Okay so last night (Saturday) we had a holiday party at work. I got drunk on vodka, and then one of my coworkers got me high for the first time.
I learned a few things today at work. (After I forgot like, everything that happened at the party). I’d like to set some groundwork: sober, I’m anxious and I hate being touched and I can’t stand my GM or the owners son. Okay, go.
Things I learned today about the Christmas party:
I remember like. Nothing that happened on Saturday night from the moment I left the office, til the moments leading up to the raffle. It’s little flashes of “did that?”
I apparently hugged the GM and the owners son multiple times. Just walked up to them and told them to hug me. (And APPARENTLY a second time one of them walked away and I told who I was talking to, “I just wanted a hug.” And pouted.)
I danced. Like a fucking lunatic. And I have zero rhythm. There are videos. I’m stomping and spinning around like Ariel just got her fucking legs.
Weed speeds everything up and slows it down all at once? Or weed mixed with vodka does?
I may or may not have had pasta? Idk. I think I teleported from getting to the party, losing my fake money, getting a drink? I don’t even remember the drink just the line for the drink? Or there was no line? I think I thought I was the line. Oh god I can’t fucking remember anything before the raffle as more than like dream memories holy fuck
I think I remember flirting with the dealer at the blackjack table. Like. It feels like I teleported to the blackjack table like the world wasn’t real for an hour and then bam there I was and she had pink hair and then idk what happened
God I hugged so many people.
I lost like, all my chips. (Which were how you got raffle tickets)
I walked around arm in arm with my least favorite sales person? Just, happily walking around with this person I can’t stand on most days
I hung out with the only kid at the party? Idk if I was scaring her or what but we chilled and I usually hate kids too
Apparently I am so full of love for the universe when I’m drunk and high that I completely forget about personal boundaries and just spread the love?
I may have told the scary sales lady that “you’re kinda mean sometimes but you’re amazing” and she hugged me. I think I remember two hugs but at the same time I can’t really trust my memory of the event
Anyways kids that’s my drunk and high night. Remember. Only do drugs and drink under supervision and if you have a ride home.
Also maybe don’t do both at once and dance like a crazy person in front of three dealerships worth of employees—including your boss, your bosses boss, your bosses boss’ son, and two other dealerships worth of pasta (I was going to edit it bc I meant people but fuck it I’m leaving this typo here bc it’s a mood)
Also do it after you eat the pasta otherwise you won’t remember what was apparently some fucking delicious pasta because everyone else is raving about it the next day and you’re like “did I even eat pasta” when yep you did you just done fucked up and missed out on a foodgasm
