As far as I can tell, saying “The Wendigo is a sacred spirit to the Algonquian people” is true only insofar as you can say that “Satan is a sacred spirit to Christians”. Like, it’s a very misleading way to put it.
Fun Polonium Fact #1: One SINGLE gram of polonium can kill 20 million people! (Theoretically) This is because polonium’s high radioactivity can give people cancer!
Fun Polonium Fact #2: I have 129 g of polonium! That’s a lot! Here look, its right over here… I mean where is it? Where did it go? I lost it! Oh no!
Fun Polonium Fact #3: Losing track of you polonium is not good. It kills people!
Fun Economics Fact #1: Economics studies correlations a lot! It was in economics class that I first learned about correlations in a theoretical way. I know what a negative correlation is since then. For example: the amount of polonium in my house is negatively correlated to the death rate in the death rate in my city. When my polonium stocks go down that means I lost some, so it is going to KILL people.
Fun Economics Fact #2: That’s why we study correlations! It helps us find out thinks like I need to find my polonium REALLY FAST, or people are gonna DIE! Maybe I should make a nanovirus or nerve agent next.
A Day in the Life of a Chronically Forgetful Person
Under the break is a short story that I wrote. (Not pertaining to Indigenous people.)
My school day started with math class, where I sat next to my friend Avory.
“Are you ready for the test Wednesday?” she asked as class was packing up.
“Not at all. You?”
“No, I’m not ready either. Would you like to study together?”
“Sure,” I said.
“Today or tomorrow? It doesn’t really make a difference for me.”
I thought of my schedule. I work Tuesdays and Wednesdays, and volunteer Thursdays, but today was Monday, so I had nothing today. “How about today. Should we walk to your house after school?”
“No. I have to stay late at school today. And my house is too loud. Normally I study in the library.”
“The library is quite far from my house. Let’s meet at the coffee shop.”
“Sure,” she said. “At five?”
“That sounds good.”
After that I went to french class, and the teacher introduced a new project where we were to write a story using the subjunctive mood. Thoughts of that project were in my mind as I went to lunch.
At the start of lunch I went to the usual spot to eat lunch with my friends. When I got there, my friend Vance greeted me.
“Are you ready for the concert tonight?” he asked.
Right! I nearly forgot! The Band Battle round one is tonight. Me and some friends were in a band, and we had been practicing for months for this.
“Yes I’m ready.” I said.
“Are you still able to bring snare drum and ride cymbal?”
“Yes. They are sitting next to the door ready to be loaded into the car.”
“Perfect. Thank you.”
“Anything for the best drummer in the world.”
“Thank you, best bassist in the world.”
“What time is the concert again?”
“We’re on at 5:30, but we need to be there at 5:00."
“Okay perfect.”
After lunch, I had english then chemistry, and then school was over. Excited for the Band Battle, I started towards the bus stop for my ride home. Half way to the bus stop, I noticed that I couldn’t see very well. I wasn’t wearing my glasses! I had taken them off to put on safety goggles for my chemistry lab. I checked my pockets, but they weren’t there. I must have left them in the classroom. I briefly considered leaving them behind, but glasses are expensive and I like seeing well. I sprinted back to the chemistry lab and found my glasses sitting on the middle of the lab bench, but it took too long. I knew that by the time I got to the bus stop, the bus would have already left. The next one wouldn’t be for another half hour. Not worth the wait. I had to go home on foot.
I knew that in order to get home in time to go to Band Battle, I would have to run home. But if I’m being honest, I didn’t run the whole way. I was wearing a winter coat, and I didn’t want to sweat. And besides, my cardio’s not good enough to run 9k with a heavy backpack. So when I got home I was running a bit late. I quickly changed my clothes, shoved some food in my mouth, grabbed my electric bass and amp, and jumped in the car to drive to Band Battle. The venue was far away, and the drive took half an hour. I arrived 10 minutes late.
I brought my bass and amp to the stage to set up. My four other band mates were already there. Vance looked at me.
“Hi. You’re here.”
“Sorry I’m late.”
“You’re not wearing your Hawaiian shirt.”
“Oh no! I forgot. I was in a rush as I got ready. Sorry,” I said. The four others were all wearing Hawaiian shirts, and I was supposed to wear one too.
“Should we go to the car to get my drums?”
My eyes widened in realisation.
“Oh no!”
“What?”
“I forgot your drums. Sorry.”
“What.”
“I’m really sorry. They were sitting right by the door ready to be put in the car, but I was running late, and I don’t know… I guess I just forgot.”
Vance was very disappointed. “How am I supposed to play without a snare?”
“I don’t know. I’m sorry.”
There was no time for me to go back home and get the drums, so he had to work with what he had. When we went onstage we played all of our normal songs. Vance made do with using the toms instead of the snare, but it sounded bad. I played the bass lines I’d practiced, but the guilt of forgetting the drums got into to my head during the show, and caused me to make many mistakes. And when it came time for the bass solo, I struggled to play even a single note. We didn’t advance to the next round of Band Battle. I let my friends down.
And when the show was over and we cleared the stage. I congratulated my band mates and said they played well. They were nice enough to say the same to me. I apologised again for forgetting the drums, and Vance nodded. There will always be another Band Battle he said. He was still angry, but he forgave me.
And then I remembered. I agreed to study with Avory earlier today when I forgot I had Band Battle! I opened up Instagram, and found I had unread DMs from her. Where are you? She had asked. We’re supposed to meet at five right? I’m at Bridgehead. Is that the right coffee shop? Please answer me!
I texted back. Oh my gosh I forgot. I’m so sorry. I’m really a horrible person.
