#ortilanothoughts

[ortilano]

How did we grew up so fast in six months?

We took the big step forward and now I’m just too excited to see the future with you. Although the road won’t be a short one, I pray that we have a fruitful and joyful ride together. There will be a lot of challenges ahead. But with God by our side, we are secured and justified.

Kailangan na natin mas magtipid pa. Hahaha 🏠

[ortilano]

I is the most selfish word to say.

These is one of those times that I really hated myself for being insensitive with my words. I hate to see you hurt. I hate myself for making you cry for my senseless thoughts. Your feelings matters the most.

I’m sorry for being so selfish. For considering my feelings more than yours. To be loved by you is a privilege. Who am I to make those precious tears fall? I really don’t deserve you. I can’t sleep for my conscience is killing me. You are too kind to say that you are OK but I know that you aren’t.

I’m so sorry for telling you to leave me when you see me dragging you to depravity. I’m too naive to even demand something so foolish from you when I should be begging for you to stay.

And yet you stayed... I hope that you will stay even if I’m bringing you to no good. Please be patient with me for I will be always a work in progress. I hope that the day will come when I can finally say that I deserve you with all my heart. For right now you are a star in my sky while I’m just a dust that makes you cry.

[ortilano]

“In just a finger snap the plot of the story changed. In less than 3 months both Confidantes became Lead Characters of a wonderful story”...

Probably this is the greatest plot twist in my life, where in the person that I used to consult about my Valentine’s day shenanigans will also be the girl that I’ll be putting more effort on, just to see that bright smile of hers.

Yes, it was less than 3 months since We both crossed that bridge together. But see, in the past 3 months God has manifested His great works for us, giving us all the signs that we asked for and taking all the burden away from us. I can’t thank God more than enough for making all of this happen. Hence, I promise that I’ll be taking care of His princess and promise to treat her as my queen.

We are both strong individually, but together we are as stronger. You can depend on me as I depend on you. I will love you, every inches of you (that’s not a lot of inches literally 😂).

Finally, I understand what loving someone from God’s love really means. It is a love that will never cease. A love that won’t burn you with all your efforts. A love that unconditionally makes me seek the happiness of my other half.

Wow! I’ve have mentioned God many times in this entry. But I’m not ashamed or will ever be ashamed about God. For He has answered all of our prayers, hence our story started.

Let this be the first to many of those plot twists and happy moments together. I’ll never get tired of being with you. For you bring peace in my train of thoughts and you bring joy to my loner kid inside.

[ortilano]

Dance slowly

January 27

Have you ever felt like dancing slowly while listening to a song as you embrace someone?

I did.

It was the first time that I danced with someone as if the world is slowly revolving around us. While every lyrics and melodies plays in our ears, all the stars in the sky started to fall as I fall deeper and deeper into you. All the butterflies are suddenly in my stomach as if they were trying to lift me up. Euphoria is such a cheap word. Joy is underrated.

Who would have thought that this will happen to us? If this is just a dream, I don’t ever wanna wake up. But this is not just a dream and this is better than every dreams to come.

“At nakita kita sa tagpuan ni Bathala”

[ortilano]

Morning

It’s one of those morning when you wake feeling more in love to that one person. I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life waking up to those lazy saturday mornings just to cook you breakfast.

I woke up longing for your warm hugs and your endless stories that keeps us awake all night. Then I found myself smiling realizing that I want to cook breakfast for you someday and see the smile on your face as you smell the aroma of the “tuyo” that you love paired with siningag and some eggs.

I used to hate mornings because who wouldn’t love to snuggle in bed up to noon. But ever since you came, I kept looking forward to every morning to wake you up and serve you some hot chocolate drink (which you dispose half of it. Hehe). Mornings were never been this good. I hope and pray that we may wake up side by side to the remaining mornings of our lives.

[ortilano]

Have you ever...

Have you ever met someone that everytime you see that person, it feels like the world goes on a slow motion?

Have you ever met someone who supports you in your laziness on a Saturday and prefers to snuggle in the bed while the world is busy doing their Saturday leisures?

Have you ever found someone who would laugh even with your worst joke that when told to others would make you lose maybe half of your friends?

Have you ever found someone that you can grow up with your faith in this time when people only remembers God during the hardest of times?

Have you ever found someone whom you can talk to from dusk to dawn about random stories from childhood up to the silliest story about your officemate?

Have you ever found someone that you would cross all the boundaries just to buy that “manggang hilaw” just because she’s in her PMS?

Have you ever found that someone who dresses so well and looks pretty well in her makeup and yet eats like a “tambay” in your favorite isaw stand?

Have you ever found someone who wants to do the things that you’ve always wanted to do in your life that you weren’t able to do because you have no one to share those moments?

Have you ever met someone that made you feel that true love does exists and it can happen in a snap?

Have you ever met someone who’s mere presence takes all your worries away and gives you the comfort of a blanket during a cold December night?

Have you ever found someone who enjoys the rain as much as you do that even the most stormy night can be something that you’ll find joy with?

Have you ever found someone that can calm your demons by just smiling and giving you a warm embrace?

I have found that person. A person who looks too perfect in my eyes inspite of all her imperfections. A person who can make every morning worth waking up to, for the reality is so much better than your dreams.

[ortilano]

My greatest fear

I have lived a life of walking alone. It has been good, at least for the past few months. I have no fear of going to random places, losing people around, and hurting someone else. Then you came. I’ve realized that this kid who was brave enough to live alone is afraid of seeing you hurt. I’m afraid of not giving you enough assurance that I’ll be there for you the next morning you wake up after that bad dream of yours. I’m afraid to wake up one morning and realize that last night you bid your farewell. I’m afraid of the idea that while I’m trying my best of building that ladder, someone is continuously building walls around you. I am afraid of losing you.

I have never been afraid like this in my life. I guess being afraid is not too bad at all as long as it’s you. I’ll continue to work with that ladder and cross that bridge towards you. Let me take your doubts and worries away. Let me hold you tight as you face your nightmares while you sleep. Let me make you feel that not everyone who says “I love you” will leave you. Let me show you that you are more than enough despite of all your insecurities in life. Let me tell you how beautiful you are regardless if you are slaying that floor in that dress or you are in your pajamas drooling over a pillow. I want you to know that I will stick with you no matter what circumstances or challenges lies ahead. Let me be your “nag-iisang tiyak sa isang libong duda”. Let me prove to you that my love seeks no ending.

[ortilano]

As sweet as these silvanas is my girl who fought bravely against her extreme sleepiness just to hand me these sweets and her good night kiss.

Sometimes, I can’t help but think on what did I do well in this life to deserve someone like her. I thank God every time I pray for making all of these happen. My heart is full because of you.