Open-Letter to my future daughter, If I ever have one
"Wait 'till you get your own children,"
This is what my mom used to tell me and it sounds to me like it's going to be her "Sweet Revenge." I really hope you're not.
If there is really a parallel world that future is where right now, where future concurrently co-existing with this present. I am wishing that you're doing okay. I really hope that you are not usually crying in your bedroom. And trying your best to silently sob because you do not want somebody to hear it, because you do not know what to say when someone asks and it is easiest to remain silent than to make the world understand. And when you are finally ready to open up, no one listen. I really hope that is not happening to you in the future right now.
Believe me when I tell you that this world will sometimes betray you. All of your friends you trusted are not what you believe they are, no matter how much true you have been. Most of the time, they are not going to be there for you when you need them the most. People always have selfish motives. And they will always choose their motives over the friendship you offer. When you feel like the world leaves you, I promise that I will going to be your ever trustful and loyal best friend, when all of the people you believe left you, I will remain by your side. And I am willing, to give even my own life for you just to protect you.
Always remember that no matter how harsh the world to you, never, never hesitate to give love. People needed it most. So give it to everyone generously, and whole heartedly. And do not worry that you will be drain because I will always, always refill you with my love. Remember that.
But do not forget when I tell you that no matter how much love you give, only give your heart to one person who can be the same for you. And when you finally find that person whom you want to offer your heart with, never let go that person. If you ask me if I believe that there is a person that God destined to us, I will say "yes," but it is still up to us; it is still our free-will if we will choose and eagerly wait for that person destined to us. And that road is hard. And there are men, that are good at showing fake love, and sometime you will be deceive and will misunderstood them to be the 'one'. But I know you will soon determine what's true from not.
Never, never be afraid to tell the world what you want to say. There are no wrong words to utter or write, just a wrong audience that listen or a wrong reader that read. But know also that once you say a words, you can NEVER take it back and the right thing to do is to take responsibility for the words you uttered.
You will make a lot of mistake, and the world will define you with that. Learn to ignore it. I know, it will not going to be easy, you will not understand it and realize it in one day. It will take you years and sometimes a decade to learn that. But that's okay. And it's normal.
"Sorry" will going to be a big word to swallow, but will not poison you as well. And one more thing, do not forget to forgive yourself as well.
I promise to myself that I will be there for you when everything seems to be an entangled rope that will never be fix. I cannot tell you what to do, nor can I give you the right answer. But, I will give you the best advice I had learn and it is up to you to decide what is the best.
I will let you make your own decision. No one knows the right answer, for really, there is none, only a good choice. And to do that you have to take risk. Jumping to a cliff is really scary, but who knows, you might discover a paradise, if not, you will discover to survive.
Do things that scare you a little, for that will make you feel truly alive, but another but! Remember to only do things that you will never regret and your future self will thank you for.
I promise to let you explore the world, I will hold your hands not too tight, I promise to let it go when it is time. But I will keep my eyes on you. When the time come, I will let you fly as high as you can. I will give you a freedom to go to where you want to go, to be what you what to be for I know you will come back and visit me and make me proud.
There are times that you'll love me to death, and there will also come a time that you'll hate me to hell but remember I can be your worrier but at the same time I can be a warrior for you.
I will always, truly, generously, whole-heartedly, love you, protect you, and support you. Until I can, until my last breath until I'm in the world that knows you.
NOTE: I am not freaking pregnant right now! nor there is chance that I am.
