#outoftheshadows;

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@fcrgetfully

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a lil fic about vylad Suffering™

Fairytales didn't happen often and not many people got to experience them. Garroth and Aphmau, despite everything they had been put through in their short lives, were two of those lucky few. They loved each other, truly, and nothing would ever change that.

Not even when Garroth had to inevitably return to O'khasis to take his place as lord after the death of his father. Aphmau went with him and Vylad followed. Garte might have not treated him well in his life, but he was there for his brother's support, not for their father.

Aphmau had only been to O'khasis a few times, but as Garroth's wife, she stayed in the castle where he and Vylad had been born. Vylad couldn't bear to sleep in his old bedroom so he slept on a sofa in one of the parlors.

It was a cold place, finely decorated and royal, but empty. Garte had been the only permanent resident and most of the workers had been let go many years ago when the heirs of O'khasis had disappeared, one by one. Their mother was long dead.

Garroth was aware he would have to move here. No matter if his wife was the lord of her village, his own was more prominent and took precedence over hers. He couldn't very well rule O'khasis from a million miles away.

Vylad said he would help. He was always willing to help. In that moment of intimacy with his brother, Garroth had almost cried, his voice shaking when he hugged him and thanked him.

It wouldn't be easy on Aphmau either; Vylad had already taken that into consideration. She couldn't live here with Garroth because of the Phoenix Alliance; she had to go home. This could detrimental, seeing as they had only been married for a short time.

And Vylad couldn't be in two places as once. Garroth and Aphmau were the only people he loved that were still of this world, but he couldn't be there for both of them. 

Garroth had told him to take care of Aphmau when they went home; he would be fine and he would write to them.

This was 6 months ago.

Aphmau took time to visit O'khasis a few times here and there, but it was hard. Vylad had moved in with her, almost taking his brother's place because the woman wouldn't eat or sleep like she was supposed to if she was busy. He couldn't bear to see her in poor health.

Along with her husband's new position came the stress of being a lord's wife. The pressure to abandon her lordship to solely be his partner, to move to O'khasis, to have children. That was possibly the worst and the most important.

She didn't like talking about it with Vylad and he could respect that; that was a very intimate subject that should be reserved for her and Garroth, but Garroth wasn't there and Vylad was. Sometimes she couldn't help, but talk about things she really shouldn't just because Vylad would listen and not judge.

About 2 months after her most recent trip to O'khasis, she was violently sick while tending to the garden outside one morning. Vylad had put her to bed and catered to her until she felt better, but looking back, he should have seen what it was. He was stupid not to realize.

Vylad was the first she told. She was pregnant with Garroth's child, about 3 months along when she finally confessed. All the illness and the slight pudge to her abdomen finally made sense.

'When did you find out?' he was sitting on the sofa inside their shared house, hands folded politely over his lap, but his expression really couldn't be described as happy.

"I...kind of expected it. We tried. People in O'khasis were starting rumors I was unable to have children." Aphmau didn't look distraught, just despondent, almost ashamed of herself for having given into the pressure of the people her husband now ruled over. 

A hand was resting on her stomach protectively. No matter the circumstances that came about their child being conceived, Vylad always assumed one day they would have children and they would love them with all their might. He just thought preparing himself for this for so long would mean he wouldn't be upset.

'Garroth doesn't know?'

"No. I think writing him about it would be a bit rude. I'll leave for O'Khasis in a few days." She paused, studying Vylad's face for a moment, in which he turned his head, suddenly intimidated. "Vylad. Are you alright?"

'I'm perfectly fine.'

"You look...sad." She had always had a way of reading people, even if sometimes she was painfully oblivious. She could always see when someone was upset.

'I'm fine. I'll accompany you to O'khasis. It'll be nice to see Garroth again and see his reaction.' He stood abruptly and went into the bedroom, hoping packing would get his mind off such things he shouldn't be thinking about. But Aphmau persisted and followed him.

"Vylad, I've always been honest with you. Don't you think I deserve honesty from you?" It didn't sound so demanding as it might have been. She stood in the doorway awkwardly, watching Vylad pull a bag out from under his bed. He stopped when she spoke and leaned against the bed, avoiding her gaze.

'...Aphmau, it's nothing. I'm happy for you and my brother. That is entirely honest.'

"I can tell that. But there's something else," the woman stepped into the room and sat at the foot of the bed, glancing at him cautiously. "You let me vent to you. So vent to me."

He wanted to badly to tell her no, to find some excuse to leave the room and get away from all of this, but he couldn't, his mind wasn't working. He had kept his feelings to himself for so long, it was instinctual, he didn't know how to tell her. He felt like his chest would explode at this rate.

The man finally raised his head, staring into the auburn eyes peering at him from the end of the bed. He stepped over and sat beside her.

'Do you know why I ran from you?' he asked. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Ran from me?"

'All those years ago in the forest. And when I left Levin at your doorstep that night.' He felt like he was shaking, but his hands were steady. Aphmau was quiet for a moment, considering what he meant.

"I figured you didn't want Garroth to find out you were still alive. Not yet anyway."

'You're not entirely wrong.' He turned his head to look at the wall, eyes heavy. 'But that wasn't the main reason. I was scared of...seeing you. Scared of speaking to you.'

"But...why?" Brushing her black hair back, she only looked more confused, "I chased you that day because I wanted to talk to you. I mean...we're friends now. I don't see why it would have been different then."

She was oblivious. Just as she had always been all those years Garroth tried to win her affection. She wasn't too good at picking up on those types of things, it seemed.

Vylad drew in a slow, somber breath, fists clenched at his sides for a moment. 'That had been the first time I saw you. You were a stranger, as I was to you, but the moment I laid eyes on you, I felt such...intense emotions.' He shook his head, closing his eyes now. 

'I'm a shadow knight. We're not supposed to feel those feelings. I had been conditioned not to, but I did. I was so confused and scared, I ran away.'

Her eyes softening, the lord's mouth twitched into a frown, realization dawning on her as her shoulders slumped down. He had...loved her?

"But you...came back. With Levin. Why?"

'I was in no place to care for a child and at that point, I was already a traitor to the Shadow Lord. If I was discovered, they would have killed him. So I left him with you, the most innocent person I could think of.'

He glanced up at her, trying desperately to judge her expressions. 'I realize now that was selfish, forcing a child on you, but...I suppose it did work out.'

"How can you describe that as selfish? You saved him," her voice was sad, "I... Why..."

'I did what I had to do. I saw Garroth in Phoenix Drop, saw how he looked at you in just the short amount of time you had been there.' Vylad stood up, feeling so anxious he needed to move around.

'He was helplessly in love with you. I realized then, it wasn't in my future to be your lover. My life's reason was to help defeat the Shadow Lord, not to be your partner. That was my brother's.'

Aphmau had been rendered speechless, staring at him weakly. There wasn't anything she could really say, no way to object that would make it better. After a moment, Vylad gave her a gentle smile.

'But that's alright. I knew you and Garroth would be happy together. I would put my brother's happiness over mine any day. And you...you're Irene. It wasn't meant to be my place. I would never pursue something like that, no matter what my emotions tell me.'

It sounded so depressing. She wanted to tell him his emotions were valid, but this was about herself. And she was now married and pregnant. She couldn't say she ever felt the same for Vylad, but she wanted him to be happy nonetheless.

"I...I don't know what to say," she stuttered.

'That's fine. I suppose it had been long enough that I needed to tell you so there isn't anything between us.'

They sat in silence for a while before Aphmau stood up, eyes conveying her pity.

"You're so good to me, Vylad. I love you, as my friend. And Garroth is lucky to have such an amazing brother. I'm sorry how things have been for you." 

Before Vylad could interject that everything was alright and she had no reason to be sorry, the woman had her arms around him in a tight hug. He hesitated just for a moment before he returned it.

His heart still hurt despite all of his confessions, but he somehow felt lighter. Emotions were ridiculous, he had learned that a long time ago. But Aphmau and Garroth were happy and they would have a child soon. He could be happy for that.

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vylads turned into a philosophical cryptid who lives in the woods and im fine with that

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Everything ((I mean TECHINALLY its one word therefore counts as one thing right?)) ~ V

((thank u im glad people like how i write vylad considering it’s so far from the canon))

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(I love your blog almost as much as a love u)

((Blushu)

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((whoever keeps sending me anons i love u))