send the above for my muse's reaction to being called a monster.
he had lost his mind two years before that. pursuing a justice only the DEVIL could appreciate. he was not apart of the forces dumbledore himself conspired against: but he was not on the force of wellness either. but his eyes are downcast at first, and somewhere along the line; his vision becomes a tsunami; eyelids incapable of holding the hatred and loneliness he held within himself. “if only i was,” he intones, his wand pointed against the neck of peter pettigrew himself. he had thought he fought for the stag and the dog, but he no longer is in possession of the capability of —— of good. “if only i could be the man you think me to be.” but you are the man remus. STOP IT.
holding his guard he tries to brave his emotions, but the small peter pettigrew drew out flashes of something in his brain. [ anger ], [ happiness ], [ laughter ], [ PURITY ] the werewolf seethes, his body not responsive to the ways he wishes to go, convulsing his hand and twisting his neck as it please. loneliness. fright. and so, so angry. an anger that could eat at his bone marrow and leave room for desert. “AVADA———- !”
moony!, a voice cries, soft and happy, from another time.
wormtail?an inquisitive one asks, shocked.
his lips quiver. “what did you say ——- ?" he asks, his eyes wide, searching; and his mouth seeking mind that was not there.
these thoughts. if only he could be the monster these men made him out to be. if only he could be fenrir greyback. if only his bones conformed to the likes of bellatrix lestrange. if only he was tom marvolo riddle. the wand wavers against his jugular vain. a soft beat, moist with poison and blood. this is the skewed life of peter pettigrew he holds in his mad grip. the boy who cared once. and remus thinks. if only he could be fenrir greyback. if only his bones conformed to the likes of bellatrix lestrange. if only he was tom marvolo riddle.
but he can be ——- “a v a d a k e d a v a.” a deep whisper. shaking. with sweat above the lips that speak it. the kind of whisper that never leaves you.
ᴡʜᴏ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ᴀʟʟ ᴛʜᴇ ᴡʀᴏɴɢ ᴄʜᴏɪᴄᴇs.
