1. I have the SPECIAL cataracts that GROW FASTER and are EXTRA STICKY!
2. Which is why I have them now—I’m a bit young for this. That’s getting rarer for me. :D
3. My eye surgeon is like if Whittaker from the Pitt had an $80 haircut and was in private practice. I almost called him Huckleberry.
4. He did say “We definitely need to take the left eye out,” then went “Sorry—“ and I was like “No, that’s cool, that makes it sound hardcore.”













