drabbles pt 2
Warning: impliedmaturescenes; lots of angst; lots of fluff; didnt proofread 😫
Coming home to an empty apartment had always been hard. Ever since moving to Seoul for your new job at Seoul Hospital, you had hated how empty and cold your apartment would feel whenever you got home, especially after particularly harrowing days. Over the months, the apartment had slowly built up its warmth with photos of your new found friends, and most importantly, with pieces of your entwined life with Baekhyun.
But coming home tonight after that incident, coming off the back of 7 consecutive night shifts before that... the apartment felt the coldest it had ever felt. And you, the loneliest you had felt for a long while.
Baekhyun and you had your share of arguments, with the ever tiring task of finding gaps in your busy schedules to spend together, and the constant stress of hiding your relationship from the public. And recently, his sasaeng fans had started to catch on. You had managed to hide the hate mail from Baekhyun well enough, shredding and disposing the pieces within hours of receiving them. You had tried your best to not be affected by them - after all, these were people that also loved the bright ball of sunshine that you were lucky enough to call yours. Just like Yeri in some ways, although both parties clearly had much growing up to do.
Which is why you found yourself utterly embarrassed and disappointed in the way you were breaking down in the middle of your apartment with the pile of fresh hate mail that had come through today, your mind finding it increasingly difficult to fight the menacing accusations. Perhaps... perhaps you really didnt deserve the pink haired boy that had so easily brightened up your tedious never-ending routine of non-stop patient work and study. That you were too common in your appearances, too plain in personality to deserve to call the nation's top idol your own. That you'd ultimately just be a burden, a setback for the great Byun Baekhyun.
You didnt know how much time had passed before your tears dried, mixed with mascara and eyeliner. You dragged your tired body to the bathroom, scrubbing your face while avoiding your own reflection in the mirror. Your head throbbed, your body finding it difficult to catch up with exhaustion, dehydration and the emotional turmoil. The cold shower felt comforting, a welcoming way to numb the sensations. You catch a glimpse of your face as you blowdry your hair, your sallow complexion, eye bags and blemishes all blazingly clear. You pause in your actions, staring back at your reflection. There was a slight split in your left lower lip, your left cheek pink and swollen compared to the right.
You come out of your trance, jumping as you hear a soft knock at your bathroom door.
"Y/n?"
The soft whisper of Baekhyun, a voice you'd recognise even in your deepest sleep.
"I'm not decent, don't come in," you hurriedly reply, anxious that he would see you in this state.
"Junmyeon-hyung told me everything... please can we talk?" His voice still soft, as if he's afraid he would break you further if he spoke too loud.
"I'm tired, can we please talk another time?" You manage, feeling the tears well up in your now pinked eyes.
"Y/n... please... dont push me away, I'm... I'm so sorry, I should have trusted you, I just... I don't know what's gotten to me these days I..."
"Just... just give me a few minutes...I'll... I'll come out and we can talk?" Your resolve dissolves as you hear his uncertain voice, wanting nothing more than to hold him in a tight embrace but also fearing confrontation. You look back at your reflection, your already plain face a complete mess. You pull out your foundation, giving up after the silky material cakes on your tired skin. You remove it all, wiping your tears with the makeup wipe simultaneously. Splashing your face with cold water, preparing your heart to brave the man you love.
But Baekhyun rushes in through the door before you're done, the door slamming against the bathroom wall in the process. Startled, you look up quickly at the mirror then turn around to see a Baekhyun, his expression unreadable: a mix of incredulous and hurt.
"Baek I said I'd be out -"
"How long have you been hiding this from me for," he asks, his tone upset and his face angry.
That's when you notice his death grip on the letters... the letters you had yet to shred and discard.
"Baek, it's nothing, it's only happened once before I dont think they know enough to go to the press or anything..." You start.
He drops the letters, his eyes welling up with tears as his expression contorts into one of agony, his hands holding your shoulders. His eyes are downcast as the first tears fall, his grip on you tightening.
"Baekhyun..." You whisper, your heart breaking as you watch him fall apart right in front of you, your tears joining his on the ground.
"I can't protect you from these stupid crazy fangirls, I can't protect you against my stupid superficial co-workers, and I cant even protect you against me," he manages between his cries, his arms still holding your shoulders but keeping you at a distance from him. His eyes remain downcast as he continues.
"I'm so sorry y/n... I... I really don't deserve you, I knew you were way out of my league from the start but now look at what I've done to you..."
"Byun Baekhyun you are not out of my league, what are you even talking about? You're kind, you're ridiculously caring to everyone around you, you're amazingly talented and passionate about your work, you're one of the best singers of all time, you're literally the light in so many people's lives..."
"I dont deserve you," he sobs as he finally meets your eyes, your own reflecting the same agony and despair of his.
"I'm the one that doesn't deserve you Baek," you whisper.
It's chaos from this point as you find yourself pressed into Baekhyun, your lips and teeth clashing as your bodies become desperate for each other's proximity. The kiss is messy and filled with the whirlwind of emotions you both feel. You notice that he is still wearing his concert tshirt, his stage makeup still on his face as you fall into bed together, unsure how you had moved from the bathroom to here. Your mind is hazed, focused on the man hovering above you.
"I love you so much," he whispers between kisses, your bodies entwined.
"I love you too, Baek..." you whisper just before he deepens his kiss. You become lost in the taste, the smell of Baekhyun, the pair of you losing yourselves as you tried to convey the thousand emotions racing through your veins.
***
You wake up to the soft sound of Baekhyun snoring, his arms around your shoulders protectively and yours around his middle. Your legs are intertwined with each other's, bodies still bare from the events of last night. You shiver, the cold morning air attacking your bare shoulder in the areas Baekhyun's arms didn't cover. Baekhyun pulls you in closer, his arm moving to pull the duvet higher up before his arm resumes its prior position. He presses a gentle kiss to your forehead, just at the junction between your hairline and face.
"Good morning beautiful," he whispers, his voice husky from sleep and crying.
"Morning," you reply, your hand moving to embrace his cheek as you snuggled in closer.
He opens one eye, a mischievous grin taking over his face as he looks at you before planting another kiss to your face, this time landing on your cheek.
"So... 7 days off right?"
"Mhmm," you nod, rubbing your puffy eyes as your body continues to struggle against sleep.
"Plenty of time to show my love to you then," he smirks, pulling you into a surprisingly gentle kiss as his hands wandered elsewhere.
You pull away from the kiss, feigning shock and disgust as you gently hit his chest.
"Who says you get to get lucky after all that!"
"Not what you were saying last night," he laughs, pulling you into a warm hug as you join him in his laughter.
"I love you," you both whisper. And as you fell back into sleep again, your heart swelled with the overflowing love that you felt for this man, and courage that together you would brave any further obstacles to come.
