some trevorquinn nonsense under the cut because i can't stop thinking about them
i've just read two longposts about them and my brain keeps smashing them together like two atoms in the hadron collider so
you've got this essay about quinn that can basically be summarized into "it seems like everybody wants to fuck popstars and/or their wife and nobody wants to win anymore." and while this was technically before the great angst of the canucks, you do still have quinn who has wanted nothing more than hockey and to win at hockey and to succeed at hockey and hockey hockey hockey.
and then you've got this essay about trevor that can basically be summarized into "you can watch denver and porter and alex laugh and grow load bearing memories together and be the fun older guy but the part of life they’re experiencing has long passed for you."
and then you've got this essay about how nobody really took care of trevor during his rookie season and how he's trying to be better for the rookies on the flyers now. like trevor signed his contract at the start of covid and then spent his first year / season being bounced around between the gulls and the ducks during freaking covid, like all of this wasn't enough change.
and to me they both kind of boil down to the same thing: everyone else is moving on without you and moving in a separate direction from you that maybe you want to go down someday or maybe you can never go down and you're standing on the ice with your hockey stick and a hollow in your chest that nobody seems to understand and that never goes away.
and then you've got the trade angst for both of them and the feeling of... loneliness for lack of a better word. this is why i think trevorquinn to some extent works. i don't think it's like romantic, i think it's just finding someone who Gets It even if their situation is different and they're Different. like trevor and quinn convalescing at the lakehouse and realizing that maybe their lives aren't that different after all, but you've also got quinn trying his best to take care of trevor, the rookie who never really was cared for, along with trevor trying his best to be so good for quinn so that he'll be allowed to stay.
like when i think of trevor and quinn from a serious angle, i do think you've got trevor who wears his heart on his sleeve but who doesn't always admit what's really going on. like i think he gets lonely and distressed and self-loathing sometimes but he'll never tell quinn that, but he'll get really clingy and and pestery but also so so docile just for quinn and no one else. and then you've got quinn who's trying to hold it all together at all times and never admit any weakness especially to his brothers who will worry about him or people who just Don't Get It, but then it's eating him up inside because he can't fix it on his own so he just suffers.
and i think when they come together it's just a lot of full contact physical touch. mostly because trevor is absolutely a full contact guy but also because quinn needs it and usually doesn't really accept it except from those on his okay to touch list. and for me it always ends up with trevor pressed against quinn, somehow feeling very small in quinn's arms, and quinn stroking his fingers through trevor's hair and appreciating the warmth and weight of trevor against him.
(thinking about my lakehouse fic again, though that definitely got a lil silly with the actual trevorquinn)
but i do think you've got quinn taking care of trevor and trevor appreciating quinn and them finding this common ground and this mutual understanding that no one else gets or needs to know about. and for a bit, it's just the two of them at the lakehouse in this weird liminal space between seasons. and maybe it carries over when the wild play the flyers (or ducks/canucks) and it's quinn giving trevor his hotel room or inviting him over to his apartment or something and trevor being like sure i'll sleep in your guest room or something, and quinn being like nah it's fine. just come sleep in my bed and let me hold you for a bit.
and maybe it heals them both a little bit.
