Posted @withregram • @raisingwildflowerkids Parents today are knocking it out of the park. We’re spending two or three times as much time with our kids as parents did 50 years ago. We’re educating ourselves about parenting. We’re paying attention to emotional needs and mental health. (We are still works in progress, but we know that too.) In light of this, why do so many parents feel like failures? I believe it comes from being sold a host of unrealistic expectations for our children and for ourselves as parents. We think our kids have to be unicorn sleepers and early readers or we’ve failed them. We think we need the perfect Montessori home, the most enriching educational activities, and a 100% track record of focused listening, patient problem solving, and immediate responsiveness or we aren’t doing our jobs. It’s a fact that a warm and responsive parenting style is beneficial for kids, but expecting perfection from ourselves can backfire. As Bruno Bettelheim noted in 1987, “Perfection is not within the grasp of ordinary human beings. Efforts to attain it typically interfere with that lenient response to the imperfections of others, including those of one’s child, which alone make good human relations possible.” (Bettelheim had some problems but he was right about this.) Growing up with a perfectly programmed robot is not what kids need. They need to learn that everyone makes mistakes and how to handle it when you do. If there are particular situations that consistently cause us to lose it, we need to engage in some reflection. Perhaps we need to adjust our expectations, set better boundaries, or heal wounds from our own childhoods. In the meantime let’s remember that having our kids witness our imperfections isn’t a problem. It’s a necessity. . . . #peacefulparenting #gentleparenting #normalizegentleparenting #consciousparenting #intentionalparenting #mindfulparenting #imperfectparenting #attachmentparenting #reallifeparenting #honestparenthood #honestmotherhood #parenting #parentingmemes #mindfulmama #parentingmeme #parentingtips #parentinglife #motherhoodunplugged #motherhoodunfiltered #parentingunplugged #parentingunfiltered #lifewithkids #parent https://www.instagram.com/p/CJ4O2IonUeS/?igshid=1vrlrs63wp0fp
