Oct 22, 2024
I did it again …
Mann why am I like this
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I did it again …
Mann why am I like this
Well, it’s been a week since the end of our beloved NCIS LA, and Sunday nights will never be the same. I’ve been meaning to post something that feels like a farewell and the first Sunday night after seems to be the right timing for it.
I found NCIS LA when I was in grad school. My first time out on my own, living in a crappy apartment with a roommate named Karen who was exactly as whacky as you’d imagine a person getting a master’s degree in opera could be. I don’t even know how I found the show, it must have been a rerun. But there was Deeks and there was Kensi my brain immediately said, “Wait, okay, one of them must have been injured at some point, right?” And I found Personal and the rest is history.
I had written and posted fanfic before, but nothing to the scale at which I posted Densi fic. I don’t even know how I had time to watch the show and write in between classes and working basically forty hours a week, but I made it happen because I had to. These beautiful characters had a grip on me that wouldn’t let go and the ideas just refused to quit.
Halfway through my first year I found Tumblr and was very excited to have a place to chat about Supernatural. Instead I found a happy little corner of the internet and friends I didn’t even know I needed.
@raccoonsmate4life, @aprylynn, @ejzah, @glenncoco4, and @wanna-be-bold you all have become such an incredible encouragement to me. I don’t know where my writing would be without your constant support and validation and endless kind words.
@mashmaiden, the keeper of the fandom, the person to whom no question was too small or too obscure, thank you for your service and kindness. I have often said you are the kindest person in the world, and I do truly mean that!
@chrisodonline, my saltiest of friends, I have enjoyed our chats so much. You made the highs feel higher and the lows feel bearable. I am lucky to know you!
And @bluenet13...well, I don’t even know what to say about our friendship. LA started it, SEAL Team cemented it, and now you’re stuck with me forever. Thank you for listening to my ranting and raving and sobbing and being the first person I ever trusted to read a fic before posting it.
And to everyone else who has interacted with my posts or read my fic, thank you from the bottom of my heart. I didn’t know fandom could be like this, and it has truly been such an incredible experience because of all of you!
It seems only fitting that a show that had such a beautifully tightly knit cast has handed me the best online friendships I could ask for. The show might be over, but this definitely isn’t goodbye!
In retrospect, maybe the real NCIS LA was the friendships we made along the way...
Another fan art for a fic again😔😔😔
This one
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
they are forcingly feminizing kira in the tag. and i mean the forcing part literally. cant anyone in this fucking site be normal
Decent but generic levelled item, however it sticks out because it would've been impossible to fit anywhere on your body (holy shit an 8 foot mage staff)
omfg I love it
no makeup.....but it's selfie sunday.....bare with me
okay, so i know some of you are following someone on tumblr that i've recently had a fight with, if you aren't then okay. i'm not going to name names or give out a url because i don't do that. however if you know who i'm talking about then you deserve to know my half of the story and that i'm not the worst person in the world.
i'm gonna cover this first because this is one of the biggest things going on in these issues. call me childish or immature for having the normal functions of a human being and getting jealous. "oh my god she's jealous she's so childish and annoying." bitches please, if you pretend that you're never jealous, you are lying to yourself. no matter what you get jealous, big or small, you get jealous. i have friends on here and off here (like skype or just know more than just tumblr) that i've know for almost a year to a little more than a year. this person has found a way to waltz in and become friends with these people as well. i don't mind, they can be friends all they want. but my problem is when they follow this person and they see the things they post in their personal tag because they do not hold back what so ever. they let loose and say things that they don't even know what they're talking about. anyway, back to my fear. they follow this person and they've seen all the things they're saying about me and it's really pissing me off. sure people's opinions haven't changed about me, mainly because the shit this person's said aren't true. i'm not what they claim that i am, but that topic's going to be covered in the next tab.
point 2: poisonous and terrible friendships
yes, i guess i'm poisonous. but what am i poisonous for?
being there for this person whenever no one else was awake or just there period
listening to this person whenever they had something to say, despite popular belief i do drop things and listen to people
being the person they can trust most
getting in a couple of fights with them because that's what people do
the one person they could take everything to
just because you don't tell me everything doesn't mean i'm not listening, you can tell me anything. this person didn't think they could do that and that's stupid and childish in and of itself. if you can't trust me like you claim you do, then why bother? i'm the first person you can come to with anything. i don't tell anyone about anything you tell me because i don't believe in spreading rumours or your secrets all over the world. unless you're someone i hate, even then i don't like it. hell, my body and brain don't even like it when i lie i'm that bad.
poisonous friendships are not what ours was, at least i wasn't poisonous and i think you know it too because if i was so poisonous then why fucking talk to me? why not tell me to fuck off and leave you alone? i was always there for you!
point 3: telling friends and publicizing everything
i know for a fact that this person has gone to two of my closest friends and told them about me. how did they meet these friends? through me of course. and what does this person have the audacity to do? to lie and bitch about me behind my back to them. my best friends! i'm not going to lie and say that i haven't talked to them about you, but that's mainly because you were being a real asshole to me. and i also understand that i'm not perfect and you can bitch to anyone and anything you like, but not to my best friends, and you knew they were my best friends.
so this person is more than willing to make me look bad beyond belief, publicly on tumblr, and talk to my friends about me and it's okay. i'm not allowed to do anything else. i hate doing this. i hate it beyond everything. if we have a problem you message me, don't publicly announce me being poisonous, childish, and a bitch for being there for you for the amount of time we were friends. just because of a few fights, just because i didn't want to fight anymore. i wanted to be done with this, but you brought it up again and now i'm striking back because i'm tired of sitting here taking all these hits and blows that i don't deserve.
and don't say you don't believe i'm a bitch, because i think we all know you've made it clear that you think that. don't worry, i think you're a fucking dick for acting this way. i feel like i could say more, but this is all i'm going to say. to all those who need the other half of the fucking story.