#opening chapters

[happiestplacetobe]

So I just started A Court of Silver Flames and I just have to mention that I love Rhys and Feure to infinity and beyond.

Also they are so precious must protect

[ginnyzero]

An Attention Grabbing 1st Chapter

The first chapter of a book is one of the most important things that a writer will ever write, especially if it is their first book. This along with your summary/query letter are the things that prospective readers including agents, editors and publishers are going to see first to decide whether or not they’re going to read/represent/buy/sell your book.

So, it’d better be attention grabbing and good right?

Those words have to represent your voice, your style and everything your brand is about right off the bat so if the readers and agents and editors can decide if they’re into your type of motorcycle rumbles. Or not.

A slush reader on tumblr revealed in a post that the writer has four pages to hook the reader. The agent usually at least asks for five when you submit a query. Four pages in double pace, 12 pt font is about 1000 words (give or take, five pages is about 1200.) That means the writer has 1000 words to grab the reader and keep them reading more to hope they get to the end of the chapter and want to continue on to the next one.

So, what needs to be included in a first good chapter? What needs to hook the reader?

(I’m proud of the first chapter of the Lone Prospect and pretty pleased where five pages ends off and ten pages ends off because I didn’t plan it that way, but using my own book as an example seems rather arrogant and I’m not that narcissistic. So I’m going to use a book that the first chapter grabbed me.)

The first one thousand words and the query letter of your book share a lot in common. They’re trying to catch and entice the reader to stick around and get more.

So the first thing that they have to convey is “Who is this character?’

And secondly, “What is the conflict of this story?”

Because the conflict gives us a reason to care about this character we’ve just met. If we don’t care about the conflict, then the character isn’t going to be interesting enough for us to stick around.

Thea Harrison manages to capture both character and conflict in her first sentence of Dragon Bound. Pia’s been blackmailed into a suicidal theft and she blames herself.

Interesting.

This immediately draws the reader in. What was the theft? What did she take? How is she going to get out of this? Why does she blame herself? Who did she steal from? Why did she do it? She’s the first character mentioned, by convention, she’s the main character. We are supposed to be rooting for her right off the bat.

Thea gives us some answers right away. Pia is feeling stupid and duped by a boy she used to date. A lot of females can relate to this, but most males don’t put us in such extreme situations.

Page two reveals that she stole from someone powerful and scary and that her plan is to run and hide (even if it feels futile.) And she’s on her way to make the plans to make sure that she can’t be betrayed again. Thea uses description to show Pia’s nerves and desperation.

Page three is a bit of world building that doesn’t actually go anywhere in the book so it does seem to drag a bit and then page four introduces another conflict, Pia’s mother. Apparently, Pia looks a lot like her mother and her mother was someone important in this society. Pia manages to divert the interest and by the end of the page asks for her solution to the problem of her betrayal, a binding spell.

Bang, 1000 words and we know that Pia is afraid, desperate and on the run after committing a theft. She’s got a plan and part of her plan is getting a binding spell from a witch. We can sympathize with Pia and we’re interested in what she stole and how she plans to get out of her situation.

But the binding spell solution gives the readers more questions, it drags them deeper. Given what Pia has already revealed, they know who it’s for but what type of spell it is going to be and will the shopkeeper do it. (Yes, of course, or else we wouldn’t have a story and there would be no point in going to the witch.) Then on page seven, the creature she stole from discovers the theft and Pia’s time has run out. She has to run and run fast.

Hopefully, by this point the reader is hooked enough to keep reading.

Because the point of view changes to who exactly Pia stole from.

Thea spends a good two pages explaining exactly what this creature is, when he was born and that he’s basically one of the most powerful creatures in existence and oh, by the way, he’s pissed. Oh, and he’s rich and he’s got lots and lots of resources to find Pia. He has people and he orders those people to find Pia.

But he doesn’t want the thief harmed. He’s holding something back. Why is he holding back? Not even Dragos knows. There is something so absurd about the theft. It doesn’t make sense.

The last page of the chapter, 14, finally reveals what Pia took and she left him a note.

And the last line is Dragos’ finally reaction to the absurdity of the theft and what she did and it’s completely opposite to what he should be feeling.

He laughs.

So, ends this first chapter. And the reader is left with more questions. What is Pia going to do? Will she escape? How is Dragos going to catch her? What will he do if she does catch her? What happens next? Who ordered this theft? What are they going to do once they find out what she actually stole? Wait, that’s what she stole? Why that? It’s so silly! (I like absurd premises, sue me.)

So, um, yeah, if you like fantasy romances, try Dragon Bound by Thea Harrison.

This is pretty simple staircase storytelling. Notice, I’m not saying elevator storytelling. There isn’t a cliffhanger here. All the questions asked at the beginning of the chapter have been answered. Dragos doesn’t leave off in the middle of instructions to his people. This is a self-contained bit of the story so that the reader can stop, chew over what they just read, take a little rest before going onto the next bit of story.

The reader still wants more. But they aren’t left in the middle of a critical moment with their heart in their mouth. That’s the difference between staircase and elevators.

The first chapter has to establish a good sense of the characters we’re going to be interacting with, a minor bit of relevant world building and still leave us with enough questions to keep wanting to read more of the story. As writers, we want the reader to be pulled deeper and deeper into our world the more they read of the first chapter.

So, once you as a writer start editing your first chapter or even deciding what your first chapter is going to be, ask yourself. Who are the characters? What is the conflict? Does this chapter establish the characters and have the reader asking more questions by the end of the chapter than at the beginning? And “are the important questions posed at the beginning of the chapter answered by the end of the chapter?”

And check your word counts. If you haven’t established character and conflict for at least one major character in the first 1000 words, you need to reconsider your first chapter.

Because we readers want to care about them. We really do!

[scriptstructure]

Hello! My novel is a sci-fi/mystery/adventure story, so I'm trying to pack detail into an action-oriented plot. I've rewritten my first chapter at least 5 times now, cause I feel like it's just an info dump to set the story up instead of a slow release of relevant info. But I don't really know how to do that "gracefully", per-se, in addition to the other plot stuff going on. Tips on how to do this? And is one of these pacing strategies better than the other (info dump vs. slower)? Thank you! :D

I think that [THIS POST] about introducing details via action is going to be a big help to you.

Now, I do want to take a moment to talk about why exposition dumps are generally discouraged, because I think that when you understand the reasoning behind a lot of generalised creative advice, you’ll be able to see how and why it might be useful to you and also when and where it might be good for you to disregard that advice if you want to or if you think it will have good effect.

Most of the time, we avoid exposition dumping because, while it might seem like it’s a good way to quickly get the setting and premise on the table and understood, it usually does the opposite. A lot of times exposition dumps (the Bog of Exposition, if you will), make the description and scene setting feel much slower to the reader, as there’s no action to propel them through it.

Rather than having a character experiencing the setting, and interacting with it, the reader is presented with a static scene, or a list of descriptive elements for something that they aren’t yet invested in caring about. Starting off with an exposition dump can mean that you’re not getting out of the gate with a lot of readers because it means that you’re requiring them to invest time to get through something that they’re not yet sure they even want.

By giving setting and descriptive information through action packed passages feels slower when you’re writing it because it takes longer. It’s more difficult to get the balance between description and action, to manage to hash out how the character observes the world and how it changes around them as they experience it, but for the reader it means that absorbing that worldbuilding and setting and description is much more natural and seamless, because it’s being delivered via an active agent that they can become invested in.

As well, when exposition is delivered via action, it is easier to remember. If something important happens and the reader learns a new fact about the world of the story through that event, it’s going to be a lot more memorable than if they read one fact among many in an exposition dump. When you pair action and exposition, you’re less likely to have readers having to flick back to the beginning fifteen chapters in when something you’ve established becomes relevant again.

Nathaniel Hawthorne said “Easy reading is damned hard writing” and to my experience this can be very true. 

It’s easier to write your exposition all in one big neat package, but especially at the beginning of the story, the reader often isn’t committed enough to work through it. I’m sure you’ve often read that the beginning of the story should ‘hook’ the reader, which is a difficult thing to manage as well, and which is rarely explained.

Essentially you want to make the beginning of the story do a few things: Introduce characters that the reader will be interested in seeing more about, set up a world that makes sense, and raise questions that the reader will want to find out the answer to.

Now, the opening action of the story doesn’t need to be on a level with the main action of the narrative. You can have an ‘entry’ conflict to introduce things, and to establish the world, etc. Let’s look at a couple of examples of an initial conflict that illustrates much about the world of the story, but which is connected tangentially to the main body of the narrative.

The opening chapter of Harry Potter and the Philosopher’s Stone introduces the Dursleys, and uses them as a vehicle to emphasise the strangeness of the elements of the wizarding world that are then introduced. The story of how Harry gets to the Dursley’s house and the events of that night certainly are connected with the main plot of the series, but they also provide a very small-scale conflict that contains enough action and raises enough questions to lead the reader into the rest of it.

The opening of The Fellowship of the Ring begins with the preparations for Bilbo’s eleventy-first birthday. Obviously the One Ring being part of his possessions and it being passed on as a part of the celebration is connected to the events of the rest of the series, but the birthday party preparations also give the reader the time and action to become familiar with the Shire as a setting, with the habits of hobbits, and with the idea of wizards, dwarfs, elves, and all the rest of it. 

So, generally, exposition dumps slow down the pace of the action, and can discourage readers who just want to move on to the juicy bits. By eliminating the Bog of Exposition, in favour of a action-with-exposition approach, we can break down worldbuilding and set-up into easily absorbed bites. It’s like grating vegetables into a spaghetti sauce so that fussy eaters won’t notice they’re there -- still get the vitamins, but don’t have to worry about the taste or texture of the big chunks!

I hope that helps!

–

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[coldastheclouds]

I forgot how hard opening chapters are. I keep looking back at the short story prequel I did years ago and want to expand on that rather than the ACTUAL FRIGGEN NOVEL. 

[roxori-creations]

Tainted

Prologue

I was told that they kill innocent humans for fun. That they will steal our valuables, kidnap our young and burn down our homes. This is what we’ve been taught. We’ve been told these stories all our lives to ensure we grew up hating them. It worked. Practically everyone I knew was afraid of them. All they saw were disgusting monsters with unnatural eyes, strange markings and weird features. Something that needed to be oppressed.

I was different. I found them fascinating. Imagine having ink flowing through your veins instead of blood. Imagine having a talent that you could do perfectly since you were born. Just imagine being so unique. As a child I wished to be like them, or at least to be able to befriend one of them. Unfortunately, the way I saw things changed my friends and family in the worst way imaginable. Only now do I realise my mistakes.

  Chapter 1

 The city is alight. I do not know how I got here nor do I know why it is burning; all I know is the people are suffering. Their screams echo throughout the city. The fire is consuming everything they have. And there’s no way to stop it. What should I do? Should I run while I still have a chance? Or should I try and help the poor souls who still have a chance?

A sudden shriek rips me out of my thoughts. I guess that makes it easier to decide. I frantically look around, trying to figure out where it came from. Another shriek erupts from the building to the right of me. Amber flames blaze from the shattered windows. I take in a few deep breaths and slam my shoulder into the door. Smoke engulfs me, stinging my eyes and lungs. Tears blur my vision as I try and blink them back. Damn fire.

I try to yell, ignoring the panic rising in my throat.

“Hello!? I’m here to help!” I manage to shout.

“Make some sound; any sound so I can find you!”

A small groan responds. I cautiously manoeuvre around burning timber towards the source. There is debris everywhere; some charred by the fire, others still in the process. Walking through an archway into a back room, I notice a twisted figure sprawled on the ground. A knot forms in my stomach as I see their legs are crushed by a fallen beam. The beam is no ablaze, but it is still glowing a vibrant orange. As I draw close, the smell of burning flesh tells me to act fast.

I scramble over to crouch by the figure. Here we go. I take a few breaths in and out to prepare myself. As I place my hands on the beam everything shifts around me. The walls, the furniture, the fire merge together, swirling around as if they were ink. It all becomes distorted. I no longer hear the crackling of the fire nor the screams of others just a high pitched ringing. Then I notice my hands are on the beam yet I feel...nothing. Not an ounce of pain. I remove my hands and study them. The skin is scorched red and should be agonizingly painful but it feels as if nothing has happened to them. This is impossible. The ringing gets louder, my heart thunders in my chest. What’s going on? I don’t understand. The building swirls around me making me feel queasy. I stare at the figure on the ground and... everything falls silent.

The silence does not last long as an animalistic screech erupts from the figure’s throat. The cracking of their bones can be heard as their body snaps in unimaginable ways. I shouldn’t look but I can’t seem to stop myself. Their body reforms becoming an entirely different shape. I know what’s going on. They’re shifting. It can’t be. This means they’re one of them. They’re tainted.

[brightergrey]

The prologue and chapters one to three can be found on You Write On (click the above link).