#once crazy

[oncecrazy]

Even the Savior Needs Saving

Once Upon A Time has given us some truly amazing female characters. Femaleempowerment has played a huge part in this show with these brilliant women whoare so strong, intelligent, and powerful in so many different ways. They aren’ttypical damsels in distress that wait around wishing for a man to save them, they save themselves, and in many cases, their man too.

Television in general has come so far in the roles available to women. We know have many television shows that depict women as brilliant doctors, lawyers, fire women, politicians, surgeons, policewomen, FBI Agents, scientists, professors, businesswomen, and so much more. They are incredible role models that teach us that women can do anything a man can do, and in many cases, do it better.

What is special about these shows, is that they are done in a team format. We have a team of FBI Agents, a team of surgeons, a team of firefighters, etc. All of these teams have to work together in order to take down the criminals, save patients lives, put out the fires, etc. Usually these teams are composed of very different people, each with a specific set of skills necessary to overcome the challenges that come their way in their field of work.

On Once Upon A Time, we have team that is a fairytale family, fighting against the villains that continually try and take away their happy endings. Each family member has their own set of skills that is helpful and beneficial in finding out the motives of these villains and taking them down.

However, this show focuses largely on female empowerment. While that has done a lot of amazing things there is also a flipside where it is having some negative effects on the show.

Thinking back to 3x22 when Emma was trapped in Regina’s castle, we saw her use the wire off of her and Marian’s spoons to pick their cell locks and free them. As they were trying to escape they ran into Charming, Red, and Hook. After realizing it was each other, Hook asked Emma, “What the hell are you doing? You’re depriving me of a dashing rescue!” Emma responded, “Sorry, the only one who saves me is me.”

That was something that hit the core of the irritation I’d had for awhile.

In season one we were introduced to Snow and Charming. They were brilliant Once versions of beloved Disney characers. Snow was the opposite of the Disney princess who lay down on the ground of the dark forest to cry because she was afraid. Snow White was a tough bandit that could take care of herself. 

As we got to see through Enchanted Forest flashbacks, one of the reasons their relationship worked so well was that they saved each other. They ran from monsters together, had adventures together, and took turns saving each other. They have the strongest relationship of any couple on Once because of that.

We now have a beautiful family with a lot of relationships, but it isn’t functional. And one of the main reasons is this bizarre way of thinking that some of the women, especially Regina and Emma have, that the only person who is going to save them is themselves.

We’ve seen a shift in the attitude of this show since season one. We have Emma and Regina who are two incredibly strong women that happen to have magical powers. Emma of course, has savior magic, the most powerful magic of all.

Because of that, it demotes the rest of the family to “second class citizen” status. Emma sees herself as the savior who is solely responsible for every single person’s happy ending. Regina sees herself as an incredibly powerful queen. She knows what she is capable of, and now that she is using light magic, she will be capable of so much more.

As much as their families want to rally around and help, you can’t help but wonder what goes through these women’s minds. Do they feel as though their family is unhelpful? Do they feel as though without magic their families are in immediate danger against these villains? Do they feel that their family is honestly just going to get in their way?

Emma answered this question in 3x20 when she insisted on going after Zelena alone. David insisted she take Hook with her. A frustrated Emma asked, “What is he going to do? I’ve got magic, he’s got one hand!”

This is where the problem lies. We have two powerful women who feel like because they are the only ones with magic, they have to do everything alone. By the same token, the writers keep delivering villains that can only be defeated with magic, leaving everyone else at a disadvantage, and dropping the responsibility of defeating them in the laps of Emma and Regina.

At the same time, our men are doing less and less and less when it comes to defeating the villains. Often times they just get to stand there. They rarely yield swords anymore or get to do any fighting. They’re also becoming human punching bags. They are constantly in danger, being targeted, being hit around and being hurled to the floor. We have a literal ship in this fandom known as “Captain Floor” or “Flook” dedicated to how many times Hook has been hurled to the floor.

In short, our men are turning into damsels in distress. The writing isn’t allowing them to do anything besides stand around or get thrown around. ABC tries to sell their sex appeal in promoting them, but the writing is slowly taking that away from them.

Thinking back to some of these other television shows, there are many times where members of the teams, both male and female found themselves in danger and needed saving.

On an episode of Criminal Minds, SSA Emily Prentiss was sent into a house after an unsub. While trying to help a victim she was hit across the head with a 2x4  and had to page her team to come and save her, the victim, and the unsub’s child as she lay on the floor in severe pain.

On an episode of Grey’s Anatomy, Dr. Christina Yang suffered an extra uterine pregnancy, requiring her coworker, Dr. Addison Montgomery to perform emergency surgery with her co-worker Dr. Bailey assisting to save her life as she was starting to bleed out.

On an episode of CSI: Miami, CSI Calleigh Duquesne suffered smoke inhalation and stopped breathing. Her co-worker CSI Eric Delko caught her and held her as he screamed for someone to call medical. When she arrived at the hospital Dr. Alexx Woods, a former medical examiner for the team, had to race to save her life. 

Those are just a few examples of times that team members have needed saving. No one thought any less of these women. No one viewed these women as failures. Needing to be saved did not make them any less significant at their professions. It did not make them any less as women, as heroes, or as human beings. In fact it made them more human to viewers.

The point of all of this being that nobody is perfect. Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has failures. Everybody has days where things and people get the best of them. Even the heroes need saving sometimes. That doesn’t make them any less of heroes.

These women I used as examples are still role models to women all over the world. The teams I talked about on these shows have had times where each individual member needed to be saved, no matter how strong they are.

In order for these characters to be human and relatable we need to see all the facets of human emotion in them. We need to see that they aren’t always tough. The men can have hard days and cry. That’s actually an attractive quality. But we also want to see them on horseback tearing after the women they love and wielding swords and bows and arrows against the villains.

The team element is really being lost here as two of the women are put in positions that leave everyone else feeling useless and helpless. And it’s not difficult to write these women needing help occasionally while still making them appear strong.

Imagine a situation where Regina is playing with Roland in the forest and a monster appears. Regina tells Roland to run back to the Merry Men’s camp, but his foot gets stuck in the mud. As Regina hurries to free him the monster hovers over her ready to strike. We see Robin's arrows fly past Regina and stun the beast long enough for Regina to regain her footing and hurl magic at the beast, defeating him. 

At the very least, Robin got to do something to help. They worked together to defeat the beast. Now re-imagine the same scenario again, but remove Roland. Lets say Regina was having a bad day and was struggling to defeat the beast and Robin’s arrows were what actually killed the beast. Would that make Regina any less of a woman, hero, queen, human, etc.? No it absolutely would not. It would make her more human to see that even sometimes the Evil Queen needs saving. Or at the very least the Evil Queen needs to accept that teamwork is crucial in defeating villains.

In Emma’s case, a lot of her attitude about saving herself comes from always being alone and having to spend her entire life fending for herself. So a lot of her journey is about learning to open up and accept other people and their help in certain situations.

We saw this learning curve with her in season two where she was insistent that she could handle herself in the Enchanted Forest and Mary Margaret had to save her from an ogre. That was a really beautiful episode that humbled Emma in a lot of ways. She wasn’t used to people putting her first and this family dynamic she was now a part of. 

While that was incredibly beautiful, it’s really the only time that Emma hasn’t saved herself. (Elsa was the one to save her from the ice cave, but that was about Elsa’s empowerment and their bond over magic, bringing it back to empowerment)

Ultimately in Emma’s mind, as I mentioned before, she sees herself as solely responsible for every single person’s happy ending. Family or no family she carries that weight on her shoulders and feels like she has to do everything alone because it is her sole responsibility.

These women are only going to find themselves in dire situations again and again if they don’t accept that they are part of team. Like it or not, they are a part of a family where everyone has strengths that they can contribute to taking down the villains and finding happy endings.

We as an audience want to relate to these characters and their stories. And that is really difficult to do when Regina and Emma are held to this standard of perfection and the symbols of female empowerment.

I want to see women who are strong, kick butt, and can save their man when they have to. But I also want to see men who are strong, kick butt, and can save their woman they have to. I loved seeing Snow rushing to save Charming and throwing the dust at the trolls. But I also loved Charming galloping on horseback as fast as he could to save Snow from the Evil Queen.

If ABC is going to promote their men as sexy strong men, then stop hurling them on the floor and let them get their hands dirty once in awhile! If ABC is going to promote these women as symbols of empowerment, then let me be symbols of empowerment, but let them be human and realistic and don’t hold them to a level of perfection that they or no woman can accomplish.

Even the most brilliant surgeons need surgery. The toughest FBI Agents need backup. The most intelligent scientists need assistance. Even the strongest teams cannot succeed unless every single person does their part by working together. Even the strongest teams will not have victories unless they are willing to accept failure, back each other up, and save each other when they need to

And even the savior needs saving.

Xoxo-L

[oncecrazy]

Why Rumple’s 4A Storyline Was About So Much More Than The Hat

*Thismeta is a preface, in a way, to another meta. It’s a point that needs to be made in that meta, but a point that also needs to stand on its own.

Rumple’s main storyline this half season, came in the form of the Sorcerer’s hat. He saw it, and saw a way to rid himself of the dagger yet still keep his power. That makes perfect sense, and would be the ultimate dream for Rumple. 

Here’s the problem. I’ve watched this storyline get heavily debated. And in a lot of cases people are quick to defend him saying that he was traumatized by Zelena controlling him and Neal sacrificing himself for Rumple. So of course he wants to rid himself of the dagger.

Yes, that is all true. But it was so much more than just ridding himself of the dagger…

He started off the season at Neal’s grave. He made a promise to make things right with Belle and give back the dagger saying, “I need the strength to give it back, to be that man I should be, the man you died for. And I pledge Baelfire, I will be that man. Your heroism showed me the way. I promise I'll spend my life repaying you for that."

That was an incredibly beautiful scene and a beautiful promise. So literally one scene later he sees the box and changes his mind. On his honeymoon night he uses the real dagger to open the box and unleash the hat.

This season has had me thinking a lot about Neal. Back in season three when Neal was dying, Rumple was there. He sat on the rock and listen to his son tell Emma his dying wish, that she find Tallahassee and her happiness.

So when Emma confesses she wants to rid herself of power, Gold sees her savior magic as an opportunity to give the hat the rest of the power that it needs. He is not only breaking a promise that he made at his sons grave, he is deliberately destroying his sons dying wish and preventing it from ever happening. We don’t know what happens when you get sucked in the hat. It may be deadly, but he doesn’t even give a second thought to sucking Emma in.

Hook makes the point “she’s mother to your grandson.” With or without Neal’s dying wish she is the mother of Rumple’s grandson. She did everything she could to save his life when Hook poisoned him and she called him family. But somehow that doesn’t mean anything.

As soon as he realizes his plan to suck Emma in the hat failed, he takes Hook’s heart out to destroy it as part of the spell of cleaving himself of the dagger. Blackmail or no blackmail we all know Rumple would have taken Hook’s heart anyway. He hated him enough before the blackmail to not have hesitated.

But going back to Neals dying wish, Hook is the person Emma is trying to have Tallahassee with. This is the person Emma is trying to be happy with and honor Neal’s dying wish with. And Rumple doesn’t hesitate to go after him either.

When the Snow Queen’s curse comes, he reveals that he plans to leave town with not only Belle, but with Henry as well. For a third time, he tries to prevent his sons dying wish from happening. There is no way Emma’s definition of Tallahassee includes losing her child forever, something Rumple should clearly understand.

Yet here he is for the third time trying to prevent his sons dying wish. He spent hundreds of years doing everything in his power, crossing realms and worlds to get to his precious child, and for what? He may as well have spit on his grave and done a tap dance on it for all the blatant disrespect he showed for his child this season in going back on promises and trying to prevent his dying wish from happening. Not to mention the fact that his son died to save his life, and this is how he repays him. That level of selfishness alone is truly incomprehensible.

Beyond his deliberate disrespect of Neal, we learned the hat needed more magical beings to gain enough power for the spell. Rumple didn’t even give a thought to what happens to these beings. As I mentioned when I was talking about Emma, we don’t know what happens when you get sucked into the hat. For all he knows he just forced a man to massacre an entire convent worth of fairies and didn’t blink an eye. And he forced Hook to kill the Sorcerer. The hundreds of stars on the hat could literally represent hundreds of murdered beings.

The final part of all of this is Belle. This is where the second meta will come in, so the brief version of this comes down to three things:

1) He started his marriage out with a lie and continually lied to her.

2) He emotionally and psychologically abused her. He manipulated her and allowed her to believe that she was the monster. He let her crumple to the floor and sob believing that she was a horrible person.

3) His “fulfilling” her dream of seeing the world was actually him separating her from her friends and family forever. She cannot go back to Storybrooke once she leaves. She just made amends with her father and has friends and now more family through Henry in Storybrooke, and he is isolating her from them forever.

Ultimately, Rumple’s storyline this season was not about him wanting to cleave himself of the dagger. It was about showing just how selfish he truly is. Adam and Eddy said “Everything Rumple is doing is for a reason, and those reasons are for himself” and that’s exactly what we saw. As Rumple told Hook “Me wins every time.”

This season for Rumple was not about a man who was traumatized by being controlled by a witch and losing his son. It was about showing what a sick, twisted, selfish, narcissistic person he truly is.

The creators made their point with him, the next step is to see where they intend to go from here having made that point. And when you read part two, you’ll see I’m not so sure I want to find out.

Xoxo-L

[oncecrazy]

The 6 Week Time Jump, the REAL Reasons Behind It, And Why It's Horrible For the Fandom

*Some spoilers ahead. Only warning.*

As we saw in the winter finale, we’ve fallen victim to a six week time jump. Adam and Eddy have said in recent interviews that the six week time jump is so everyone can get “settled in.”

I don’t buy that for a second. That’s a lame excuse for either a deeper or even lamer motive. So I’ve decided to examine the five possible real reasons for this time jump:

1. Will and Belle. In case you’ve missed out on all the juicy set gossip, the latest rumors are that Will and Belle are a couple. If this is the case, then poor Will is probably getting the plot device treatment as Adam and Eddy continue to preach hope for Rumbelle saying that they are just in a “dark chapter” in their relationship and overall story. 

If Will is a plot device, then the six week time jump aids them nicely in the sense that we don’t get to fall in love with Will and Belle falling in love. It lessens fan attachment to them as a couple big time, and Will can serve his purpose as plot device until Belle…takes…Rumple…back. *Shudders* 

2 Regina Pregnancy. Yes, I’m aware that Once Upon A Time has been ruled out as TV Line’s Pregnancy Blind Item. But I honestly would not be shocked in the remote slightest if Regina ended up pregnant. Ultimately, it gives the characters incentive to go and find Robin. Otherwise Regina’s focus is the author. Unless Robin or Marian were super tight buddies with the Queens of Darkness and will have all the answers on how to defeat them, there’s no reason to try and find them, nor is there even a way to find them with the curse on the town line.

We also have the promo for season three with Regina’s face looking sad, scared, ashamed, etc. and Emma saying, presumably to her, “We’ll find him.” I’m guessing that Emma is either referring to the Author or Robin. If Henry were in trouble Regina would go into super mama bear mode like she did in Neverland. She’d be hell bent on getting Henry back. (And from the BTS pics of filming so far, Henry doesn't appear to be in any immediate danger)

At this point, her happy ending looks pretty messed up. But the only threat to finding the author would come from the Queen’s of Darkness. But if you poke the bear it growls back. Regina may be sad over Robin, but if the Queens of Darkness taunt her, she’s going to get sassy and taunt back. That’s who Regina is. And having six weeks to sulk and try and move on from Robin, she’d probably be at her sassiest. So a sad/scared/ashamed reaction doesn't really fit there. That’s why I’d be quick to guess pregnancy.

And six weeks means the math adds up. It’s been long enough for her to realize that she’s pregnant and have the period math add up. Fans won’t be whining that they "only had sex a week ago and it makes no sense." 

3. Robin and Marian. They've already made it a point to do everything possible to keep us from getting attached to Marian. This limits her screen time by not leaving the feel that we need to check in on the Hoods to make sure they’re still alive every five minutes. They can just show us their established life outside Storybrooke and call it good.

4. Skip the Sulking. It gives them the opportunity to skip Belle and Regina’s heartbreak. I don’t think anyone wants to watch them sulk around and mope for half a season. Hopefully by jumping six weeks they've gotten their lives somewhat back together and the worst of their misery is over. (On the plus side that lessens fan misery as well)

5 Regina and Emma Friendship/Magic Lessons I wouldn't be surprised if we found out during this six week break that Regina and Emma spent many nights doing shots and are now best friends forever. Yeah that sounds ridiculous, but the writers are pushing this friendship so hard, I wouldn’t be shocked if the show came back and they had matching friendship bracelets and super awesome magic lesson sleepover parties (Yes their friendship feels just that forced)

It also gives Emma's power six weeks to get even stronger, further developed, and more in control. She'll need it with four villains coming back to town.

While a six week time jump might be a breath of fresh air, I actually think it’s more of a nightmare than beneficial. The more I think about it, the more I hate it. For ten reasons:

1 Skipped Hook and Emma development. A huge part of this show right now is the development of this relationship and all of the adorable milestones we've gotten this season. But as it is so new, I cringe to think of everything we missed during that six week time jump. Did we lose out on the first “I love you” or “coffee?” How many more dates of adorableness have been missed? This is absolutely horrible if you are a Captain Swan fan.

2. Baby Neal. It’s no secret that baby Neal has been played by dozens of different babies. It’s not hard to tell that it’s a different baby in almost every single scene. Babies grow so much in six weeks, so important baby milestones may have been missed. 

But if the babies are older, it’s going to be even worse if they try and pass dozens of older babies off as the same baby. Their features will be even more distinctive and it will be even more painfully obvious than it already is. I would hope they’d hire a set of twins or triplets soon. But I worry that will get put off until season five since they went straight from filming 4A to 4B. Not a lot of time to find and hire babies.

3. Henry’s Age. At this point, any type of time jump is beneficial to Henry’s age as Jared is growing so fast. However, we know in the spring premiere he gets on a school bus, an elementary school bus. Yes you read that right. The oldest Henry can be at this point is twelve. And he doesn’t look it or sound it in the slightest. He’s shooting up like a weed and his voice dropped how many seasons ago? He doesn’t even remotely pass as a twelve year old.

Would it have been so awful to send the kid to Jr. High? Have him thank his moms again for the awesome “thirteenth” birthday party they threw him before school started as he hugs them goodbye to get on the Jr. High bus? This isn’t hard!

4. History Repeats Itself. Emma will say for the umpteenth time that “things were just getting back to normal” or “But we were just getting settled” and we will all groan as history repeats itself again because heaven forbid we come up with any new material.

5. Marian and Robin. They've had six weeks together with the knowledge that they are never going to return to Storybrooke. So what if they've rekindled their romance? Does that mean more angst for Outlaw Queen? Regina pregnant or not, do Robin and Marian have to go through heartbreak again?     

6. Rumple. Adam and Eddy have promised we will see a much more “humbled” Rumple in New York. I have no idea what that means, but I doubt it will last. Especially once he sees Belle potentially with a new man and a new life. His gratitude journal may have gained a few pages over the last six weeks, but ultimately I don’t buy that the Dark One has changed that much.

7. Missed Charming Family Bonding. Between the newborn, Frozen, the Snow Queen, and a devilishly handsome pirate, we didn't get much bonding time between Emma and her parents. In fact, I think we all spent more time being mad at Snow for how she treated Emma this season, than we did actually enjoying the little bonding time they did have.

The key time for bonding would have been during this “getting settled” period. We've missed out on a lot of opportunities with bonding moments between Emma, her parents, and her baby brother. Sit down dinners, playing with baby Neal, Father/Daugher bonding at the sheriff's station when it's slow, etc.are all gone as fast as the ideas came.

8. Henry/Hook Issues Resolved. We saw Henry encourage Emma to ask Hook out despite the fact he wasn't okay with it. We never got to find out why. But this six week period might give them the best friends treatment. We might come back to one happy family with Henry magically adoring every aspect of Emma and Hook together and skip the part where any conversing actually gets done about Henry’s disapproval.

The fandom made a really big deal about that scene, and it might not be one that had a lot of depth or context to it initially, so the writers could use the six week time period to sweep that under the rug.

9. Pregnancies. The six week time jump makes a case for multiple women to discover they've got a bun in the oven. While pregnancies and babies are wonderful and adorable and every individual fandom wants them. There are theories flying around out there that make the case for Emma, Regina, and/or Belle to be potentially pregnant. But on a show with constant action, it would make it extremely difficult for the leading ladies to have anything to do. I don’t think anyone would allow Emma or Regina to fight villains if they were/are pregnant.

Some fans want a Rumbelle baby. If/when Belle and Rumple actually get back together, they should solve their issues before bringing a baby into it. I’d hate to see Belle feeling like she has to go back to him because of the baby. That’s just horrible, and not a solution to their problems.

10. Plot holes. The six week time period is a really good way to justify things they don't have an explanation for. They could throw in something like new information being found out about the autor or how to free the fairies, but not actually tell us how they found it out. Meanwhile the fandom is awake all night having heated debates about poorly covered mysteries.

Moral of the story? The six week time jump is not our friend. It's the writers friend and a tool for the them to tiptoe around things in the storytelling and cover other things up. Meanwhile we miss out on important milestones and are left in confusion with many blanks left unfilled.

Xoxo-L

[oncecrazy]

Prince Thomas/Sean Herman: What Is Going On?

During Sundays 4x07 episode there was a scene where Henry approached Regina to tie his tie. Before that she was flipping through the storybook. 

When she flipped past the picture of Cinderella and Thomas I did a double take. I rewound it and paused. 

Cinderella's face and hair looked very cartoon-y while Prince Thomas' looked much more realistic and detailed. But even weirder than that, I did not remember his hair being that long. I dismissed it thinking I was over thinking and decided I would look up the original episode later.

After mentioning it in a group a friend of mine put up a photo with the actual screenshot in comparison:

I follow Tim Phillips who plays Thomas on Twitter and he shared this photo of himself about three weeks ago:

Judging by the dates on his Instagram/Twitter photos it looks as though he's been growing his hair out since February. 

So why the need to change it in the book? Why put so much attention into such a tiny detail.

My instant thought was that we'd be seeing him in Storybrooke with long hair and they were trying to smooth it over. But he's been in Storybrooke long enough that it's completely plausible his hair grew out.

And obviously they must have had some contact with the actor in order to update the picture to resemble the hairstyle the actor currently has.

Besides that, we have the baby confusion. Alexandra should be two or three by now. And baby Alex was dressed in boy clothing at the mommy and me support group. I was ready to believe this was actually their second child until Ashley said that it was a support group for first time mothers. 

And yes I'm aware that they can dress their baby however they want. However on a television show where attention to detail is extremely important, you'd think they'd want to make sure the gender was more obvious. 

Something really fishy is going on with this Ashley/Sean storyline. I'm really starting to think Ashley's cameo was not a "one and done" deal. Everything in film is done on purpose and with a purpose. And the lack of explanation from any of the writers on any forms of social media is leading me to believe it may be part of something bigger they're trying to keep under wraps. 

Xoxo-L

[oncecrazy]

Rumbelle

*Thank you to those that have been asking me for months to write about this for having patience and sharing your views. I really appreciate it!

I fell in love with Rumbelle after “Skin Deep.” I thought it was so cute the way he caught her when she fell opening the drapes. I loved how the curse started to break when she kissed him. I loved the thought of her seeing the good in him, and him falling in love with her in return. To be honest, I didn’t like Rumple at all until “Skin Deep,” but this piece of back story made me root for him in a way I hadn’t before.

Unfortunately, my joy was very brief when seven episodes later in “The Return,” we learned what really happened to Baelfire. Before you start to defend Rumple because he was “in shock” or “scared to death” or you start blaming Milah, there is video footage of Adam and Eddy saying “Rumple chose magic over his own son.”

I have watched that scene several different times. It’s not as though he only had two seconds to make a decision. He had a decent amount of time to think about it. But you know what the real problem is here? He shouldn’t have even had to think about it.” I’m not even a parent yet, but if it were my child and Walt Disney was standing there with the key to Disneyland and a billion dollars to let go of my child, I still wouldn’t let go.

Rumple had a choice: Magic, or his son. He shouldn’t have even taken a split second to consider keeping magic. The fact that he considered it, watched and listened to his child scream for him, and still chose magic is pretty sick.

I thought Belle getting released from the asylum and finding him was sweet. Although at the same time it was rather disturbing as her last memories of him were of him gripping her tightly and throwing her in a dungeon. 

So as soon as she realized who she was, some of the first words out of her mouth were “I love you.” We are talking about the man who threw you in a cell right? The man who screamed at you? The man who was terrible to you?

He tells her he loves her and there will be time for all of this but first there is something he must do. If you step back and look at the whole picture, he believed for 28+ years that his true love, and the only person that could love him for the monster he is, is dead. He gets her back. He gets that second chance at happiness. But instantly he’s off to get magic back. How can you put magic before your true love you were just reunited with after 28+ years? 

In the first few minutes of season two he promises Belle that he won’t go after Regina. And what does he do? He twists her words and goes after Regina. So in the space of ten minutes he’s chosen magic over Belle twice. She of course realizes this when the wraith starts terrorizing Storybrooke. She has her hissy fit and is upset that he didn’t change. In a later conversation she agrees to take things slow with Rumple, but she wants to get to know him better. And while he’s standing there promising to be honest, he’s lying about killing Milah. He never, ever gives her the full truth about anything.   

Then we had the writers trying to prove to us that Belle was a bada$$ princess like all of the other princesses on the show. We saw her go up against the Yaogui. The first time, Mulan saved her, the second time she used her book smarts to discover that Phillip was the Yaogui. We also see Hook attack her in the library. And she runs to the elevator and stands in there crippled with fear calling Rumple to come save her. Then we had her go after Hook’s ship by herself. She freed Archie and then sent him to get Rumple to come and save her. To give you a tally, in one episode that’s one time she saved herself verses three times someone had to save her. Aurora’s tally is probably better than that. That was so disappointing to me. She was supposed to come off as strong, but instead she came off as someone who runs into situations she can’t handle and then has to call to be rescued. Books are wonderful, but before you go charging after monsters, at least learn how to wield a sword, or get some friends to go with you or something. For someone who is supposed to be so smart, she came across as extremely weak.

Below deck Belle talks with Captain Hook. They talk about Milah, where Hook tells Belle what really happened to Milah. And Belle does not believe him. Hook points out that everyone he’s ever gotten close to has either died or run away, so why is Belle any different? She says because she still believes that Rumple has good in him and that Hook’s heart is rotten. That conversation alone tells you what kind of a fantasy Belle world lives in. She refuses to believe anything bad about her Rumple, but is so quick to see the bad in others. It’s as if she’s blinded by him.

Well not five seconds later Rumple starts beating the crap out of Hook and Belle begs him to stop because he’s better than that. She just said she could see good in him but Hook’s heart was rotten. Well you just learned your dearly beloved murdered his ex-wife and is now attempting to kill the pirate to add to his massive body count. Does she not realize the extent of what he does as the dark one?

This season we also got to see through flashbacks what exactly happened with Milah. Now I plan on writing more about Milah in detail in a later post, but the basics for now are actually quite interesting. I can’t imagine living in a town of widows who all lost their husbands at war hating you because yours injured himself to come home. Milah would have the same “coward” staple that Rumple got. I’m not saying Rumple was wrong in coming home or that Milah was right in wishing he’d have died. Obviously Milah starts fooling around with Hook and Rumple just wants her to come home.

We get a conversation between the two of them in “The Crocodile” where Milah expresses to Rumple that this life isn’t the life she wants. She doesn’t want to be live in a town where Rumple is seen as the village coward. She expresses that she wants to move somewhere else and get a fresh start. She says they could see the world together. She’s willing to do that and leave Hook and what happened with the ogre wars in the past. And Rumple? He’s not willing to compromise. He just goes on a tangent about how this life can be good. When Belle and Hook have their discussion on the ship, Hook says that Milah begged him to take her with him.

One of the things that drives me crazy the most in this fandom is how Milah is looked upon as some evil witch, to the point that the actress who plays her, Rachel Shelley, is very distant from the Once fans and community. Everyone blames Milah 200% for everything that went wrong with Rumple. Did you all just miss the scene where she was willing to compromise, leave Hook, and start over and Rumple wasn’t? Yes she is a pretty terrible person, but a relationship takes the work of both parties. I saw her willing to compromise but nothing from Rumple.

We see Rumple and Bae reunite. Obviously Neal isn’t having it, and it doesn’t help when Rumple refuses to acknowledge his fiancé because he believes that he and Emma will rekindle their love. When Neal isn’t giving him the time of day, he decides even though Belle doesn’t have her memories she’s his only hope at continuing his path on redemption.

Then we get to the episode “Lacey” where unfortunately Belle has been given new memories by Regina of being a “scantily clad barfly.” Rumple tries being nice, but Belle isn’t having it. So he proceeds to do terrible things, like beating people, to turn her on.

On the flipside of this episode we have a flashback to when Belle started working in the castle. And Rumple is literally skinning people and forcing her to clean the blood off the aprons. She spends her days listening to people scream while they’re tortured and she falls in love with him. It’s like they took “Skin Deep” and flushed it down the toilet. All of its redeeming qualities are completely shot. Then we see Rumple shove Belle in the ground to force her to watch him kill Robin Hood.

I don’t know if you ever had to sit through those slideshows in school about women in the middle east that break the law and are buried halfway in the ground like that and stoned to death, but that was all I could picture watching the episode. It made me physically ill. And then Rumple listened to Belle and missed his shot. He gives Belle the library and we see her have admiration for him in her eyes. Remember the other day when you listened to his victims scream? Remember the blood you cleaned up? It’s the literal equivalent of being abducted by a serial killer and being forced to clean up after each murder, and then falling in love with him.

I firmly believe that people can change. I firmly believe that you cannot go so far down a terrible path that you cannot redeem yourself. But there’s a difference between helping someone that sick and falling in love with them, and allowing that love to blind you to their horrific crimes and murders.

At the end of season two we see Rumple bring Belle’s memories back just as the town is about to be destroyed. The town is of course saved and Belle wants to go with Rumple to Neverland, but he insists she stays back and cloak the town. Not once does she call him out on beating people and treating them like crap to turn her on. She just hugs him and dotes on him and completely sweeps that behavior under the rug.

Upon returning from Neverland and finally being free of Zelena, Rumple and Belle reunite and she makes him promise to not kill Zelena. Sound familiar? And he agrees and gives her his dagger and proposes. And of course he gave her a fake dagger and immediately goes to kill Zelena with the real one. Belle marries him in the next episode not knowing any of this and completely tossing aside her original plan of wanting to take things slowly.

So how does this all tie together? Rumple is a narcissist. Now before you start throwing tomatoes, hear me out. I lived with a narcissist for eleven years and have done my research well. There is no doubt in my mind that is Rumples mindset. Think about it for a minute. Have you ever once heard him say “How are you feeling today Belle?” “How was lunch with Ruby?” “How is she doing?” “How is everything at the library going?” What do you think about this or that?” “Tell me about your childhood” “What is your favorite color? Flower? Person? Place? Book?” etc. He doesn’t. Every conversation they’ve ever had is about him and his past. As far as Belle goes personally, we really don’t know that much about her because Rumple never asked.

Narcissists believe they are always the victim and have done nothing wrong. And that’s how Rumple very clearly sees himself, from the village coward, to “losing” his wife and son, to losing Belle etc. Most of his motives are based around getting revenge on the people that have done him wrong, because he doesn’t see that he did anything wrong.

Narcissists also always believe that it is their way or the high way. Milah wanted to compromise, but it was Rumple’s way or the high way. Emma wanted the gang to stick together in Neverland, but it was Rumple’s way or the high way. Bae wanted to go to war, but it was Rumple’s way or the high way. When It came to who Neal wanted to be with romantically, it was Rumple’s way or the high way. In every deal he’s ever made, it’s his way or the high way.

Another quality of the narcissist is that they believe the world revolves around them. Truly and honestly they do. As mentioned above with Belle and him never asking her personal questions, it’s not hard to see that. If you pay attention, every conversation that happens around Rumple, is about Rumple. You can’t walk into Gold’s shop to have a discussion about anyone else in Storybrooke. It’s always what he did to them. What he can do to help. What he has in his shop. He’s never involved in group discussions, because he doesn’t play well with others. His world revolves around him and he does what he wants for himself.

Narcissists contribute very little to their relationships. Think about him and Belle. It’s always her doing the talking, giving the speeches, initiating the kissing, etc. In the terms of him and Bae, he went and got Neal in NY, but then did nothing to further their relationship once he was back in Storybrooke. In the case of Milah, she was the one willing to compromise, he was not.

Narcissists are very two faced and manipulative. They will lie and distort facts to achieve their own agendas. They act very differently in public than they do in private.We see this constantly with Belle. He is sweet and kind to her face but goes behind her back and kills people, abducts people, beats people, turns them into rats, etc. He manipulates her by telling the stories of his tragic past but conveniently leaving out parts like killing his ex-wife. He twists the stories to make himself the victim of every situation.

Narcissists are arrogant, they act superior to everyone around them. Sound familiar? They are very controlling and unable to relax? Sound familiar? Have you ever actually seen the man sit down? They have a lack of sympathy for others. The line “Well that’s quite a list of grievances now, isn’t it?” comes to mind. Narcissists regularly provoke people, and then blame them for the fight. Like how Rumple goes after everyone he believes wronged him, starts a fight, and then plays the victim. Sound familiar? Of course it does because we tune in every week to watch it.

Some of you are probably ready to throw things at me, but take a look at individual scenarios:

1)      Getting Bae back. He didn’t care that the curse would affect thousands. He didn’t care that Snow and Charming would be separated from their daughter for 28 years. He honestly wouldn’t have even cared whether Charming found Snow or the baby’s name so long as he got his true love potion and an opportunity for the curse to break. He didn’t care about Regina or emotionally manipulating her into learning magic so she could enact the curse. All he cared about was getting his son back. The one person that mattered to him.

2)      Bringing magic to Storybrooke. He didn’t care that he was risking Henry’s life or that Emma and Regina were brokenhearted over their sons death. He didn’t care about risking Emma’s life to kill the dragon. He cared more about bringing magic back to Storybrooke than he did about reuniting with his “true love.”

3)      Revenge on Regina. When he reunited with Belle and she finally told him the story , he wanted revenge on Regina. Belle’s wishes and desires didn’t matter. Only what Rumple wanted at that moment mattered. So he proceeded to be two faced and manipulative and sealed it with a kiss.

4)      Saving Henry. Instead of revealing who Pan was and making a group plan and having a group plan vs. Pan, he went off on his own. His plan, his way. He didn’t look at the Snow and Charming way of finding ways around things. He just marched off to his death to be the hero.

5)      Their wedding vows. He talks about himself the whole time! I wasn’t just unloved or unloving, I was an enemy of love. He talks about how he has no idea how she can see the good in him, the man behind the monster. Ummm….what about “I love you Belle, you’re the best thing that ever happened to me. You make me the best version of myself. You bring light to the darkness. You are the most kind and loving person I’ve ever met.” No. His vows were all about himself.

The final thing about narcissist is that in order to have a relationship with one, you have to be willing to play their games. You have to be willing to accept what they say without argument. There is no compromise with a narcissist. You literally have to be willing to be walked all over. You have to accept that you will be their doormat and you will never get anything out of that relationship.

Think about Belle. She gives her all to that relationship and if you honestly think about it, she doesn’t get very much back in return at all. She allows herself to constantly look past all the horrific things he does and only see the few good that he has. She buys everything he says hook, line, and sinker. And she is always giving him pep talks, which boosts his ego. That’s why Rumple went seeking Belle when he couldn’t find what he needed in Neal. Neal wasn’t going to take the time to pet his ego and give him pep talks. Neal is going to call him out on his crap and stand up for himself. Neal learned the hard way not to pet his ego and play his games. Neal knows where that gets you.

Belle on the other hand is so in love she allows herself to live in her little “Rumple bubble.” She’s like a little puppy dog that lays down and rolls over the second he commands. And when he plays the sad victim she strokes his ego and gives him a pep talk.  She only focuses on his perfections, which is exactly what a narcissist needs in a relationship.

The point of all of this is that having a relationship with a narcissist is poisonous. Rumple has proved time and time and time and time and time and time and time and time again that he’s not going to change. There isn’t anything he loves more than his personal gratification. Belle is his personal doormat. He walks all over her and she refuses to see it. She will never get anything out of that relationship. It’s emotionally and mentally draining and damaging and I want her to stand up for herself and have the courage to walk away and set an example for women everywhere stuck in abusive narcissistic relationships.

But as they showed us with Hook and the Yaogui, Belle is naïve to a fault. You could give her all the books in the world on narcissism. You could put her in therapy for years and she would still never grasp or understand. She just blatantly walks into situations too far over her head and needs someone to come and save her. But living in her “Rumple Bubble” of isolation, there isn’t anyone that’s coming. Her dad tried but went about it in all the wrong ways and ended up hurting the situation more than helping.

Once is a show about strong women that kick butt and save themselves. They are all powerful, strong, fighters with big hearts. They exemplify the kind of women we all need to be-except in the case of Belle. She has a big kind heart, but she teaches women that it’s okay to stay in harmful poisonous relationships and allow people to walk all over us. She teaches us to enter into terrifying situations we are not equipped to handle and to expect a man to always be there to save us when we do.

I get that Belle is many people’s favorite Disney princess. I get that people love her just based off of that fact alone. She automatically becomes their favorite. Everyone wants so badly to love her character and have her be their favorite. I get that. But this is a show where it is up to the writer’s portrayal of a character, and unfortunately this portrayal is not the version of Belle everyone knows and loves. She’s similar, but unfortunately she’s not the Disney Belle, she’s the naïve OUAT Belle, and there are women in abusive relationships watching this show and staying in them because of her. And that’s where you draw the line.     

As I shared in my other post about rape culture and this show, you can visit loveisrespect.org to help end dating abuse and connect to the National Domestic Violence Hotline. Ending abuse starts with us. Be the voice for those who can’t speak for themselves. 

Xoxo-L

[oncecrazy]

Final Thoughts Before the Finale

          The thoughts I have are random and all over the place, so stick with me here. 

          First of all I'm interested in timing. I don't know Hook and Rumple's timelines match up to when "James" and Abigail almost got married, but what if there were a way for Hook and Emma to save Milah and/or Neal? I know neither of them are supposed to be in the episode, but I would love to see that dilemma of worrying about ruining the future and possibly erasing someones existence on accident, verses saving someone you really love. I think it could be a very interesting dynamic, even if it is through just a conversation between Hook and Emma.

         Continuing along those lines, we see Hook fighting what appears to be himself in the promo. Assuming Hook isn't dumb enough to eat wild and possibly poisonous glittering plants, I'm guessing he's fighting his past self. What if his past self is concerned that he's with someone that's not Milah? Or his passed self is pissed off that he's not taking the necessary measures to save Milah?

         On a completely different note, I think Regina will be instrumental in getting them home, or at least consoling the Charmings.

         Last week when Regina found out Emma lost her magic she responded "How the hell did that happen?" It's clearly dumbfounding Regina. It's not like people just run around taking magic from each other. And if Zelena wanted Emma's power removed, it makes no sense for her to have waited while Emma's magic grew stronger. And depending on Regina's level of unconsciousness, she could have heard Zelena talking about how Hook failed her. If she connects the dots with "Mopey Pirate Syndrome" it won't take much for her to realize Emma clearly gave up magic voluntarily.

         Of course if Emma gave up magic voluntarily, then that pretty much means she was threatening Hook's life. So if Emma risked the lives and pasts of everyone in town to save one man, then clearly she loves him. It won't be hard at all for Regina to connect these dots. As so many have pointed out, as did ABC themselves, since Hook was cursed when he took away Emma's magic, Emma is essentially cursed as well. And how do you break a curse? You give it a nice true loves kiss. (And then put a ring on it before the next disaster strikes.)

         So if Regina realizes that the person with the strongest light magic can in fact get her magic back, then she should be able to find away back to the future. (I'm sure there's a clock tower somewhere in FTL to string some wire too, right? And Zeus can conveniently make his debut with a lightning bolt.) So Regina could either console the Charmings, or be one step ahead of Emma and help her from this side of the...time space continuum.

         We saw in the press release for 3x21/3x22 that Blackbeard will be back. While everyone assumes that Hook and Emma go to Rumple because they changed the future has to do with Hook's hand, but what if Hook somehow saved Blackbeard? He clearly regrets killing him, what if he somehow gave Blackbeard a heads up not to steal the Jolly Roger? Which if you think about it, presents the possibility that if he never stole the Jolly Roger, Ariel never got pissed at him,  he never felt guilt over that, he never swore on Emma's name in a plea for redemption, and therefore never had his lips cursed, so Emma never lost her power. And just like that Emma has power back and Hook has a Jolly Roger ready for a "splashy wedding."

          I vote that the Charmings name their baby "Simba" and have David dramatically stand on one of the tables at Granny's and hold him up while everyone bows and throws salt packets over their shoulders. And then when Hook and Emma screw up the past, James can survive and be Uncle Scar. And when Charming goes flailing off a cliff Snow can cut her heart in half again. If they can both survive with no brains and only half a heart, I'm sure they can manage splitting it again. Jack and her slutty friends can be the brainless hyenas. And little Simba can meet Timon and Pumba at his royal baby playdates. Aurora and Phillips baby can be Nala. Archie can be Zazu. And Henry can be Rafiki. He apparently has a lot of "Hero" speeches in him and I don't trust Emma to be a ray of sunshine or have any more positive advice than "Life sucks, suck it up and deal with it."

           Just kidding. But you have to admit it would be funny. While we're on the subject of ridiculous Disney things that could happen, we know someone will get burned at the stake in the finale. Any chance Frollo will show up and sing "Hellfire" beforehand?

           I still want to know who read Hunchback and thought to themselves "This would make a great childrens movie." I love Victor Hugo, but who thinks of adapting his books for children? It's like "Every Dies or gets Screwed Over: The Disney Adaptation." End of random rant.

          I change my mind about the Lion King. I vote that Hans is the next villain. He can be from the royal reality show "12 Brothers and Counting." and the season ends with Regina and Robin having...fun...behind closed doors. Henry or the Merry Men are watching Roland (apparently not closely enough) and it starts to snow in Storybrooke. We see Olaf start to form in the distance and Roland knocks on the closed door and says "Do You Want to Build a Snowman?" And cut to the credits.

         It won't happen, but I can dream right? 

        Back to the land of things that are not ridiculous, I'm really excited for tomorrows episode. There's not a doubt in my mind that Hook and Emma will be together by the end of the episode. And most likely married in my book. I know everyone is still set on a Rumbelle wedding, but Adam and Eddy have said multiple times in interviews over the last few days that Belle may or may not even find out that Rumple was lying until next season. So she can marry him knowing that he lied during his proposal, or she can get married blindly and season 4 will be all about how Rumple sleeps on the couch for the rest of his married life and the fans go after the creators with clubs for ruining their ship. Next season is supposed to be more about Rumple and what's going on in his head, (Which hopefully includes common sense.) So a journey for him and Belle next season makes more sense there too.

         In closing, I just want to say thank you again for everyone who has taken the time to read my writing and sent messages, followed on Tumblr/Twitter, joined my spoiler group on Facebook, reblogged, liked, etc. It means the world to be part of a fandom that is so passionate, kind, and friendly. Virtual hugs to all!

         There will be a post for the finale episodes, even though we'll have a conclusion leaving little foreshadowing, I can't help but appreciate the amazing between the lines things that go on in this show. 

Xoxo-L