#not-dragon

[verridith]

Another sarka! This one for Soundthebugle on BTACD! He is one of my favorite designs, and I absolutely enjoyed trying out iridescence on his scales.

[verridith]

A Marked sarka design done for Zendekarian on BTACD! He was so fun to design!

[magpied-spider]

more furry not-dragons!

[darael]

On not-draconity, and me.

For a long time, I have been what some would describe as "otherkin".

I'm not going to go into detail on what otherkin are, beyond noting that it's a phenomenon that, contrary to popular Tumblr belief, is not exclusive to Tumblr, or even to the Internet.  Indeed, the first confirmed instances of people being openly otherkin (although the word didn't exist at the time) predate the Internet.

But I digress.

I have identified as draconic for several years.  It never felt completely right - more right than "human" did, but never completely.  Partly, I eventually realised, this was because I know that I amalsovery human on at least one level, but it's not only that.  It took until the last year or so for me to articulate what else was wrong, and it is only in the last few days that I've taken on a new label for it.

I am not a dragon.  However, what I amdoes not have a word in English, or any other language I know (and while I'm not fluent in any others, I've investigated quite a few).  "Dragon" is the one that fits best, but even given the enormous range across the world of dragon-types, it still doesn't fit.  Small wonder, then, that I always felt I was pretending.  I wasn't, but I was still wrong.  This was a bigger problem than it might first appear, because that sense of wrongness affected my entire perception of my inhuman identity, exacerbating the self-doubt I already felt.  I've still not entirely moved past it, but ever since I was able to articulate what the problem was, the doubt has been less crippling.

Until I find, or remember, a better word, I shall describe what I am as not-dragon.  I sincerely hope memory, or continued learning, turns up a better word, because I'll always feel slightly ridiculous saying it.

It is difficult for me to post this.  Identifying as inhuman is scary, for several reasons that I may eventually get around to explaining.  Knowing that there are people who think it's all "special snowflake syndrome" (as if I would choosethis!) makes that worse.  Being in the situation thateven those with similar identitiesmight potentially judge me so?  That'shorrible, and I'm only half-sure I'm actually going to hit the "Create post" button when I'm done typing it.

But I have to do it.  Partly so that people can have a clue what I'm on about when I talk about being not-draconic, but mostly because it's part of who I am, and I couldn't live with hiding it.