#random
I always imagined there would be some sexual undertones in the relationship between Jenn and Pier, as well as some slightly (?) homoeroticism in the relationship between Mei and Izolda, but now that I think of it, I wanna make the intimacy between Jenn and Pier even more explicit. Pier's murder is arguably one of the major events in the whole story since he never really dies: he's still invading Jenn's headspace after the murder and she sees his ghost everywhere. Also five years later he is somehow resurrected (??) cause Izolda remarries with a man who looks like his identical twin.
Pier is definitely an object of desire to Jenn, although she's completely unable to identify the source of that desire ; is it the way he asserts dominance through manipulation and mind games that reminds her of her father? Is it the danger? Is it the taboo? Is it the fact she knows he's able to destroy her? Is it the power she has upon him? Is it that quiet, mature kind of virility oozing from everything he does that she wants to steal from him by killing him?
There's also a mirror game going on between Jenn and Izolda who somehow look alike despite their differences. It's like Jenn is Izolda's lost youth brought back to life. Decay has already left its marks upon Izolda's body ; wearing a mask is no longer necessary. Jenn on the other hand is like a star about to turn into a supernova, like a sharp sword wrapped up in silk. And that mirroring explains Pier's infatuation for Jenn who's got that blooming sexuality and ethereal youth while Izolda, his soulmate and life partner, has grown to be a purely intellectual creature, almost fleshless.
Having a secret to keep from Mei sure felt good to Jenn but it wasn't the reason why she wanted to get closer to Pier ; at some point she already has everything she needs to be able to reach her goal and kill him, but she chooses to dig deeper, seeking his company more than necessary.
Mei was what Jenn wanted in the first place: she liked her eyes on her, her attention made her feel alive and beautiful, or at least, worthy of being noticed. For a brief moment yeah, she recklessly thought making Mei jealous would make her feel good. Mei still has the upper hand when it comes to superficial interactions, and of course Jenn doesn't mind, she likes the taste of her venom. But she also knew things Mei didn't know, she was able to do things Mei never thought she could do although she was the first to see Jenn's "potential". Mei thought she was the one who allowed that thing between Pier and Jenn to happen, because the end justifies the means, but she would never be able to grasp the depth of their relationship quite accurately, that's why she will never fully understand why Jenn became so "different" after the murder as well ; only thing she knows is that she fell irrevocably in love with her when she saw the blood on her hands.
(this whole story reeks of incest and perversions lol I'm sorry😂)
I was actually thinking about naming that chapter of Smiles "Aberrations" obviously because it's the name of the studio ran by Mei but also because yeah it kinda fits the theme?
