamed to be Shroud's daughter. After everything he did and what he has become.
Overall there is one big overarching reason as to why I think these two have to be connected to Shroud. It's effect it will have on Robert and the trajectory of their relationship. With Visi, well she might not have been the one to make the call. But she was the one who effectively destroyed his life and family legacy. The reason he lost it all and can no longer be Mecha Man, the one real thing left connecting him to his dad. For Blonde Blazer, she would be the daughter of the man who killed his father. And much like for Visi, Blazer isn't to blame for the actions of the father. She is not responsible for her dad's crimes. But to Robert? With where he is emotionally, so fragile and just barley picking himself back up after losing it all? Knowing the face he is binging to truly care for, someone he may even love, was the daughter of his father's killer... He would definitely not be able to to look at her the same, not for a while. Either of these two reveal would absolutely destroy him.
I can absolutely see a choice for Robert to break up with them after the reveal. Leading the player down a romance reconnection or break up ending. In the end, this is something that narratively has a high probability. Especially for a game drenched in choices.
While I'm unsure on if Visi is on Z team as a spy, I think she could have just as likely felt guilty about what she did and didn't want to be apart of Shroud's army anymore. I also think she is genuinely beginning to like and care for Robert. Which will make the betrayal hit even harder. I know there is more coming between Robert and Blazer, the last two episodes were very Visi focused, so I wonder if 5 & 6 will be more on Blazer. Hitting more emotional beats between Robert and her.
Anyhow, that's my lil rant over. Hope y'all enjoyed! And please remember this is just a theory and for fun. It's all speculation at the end of the day.
Who will win? One gigantic ex-flame hashira? Or the tiny Englishwoman who showed up on his doorstep 4 nights ago with a toddler carbon-copy of his dead son?