the agony of death is a lot more than what it could be ever expressed in words, that's what the two suffered.
Warnings: character death, crying, angst.
"It is going to be okay" he said.
"I love you" he said.
"I would never leave you" he said.
"Live for me..." He said.
But how was she supposed to live for him when he wasn't even here anymore. She could still feel the sirens vibrating against her fingertips as she crawled her way upto him.
Her bloody hands desperately tugging against his shirt, trying to make him breathe again.
"l-l...live for me" it was a curse he left on her, slowly ripping away every bit of conscience left for her.
To others it may seem like a blessing, because they knew she wouldn't want to break his last wish, they knew she'd live.
It was easy for others, they could ease their hearts and have a good night's sleep knowing she'd be there.
Little did they know they lost her the day they lost him. A part of her wanted to selfishly tug away everyone's peace, to break the promise he forced her to make at the last moments of his breathing.
To her each moment was hell, she'd break down crying in the middle of eating, to others it was horrible, they were all worried for her, but only for a moment.
afterall they knew she'd live, for him.
Her cries peirced the walls everyday, begging to be killed she roamed around like a dead body. Her heart felt shattered, when she moved to her side to see the cold empty side accompanying her to sleep.
He wasn't here anymore, he wouldn't ever be here anymore. Oh how she wished she could hold him once again, oh how she wished to kiss him once again.
It was only a matter of time before she would collapse, but untill then there lived the peace of his promise snatching away even a little bit of hope for happiness from her.
"open the door, y/n. Let me in just once more, i-ik it hurts that's why I'm here to make it easy for you right? Can't you do that for me" there was a silence accompanied by his words, a loud sob echoing past the door as a reply.
He felt his heart break at the sound of her cries but he knew he couldn't take any pain away from her, afterall he was going through a lot himself. He regretted yelling at his brother to have died in the womb, he regretted not giving him the last piece of pizza everytime, he regretted screaming at him about how stupid his dream was because he never lived to fulfill it.
"f-for him, please open the door" and that was the moment he broke, his knees giving up on supporting all the heaviness he carried anymore. Their was a loud thud echoing on both sides of the door.
He felt tears well up in his eyes yet again. And there she was pulling the door open hastily.
The moment he laid eyes on her, he found himself sobbing even harder then he did at his funeral, she hadn't eaten properly for days, let alone move out of the room.
Her eyes were dark red and swollen from the whole month of pain she has endured. "Y/n" he signed his tears blurring his vision ever so slowly, he felt so helpless, so hopeless, his face shot up when he felt a tiny pair of hands hold his, her hands were rough, covered in scars from digging her nails too hard.
And when his eyes met her, a loud sob echoed in the whole house accompanied by her hiccups, her eyes seemed to have dried out. There was nothing but a strange emptiness in her eyes, which made him cry even harder.
His strong arms pulling her up to his chest, letting himself sob into her hair. He could feel her trembling against him but she said nothing, letting him cry his heart out.
"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry" she repeated soon tearing up again her eyes stinging at the sudden intrusion. She sobbed again her hands clinging onto his shirt hard enough to make it crumple against her grasp.
She sobbed a series of I'm sorry to which he just hugged her tighter. He regretted ever fighting with her and letting her dash out of the house and she blamed herself for walking so blinded by anger.
They both blamed themselves.
He remembered how the three of them bickered around, blackmailing osamu that he'd tell y/n about the very long time crush he had on her to take the bigger portion of food.
How osamu got jealous and made out with her right in front of him when you both first came out to him, for he grabbed her by her waist telling him how she was his bsf first.
Everything fell down that night, the way you both screamed at each other, it was horrible. You dashed out of the house sooner than he expected, and osamu ran behind you, atsumu only coming out when he heard a loud crash. And there he stood at his door to see his bsf sitting on the ground with his brother in her arms, she cried and cried and cried for as long as he remembered after that.
They both did not talk, more like she refused to, feeling too guilty to show him her face after snatching his twin away from him. And he felt guilty for everything, they both were so deep in guilt they found themselves forgetting how much they needed each other, untill one day, he heard from his mother how y/n had refused to get out of her room since past 3 days.
Before he knew he was banging against her room door, sreeching at her to open up.
Maybe the storm inside both of their hearts stopped when they saw each other again.
They both cried for hours, before she fell asleep for the first time in a month without sleeping pills forced down her throat by her older brother for she refused to co-operate at all.
He sighed out in relief slowly hoisting her even lighter than before body up in his arms, he laid her down on her bed, sitting down next to her.
Maybe when she wakes up again this would end, maybe the horrible reality they lived in would give them both a small moment of peace, maybe they would live afterall.
Maybe it'll really be okay just like he said.
Hello you all, well idk why i wrote this just had to ig. I hope you all like it, also my exams would start soon and as you all know I'm not that active anymore, but I'd be more frequent with the posts right after my exams end. I'm sorry for being so inactive 😭😭😭
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EXTRA ! miya osamu x fem! reader. 800 words. original characters.
A LITTLE RECAP . . .
“Hello, everyone. We apologize for not responding to any letters this month, as we have something very important to discuss before the situation can get any worse. The letter that (L/N) (Y/N), who you may recognize as Dating-san, was supposed to answer for this month’s newsletter was an anonymous letter, even though it is obviously written by Miya Osamu, editor Asai Kanako’s boyfriend. It was, unfortunately, not a follow-up letter about how to treat her well and act like a good boyfriend, but rather, a letter in which he expresses Asai’s toxic traits as a girlfriend and wishes to break up with her. And (L/N) was to give advice to him, even though she was the one that brought the two of them together.
We have a pool of letters that we as a newspaper club come and agree to choose together for (L/N) to write, but it seems like this month (L/N) went ahead and decided to choose her own letter to write for. She wanted to break up the relationship between Asai and Miya, and, even more, she wanted to expose the non-existent toxic traits of Asai as a girlfriend using Miya’s letter. This plan of hers obviously backfired, since all her measly little response came out to be an attempt to break the two apart and a way to get with Osamu, the one guy she’s liked since her first year. Yes, (L/N) sacrificed her crush on Osamu to bring him with the girl that he liked. However, her own selfishness caused her to write a response for Osamu’s letter, all so she could have Osamu for herself.
Explain yourself, Dating-san.
EXPLAINURSELF(L/N)!”
(Y/N) kicked the dust under her feet as she walked home straight away after school. She shoved her hands into the pockets of her blazer, looking down as she didn’t want to make any contact, physical or of the eye, with anyone that went to her school. (Y/N) felt utterly embarrassed with herself.
When the bell rang that day, (Y/N) stood up and made her way towards the newspaper club room to explain herself. Osamu watched her as she swiftly left the classroom, not acknowledging the sniffles and what looked like a stray tear coming from her. He became awfully aware of the newspaper carefully folded in his book bag, wishing he hadn’t shown her the article.
(In a way, he was glad that he had, for she would have had to see it at one point. It was better now than later, he thought.)
(Y/N) opened the door to the club room, where Saki Akihiro, dubbed the “Demon Chief Editor,” sat staring at his computer. By his posture angled towards the door it almost looked like he was waiting for her. He tore his gaze away from the screen and bore his eyes into (Y/N), sweating more from the anxiety of being outed by Asai than from the running she had to do to get to the club room.
“(L/N). Come closer.”
She inched closer, straight expression adorning her face, not wanting to let any sign of fear show through.
“Closer. I’m not going to bite you, (L/N). Look at my screen.”
She walked towards Akihiro, who had his eyes glued back on his screen, which displayed the most recent article for Dating-san Helps Inarizaki High!, the article which tore (Y/N)’s high school reputation apart. Her heart sunk, knowing even from the moment she set foot in the club room that Saki was to scold her, maybe even reprimand her, about the article.
“Aki-san, I can explain,” you stuttered out loud, trying to give yourself the chance to show that Asai was painting you as the villain in this story.
“What explaining is there that needs to be done? What ever this is,” Aki motioned towards the screen, “This call-out article, so to speak, has pretty much explained everything I need to know.” (Y/N) swallowed dryly, and she felt like her breathing was getting heavier by the second. He paused, taking off his glasses. (Y/N) felt her heart stop-- everyone in the newspaper club knew that when Aki took off his glasses he was angry. Like, really angry.
“(Y/N), this article here makes us look bad as a club, you see? I know that Asai wrote that letter. It’s obvious. However, she is one of my most trusted editors. She is very well-respected in our club and performs very well as an editor and a member of our team. And, for your own personal good, I can’t have someone who’s not performing well on our team. I’m going to have to ask you to resign as Dating-san. At least for a couple months. I’ll let everyone else know that you’re just taking a hiatus. Alright?”
She nodded.
“Thank you for understanding, (Y/N). I’ll see you around some time. Take care,” Aki said as she left with her head hung low, embarrassment pressing it down like the burden it is.
It pressed on her neck even further, later at night when she sat at her desk doing schoolwork. She put her head down, giving her eyes a rest. (Y/N) groaned, suppressing the sob she was about to let out.
Pushing the embarrassment away, (Y/N) stood up and took a walk around her room. The destination became her soft bed, jumping on it and sighing into the plush pillow. After grabbing her phone, she wrapped the blanket around her and turned on the phone to find herself about to call the one person she looked up to the most.
She was inspired by him ever since she was a young age. He was currently in high school, a reputable, well-known young man, when she was in her third year of middle school. The two of them were very close with each other; it was a respectful relationship, with (Y/N) always looking up to him in awe. To her, he was wise, all-knowing, even. He often had the right thing to say; the witty things he said made her chuckle, impressed with his words. He was someone that (Y/N) wanted to be when she was older.
He was her cousin, Dating-san.
(Y/N) pressed the call button on her phone, holding it up against her ear as it rang several times before he picked up.
“Hey, (Y/N)-chan. It’s been a while. How’re you?”
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