May 3, 2015
Heavy Gloom - The Story So Far
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Heavy Gloom - The Story So Far
I really fuckin' miss,
When roleplay was actually fun. Don't get me wrong, I still enjoy it now-- or else I obviously wouldn't have this account. When I first came into tumblr rp, it was actually very fun and it's why I ended up leaving rpm and so on and so forth. It was hard to keep up on the dash cause there were several people interacting, joking around, and others having their more serious threads. It wasn't a drag to reply, or respond, it was-- nice, flowing and enjoyable.
Somehow, the fun vanished. After speaking to only one other about this, it makes me wonder if I'm the only one.
I miss when directories weren't too literate, or too illiterate. I miss when the family wasn't so emphasized, cause it wouldn't succeed from that point. I miss when I'd look at the dash, see the family interacting with one another and it was even hard to keep up with conversations at that point, but you kept going cause it was a nice escape from reality and you were having too much fun to even get up cause you'd miss some action.
I miss when I was eager to do replies, I would always be laughing, and the dash didn't make me want to gag, vomit, or log out within a minute or two.
It seems like all the directories try to implant family, and the members just don't cooperate. It's quite difficult, and frustrating.
Roleplay just... is not as fun as it used to be. And it's a shame that it isn't. It's about which themes are the best, it's about who is literate and who isn't, it's transitioned into something-- that lacks heart. At least, for me, it lacks heart. It lacks the joy.
Which fuckin' sucks.
jojo educated me on what the activity thing can do
i'm learning
yippee kay yay
50 questions.
1: What would you name your future daughter?
Kyler!
2: Do you miss anyone?
Sort of, but when I really think about it... I miss what I had, rather than the person.
3: What if I told you that you were pretty?
I would probably blush a bit and then say, "I fucking know I am you faggot" and also add that I'm a princess.
4: Ever been told “it’s not you, it’s me”?
Haha. Yeah.
5: What are you looking forward to in the next week?
Already answered.
6: Did you go out or stay in last night?
Stay in last night, luckily. I missed being in my own bed.
7: How late did you stay up last night?
Uh... Almost 5 am, actually. I haven't been able to sleep well the past while.
8: Honestly, has anyone seen you in your underwear in the past 3 months?
Yes. Fany has. I'm also the Resident Nudist, so--
9: What were you doing at 12:30 this afternoon?
Barely waking up and probably getting food.
10: Have you ever told somebody you loved them and not actually meant it?
Unfortunately yes. It was an extremely rushed relationship and I felt pressured.
11: Could you go for the rest of your life without drinking alcohol?
... Yes, but it would be really difficult cause who doesn't like some wine every now and then?
12: Have you pretended to like someone?
Nah. Not that I can remember at least.
13: Could you go the rest of your life without smoking a cigarette?
Definitely yes.
14: Is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?
... Heh. Yeah. A certain California girl that I'm dating.
15: Is it hard for you to get over someone?
Depends on the relationship. I've gotten over people relatively quickly, but it's taken me a long time to fully get over my last serious relationship.
16: Think back five months ago, were you single?
Hahaha. Yeah.
17: Have you ever cried from being so mad?
I always cry when I'm angry enough.
18: Hold hands with anyone this week?
Mhm. I like to hold her hand, actually.
19: Did your last kiss take place in/on a bed?
... I don't remember?
20: Who did you last see in person?
Fany! She kind of.. Lives with me after all.
21: What is the last thing you said out lot?
.. out lot? Like, out loud? If so, it's "shut up".
22: Have you kissed three or more people in one night?
Honestly I don't remember, but I'd like to say no cause I don't smooch everybody--
23: Have you ever been to Paris?
No, but I would like to. I can sing the oscar meyer song in French, so might as well sing it in Paris!
24: Are you good at hiding your feelings?
To a certain extent. I'm not that great at hiding things from Fany cause she's kind of my diary.
25: Do you use chap stick?
Oui, oui.
26: Who did you last share a bed with?
The person I share a bed with every night. Hwang Miyoung.
27: Are you listening to music right now?
Yup! Tonight Alive's most recent album, actually.
28: What is something you currently want right now?
... I refuse to say it due to the fact that it is explicit.
29: Were your last three kisses from the same person?
Yes.
30: How is your heart lately?
Already answered.
31: Do you wear the hood on your hoodie?
... Most of the time, no.
32: When was the last time a member of the opposite sex hugged you?
.. I don't remember. I think earlier, maybe not. My memory's so bad--
33: What do people call you?
Tae, Taeng, Taeyeon... Any variation of that.
34: Have you ever wanted to tell someone something but didn’t?
Yes. Happens a lot, actually.
35: Are there any stressful situations in your life?
Right now? Currently yes.
36: What are you listening to right now?
Hell and Back by Tonight Alive.
37: What is wrong with you right now?
Hormones.
38: Love really is a beautiful thing huh?
It depends really. There are many different... sides to "Love". There is the love that can't be returned, that isn't mutual, and is painful. There is the love shared between family members that provide support. There is the love between friends that grow to a friendship that's everlasting.
Then there is a love that will shit on every little bit of love you have felt before.
A love so unique, so electrifying-- you can't mistake it for something else.
That love is a beautiful love, that only so many people can dream of feeling. So not all Love is... Beautiful.
39: Do you make wishes at 11:11?
Already answered.
40: What is on your wrists right now?
Nothing.
41: Are you single/taken/heartbroken/confused/waiting for the unexpected?
I'm completely taken. And it makes me overjoyed.
42: Where did you get the shirt/sweatshirt you’re wearing?
.. From the store?
43: Have you ever regretted kissing someone?
HA. Yes.
44: Have you hugged someone within the last week?
Mhm! I have.
45: Have you kissed anyone in the last five days?
Yes, cause it's hard for Fany and I to not end up smooching one another daily. Oops.
46: What were you doing at midnight last night?
Hell if I remember. Probably harassing Tiffany, laughing with Joon and talking with Twin.
47: Do you miss the way things were six months ago?
Already answered.
48: Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone?
It depends. Most of the time-- with someone else. Specifically, Hwang Miyoung.
49: Have you ever been to New York?
Nope! Surprisingly.
50: Think of the last person who said I love you, do you think they meant it?
... Yes. They did, actually.
To my amazing, darling Twin...
You don't get how much joy I actually feel knowing you legitimately just did something for me. You didn't have to-- you really didn't have to go out and put in the work to pay for something, and none the less... Get a game for me.
For someone who has given me endless support for at least a year, who has provided smiles, laughter, and a shoulder-- and to even spoil me with something that wasn't necessary...
I want you to know that I thank you from the bottom of my heart for actually keeping your word on things. ; ;
And that I wILL TITTY FUCKING HUNT FOR SOMETHING AT THE CONVENTION I PROMISE I WILL GET YOU SOMETHING CAUSE I WANNA GET YOU SOMETHING CAUSE YOU'RE FABULOUS AND PERFECT AND I'M TEARING UP AT YOU AND UGH--
I love you.