hey so I've just started being a vegan and I love it! I've told my mom, but I haven't told my dad yet because I fear he won't be accepting of it and will make me stop (he's called vegans "psychos" and said "everyone needs to eat meat to get their protein" and all that). whenever I'm around him, I have to eat something with meat or animal products which I HATE doing so he doesn't suspect anything. Do you have any tips on how I can share my veganism with him so he'll accept it?
Ahh, this is a tricky one (especially since I don’t know you or your family at all!) so I’ll do my best and give you some very basic tips ^_^
If you’re really not comfortable telling him, perhaps you have any other family members you feel more comfortable telling, and maybe you could ask them to break the news for you (your mother, potentially, if your parents are still together?)
Firstly, approach him when he’s in a good mood, and be polite and positive about it. (E.g. “Hey, do you mind if I tell you something? Don’t worry - it’s a good thing!”)
Prepare yourself for the basic questions and arm yourself with some facts to disarm him if he asks silly questions like “protein??” or “animals will take over the world!?!?”.
Let him know you know what you’re doing - look up where it’s easiest and cheapest to get vegan food and how best to prepare it and so on so that, if he’s the one making/buying meals in your house, he doesn’t freak so much out about going out of his comfort zone.
Defend yourself, but never attack him. However passionately you may feel about it, don’t let it come across that you feel negatively towards him for eating meat or that you want to ‘convert’ him. Even if you do.
If either of you are religious do not bring in or let religion into the conversation, it’ll only get awkward and tense.
If he starts getting angry or too argumentative for comfort, carefully and politely shut down the conversation. This is something you may need to do consistently, at least for a while, if he’s the fight-y type.
Accept that he might not accept it. My father is still bemused about my veganism, but as long as we don’t fight about it and he doesn’t try and feed me animal products, it’s okay.
If he does try to make you stop or call you rude names, just politely and/or nonchalantly remind him that he cannot change your ethics and that this is something you feel you need to do.
If you live in a household, perhaps an abusive household, that will not accept your veganism and will only let you eat meals with animal products, you should not starve yourself in order to avoid the animal products - you are not at fault and you can still class yourself as ‘vegan’.
Hopefully something in that long ol’ mess of words will help you out!! Best of luck xx
