Onion Beef roundup.
http://www.theonion.com/article/work-friend-accidentally-becomes-real-friend-17504
http://www.theonion.com/article/overeager-simpleton-destroys-which-he-loves-most-56197
http://www.theonion.com/article/report-750000-americans-die-each-year-during-first-52848
http://www.theonion.com/article/disgusted-researchers-cant-even-bring-themselves-f-56445
http://www.theonion.com/article/nike-introduces-new-line-sauce-wicking-competitive-56443
http://www.theonion.com/article/rec-sports-league-organizer-needs-cool-it-emails-56577
http://www.theonion.com/article/report-rise-global-temperatures-likely-increase-nu-56600
http://www.theonion.com/article/man-who-jumped-motorcycle-hijacked-bullet-train-ne-56592












