It sucks being invited somewhere and not being able to go because you don't have any money..

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It sucks being invited somewhere and not being able to go because you don't have any money..
Why am I still Unemployed?
So my parents got tired of all the excuses that I always end up making whenever I get a married proposal! Hey, it’s not my fault that all of those were too incompatible! What a girl’s supposed to do???
Now that I am no more a student (since 3 days ago), all my life at the moment is obliged to focus on my carrier! How do I make money in Germany? Oh, why don’t you just find a job via Internet? Yes, I do that but the main problem is the freaking requirements those job ads demand!!!
1. Experience (I just hatched out from the university, how can you seriously expect that?)
2. Laboratory technician degree (Sorry, don’t have it since I was wasting time having Bachelors and Masters degrees)
3. Excellent German speaking and writing skills (I am just a basic A2-German skilled person, don’t push me too hard)
4. Ability to carry heavy weight, withstand low temperature and perform hectic physical work (Do I look like Superman to you!!!)
5. Driving, swimming and diving (No, no, no, can’t do those either)
6. Work with animal poo with Phosphorous as an excuse (Eww! I’m not touching that)
7. Some Engineer, Business, IT person or Chemical (Hey recruitors, why you no like Microbiologist/Molecular biologist???)
Day 66: Being a meticulous perfectionist doesn't work when time is against you. Luckily, a very talented friend @day__one is helping me out with my sketches. Check his stuff out. Anyway, time to inject some coffee directly into the blood stream to ensure one more day of survival. Oh, and one more thing.. Shampooing your beard is the shiznit! #fluffy #beard #nojobyet