Hello! We know all of our OSHA blogs have been dead for like, nearly two years at this point. But lately we've been feeling really nostalgic.
It's weird to say, but we made our first roleplay blog, eviloshaintern (now chaososha), when we were like... 12. Wayyy too young to be on Tumblr, we know. But it was a source of comfort for us (no wonder we made twenty of them). It was kind of our escapism tactic from the real world, shitty home life (which we still have, we're just better at managing it and not wanting to die about it anymore).
The point is, we were thinking about maybe reviving or rebooting one or two of them for a little while, because we think there's still some joy left in all of it. We truly loved writing for it, even if rarely anything ever got finished and it's kinda dead now as a 'fandom'. We're a bit better at self management now, and maybe this time around we won't get so burnt out about it.
So, here's a poll. yes, they're in pairs, it's the only way we could fit all of them.
Which of our OSHA blogs should we revive? Maybe around Christmas?
*A strange, wooden door has popped up in the middle of a hallway on the 4th floor. It’s pretty average for a doorway, with the exception of strange red paint on it saying “DO NOT OPEN”.*
The "Codex of Regulations" is the holy text for the Galvanist Assembly. Each page includes the Regulation handed down from the Titans themself, written in blood-red ink. Surrounding this divine text is the commentary from the various assemblies that have met over the years to interpret these regulations, allowing the faithful to truly understand the Regulations they are bound to uphold for the good of society. Transcribed below the readmore.
“Their roofs shall be marked by colored pennants to keep the people safe” -Titan Osha, Guarantor of Safety
Small pennants, made of fabric, shall be placed along the borders of the roof along all edges. "Marked" implies a complete separation and must follow the whole edge of where the roof begins and walls end. This is consistent with other regulations which encourage thoroughness and complete clarity. Little must be left to chance. - First Assembly of Chicago
"Their roofs" makes no distinction between the grandest temple, a mighty fortress, or an insignificant hovel. All roofs that shield the faithful must be marked by these sacred pennants. Any building that provides shelter and a safe place to rest must bear these pennants. -Coronation Assembly of Owen Guin
As a marker, these pennants must be visible to all people so that the faithful can be identified. They must be flown on the outside of the building then, and shall be brightly colored so they are not mistaken for the walls they mark. The pennants are triangular in shape, their size depending on the size of the building. For every ten feet of height the building possesses, the pennant shall be ten inches long and half that in the width of the base. No pennant shall be less than ten inches long and five inches across the base. -Third Assembly of Chicago
The colors of the penants shall be the sacred colors the Titan Osha uses for her markers. Red shall protect from fire and flame. Yellow and black together will keep them safe from hazards unseen. Yellow alone shall keep their paths clear and their purpose known. Orange shall be used to insure the Titans inspect the building and keep their vigil over it. -First Assembly of Detroit
The pennant's primary purpose is to "keep the people safe" and as such, prior commentaries about where they must be flown are insufficiently broad. It is not just homes, but places of work and worship, storage and sale. All buildings must be bordered by these sacred pennants. -Tenth Assembly of Pittsburgh
As the purpose of these flags is "to keep the people safe" if the faithful live in a place of heathens and such demonstrations of the faith would be dangerous, the flags should not be flown. Only the faithful can know their own safety and so none should be condemned for refusing to fly the pennants. -Second Assembly of Cincinnati
While no individual should be judged for choosing not to fly the pennants, the community as a whole should be judged. Does our faith not encourage solidarity and community? If one does not feel safe, why have they been excluded from the protection of the faithful? If one does not have the funds or materials for the pennants, where is the charity of their neighbors? -Engineer Jakub’s Commentary
Howdy. I’m the Auditor. It’s come to the attention of my bosses that there has been significant waste of resources recently, all billed to the Occupational Safety and Health Administration. They’ve sent me to see just what the deuce is going on, and I must say these initial reports are troubling. Eldritch monsters, time travel, god like beings, demons? This ain’t the SCP Foundation!
Y’all can expect an auditing in the near future whether you like it or not. Same goes for all the other “blogs” claiming to be part of the “Oshaverse” whatever that means. I couldn’t find all of them.
(ooc: hi. i am likely to be slow to respond, so please be patient.
edit: i took a look at the oshaverse tag and my god it’s even worse than i thought i’d be tagging people for *days*)
We are Evil OSHA. A distinct entity in a sea of similar organisations. We specialise in nefarious deeds, evil acts, and occasional safety violations.
We are wise in ancient ways and long forgotten deeds. Rummage through these hallowed halls of safety guidelines and broken PPE enough and you may find the answers to, well, I'm really not at liberty to say.
( @osha-janitor @osha-embroidery-department @oshafileclerk you done have to respond straight away, this could last a week and i wouldn't mind shsgbshs /lh)
