#pallas.rtf

[spriteofmushrooms]

As a Jiang Cheng fan, it's important to remember that MXTX made him squishable and baby, and that she said "if you don't like grumpy gussies, I don't want to know you," and that she said in interviews that he's only 10cm tall and perfect also.

[spriteofmushrooms]

Sorry.

[spriteofmushrooms]

AN: hi guys ^-^ i don't like how lz was beaten so i changed it hehe!! ummmm this is a lemon don't like don't read!!! i don't own my bb lz or any of his icky family, all credit to our lady mxtx!! i do own one direction tho o.o

Lan Qiren said, "Wangji, the elders sold you to One Direction."

OMG, Lan Wangji thought. "OMG, Shufu."

"If you had did your chores and not beat up great great grandma I could have blocked the sale or at least got you to go to Lady Gaga," Lan Qiren smoothed his goatee angrily with anger

Lan Xichen said, :bUt Wangji is a baby. A little angel. It's that Wei Wuxian's fault, Shufu."

Lan Qiren tugged his goatee. That meant the argument was over.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Liam Niall Harry and Zayn smirked at Lan Wangji and he felt like a stupid temple girl. Louis grimaced sympathetically. Then Harry said, "too good for laundry, innit?"

"That's not how innit is used," Louis corrected gently. His eyes are so warm or perhaps cool, the author doesn't know what he looks like even though they just looked up members one direction.

Zayn laughed meanly. "If you're in love with this twink, just say so, Louis."

They glared at each other homoerotixally while Lan Wangji blushed cutely. Then Lan Wangji tripped. Oh he's sooo clumsyyyy

But... Louis caught him (=>_<=)!!!

~~~~\\~~~~~~~~~

"I used to pluck at a guqin, but I'm not a real musician like you, Louis," Lan Wangji murmured demurely

"I can teach you," said the older man. "My guqin teacher came from the Moling Su sect, so no one could be better."

Wow, rhe Moling Su sect!!! Everyone knew they were thy greatest guqin musicians in the whole world.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

The End... for now!!!!!

[spriteofmushrooms]

Under what circumstances would Cheng-Cheng get an abortion?

Here there be mpreg and abortion discussion.

Due to my clear vision, I know that Jiang Cheng would LOVE to be a mother. However, I believe he would have an abortion when his life circumstances weren't safe for a baby.

In canon, he would choose an abortion from the moment Lotus Pier was sacked to the day Wen Ruohan died. Depending on how dire their chances of survival were during rebuilding, this no-baby period would likely extend for several years. He would feel much safer once Jin Guangshan died, so likely then.

Personally, I believe that Jiang Cheng would be fine being a single mother, so even if he was pregnant from an ex or situationship, he would continue the pregnancy. However he would absolutely not tell the father. Fuck that guy. That's HIS baby; he made it, alright?

[spriteofmushrooms]

Lan Sizhui.

[spriteofmushrooms]

Jiang Cheng is feeling Sad.

After Jin Ling finally goes to sleep, Jiang Cheng sits and stares at the feelings flashcards that Jin Ling's therapist had suggested. Stupid. Who needs those.

Shuffling through them, he turns over Sad. A colorful cartoon cries up at him.

Jiang Cheng is feeling Sad. It's okay to be Sad. When you feel Sad, you can hug a friend (ha) or tell a trusted adult (ha). You can write down why you feel Sad. (Obvious.) Some people like to listen to sad songs or watch sad movies when they feel Sad, and some people like to run and play in order to stop feeling Sad. Both are okay. It's okay that Jiang Cheng feels Sad.

Stupidly, repeating what the baby therapist says to Jin Ling in his own head makes him feel calmer.

He should clean. He should work out. He should go to sleep.

But for now, in the dark of their one-bedroom apartment where Jiang Cheng sleeps on the couch and the dishwasher doesn't work, Jiang Cheng is feeling Sad, and that's okay.

[spriteofmushrooms]

Au where wen zhuliu becomes jiang cheng's bodyguard

[on ao3]

The puppies tumbled over Jiang Cheng's lap, each trying to give him kisses. Their bellies were round with milk, and they still didn't know how to play like big dogs could. But that was okay, because Jiang Cheng would teach them.

"Little Love, Jasmine, Precious, be careful! You're going to fall out of my lap!" Jiang Cheng picked up each and gently set them down, but they kept returning. Frustrated, Jiang Cheng snapped, "No! Bad puppies!"

At the loud sound, the dogs flinched and looked around, seeming more confused than ever.

"Is something wrong, Jiang-gongzi?"

Zhao Zhuliu had recently joined the sect. He was tall and looked older than most adults Jiang Cheng knew other than the aunties and uncles who sold food by the docks. He always wore gloves and didn't smile. Because Jiang Cheng was a stupid baby, his mother had decided that Zhao Zhuliu would be his bodyguard. Jiang Cheng hated it. Only useless boys like Jin Zhen needed bodyguards.

But he did need help.

"We have to go see a-jie, but I can't carry them all," Jiang Cheng said.

Expressionless, Zhao Zhuliu replied, "I will carry two."

Jiang Cheng wasn't sure if bodyguards knew anything about dogs, so he picked up Little Love and showed Zhao Zhuliu how Jiang Yanli had shown him how to carry puppies. "They're really small and get scared easily," he said sternly, "so you can't move too quickly. You have to support their whole body, but don't hold them like a cat, because they might jump down and hurt themselves. And you have to be nice to them."

"I will," Zhao Zhuliu said.

Little Love and Jasmine were more adventurous than Precious, so Jiang Cheng handed them one at a time to Zhao Zhuliu. It was funny to see the wiggly puppies in his black gloved hands, but they seemed comfortable there. Jasmine even started licking Zhao Zhuliu's wrist.

Holding Precious like a baby, Jiang Cheng led the way to Jiang Yanli's courtyard where she learned girl things like illusion dances. Along the way, Jiang Cheng explained that these puppies were very smart, because they were farm dogs who protected sheep from tigers and yao. "The farmer said they think they're part of the flock, and sometimes when a sheep is taken they track it down, and they come back covered in blood because they're good dogs, and the sheep cuddle with them because they love them. We don't have any sheep, though."

After a moment of silence, Zhao Zhuliu asked, "Earlier, when you yelled, were you worried?"

Jiang Cheng could feel his shoulders curving in. "Yes, Zhao-shishu."

"Dogs can't understand Chinese, so they don't know why you yelled. You have to think like a dog. Puppies are still babies, and they understand even less than adult dogs. You're much older than they are, so it's your responsibility to show them how to act. How else could you have showed them what you wanted?"

Jiang Cheng slowed down. That was the most he had ever heard Zhao Zhuliu say. For the rest of the walk, he offered examples of how he could better train the puppies while Precious tried to eat his hair.

———

Father picked up Wei Ying even though he never picked up Jiang Cheng except three times. Wei Ying was crying over nothing and Jiang Cheng couldn't have his puppies anymore and Father was walking away. Two disciples Jiang Cheng couldn't recognize through his tears had already picked up his puppies and they weren't doing it right because nobody cared about his puppies at all.

Zhao Zhuliu knelt before Jiang Cheng. "Xiao-gongzi, do you trust me?"

Looking up through his tears, Jiang Cheng studied Zhao Zhuliu's face. He still looked old, but his expressions weren't as scary now that he didn't look blank all the time. Jiang Cheng didn't think Zhao Zhuliu hated him even though Jiang Cheng had thrown a tantrum when he was assigned a bodyguard, and he knew that Zhao Zhuliu knew about dogs, and even liked his puppies.

"Y-yeah," Jiang Cheng sobbed.

"I will find a flock for Precious, Jasmine, and Little Love to protect. They're going to have a lot of sheep friends, Xiao-gongzi."

"Can I visit them?"

"Zongzhu and Yu-furen will determine that," Zhao Zhuliu said.

Jiang Cheng knew what that meant. He cried harder.

"Xiao-gongzi," Zhao Zhuliu said, then started again. "Jiang Cheng, I will return as soon as I find them a home. I swear it."

Jiang Cheng wanted to say they already had a home, or that he would run away with them, but both would be petulant and stupid. He nodded. When Zhao Zhuliu gestured sharply at the two disciples, they brought the puppies to Jiang Cheng so he could say goodbye. "Be good, be good," he whispered, kissing the soft fur on their heads.

[spriteofmushrooms]

please please share your xicheng visions with us (if any) (Icame from the abo fic i went nomnomnom on it yesterday so much love for it)

Thank you so much! The problem is that my xicheng visions are essentially fueling my need to write Echoing, so I feel like if I describe it I would lose steam, if that makes sense?

But basically:

Lan Xichen needs someone who can forgive flaws and who will let him be silly and imperfect. He has Mommy Issues (I saw it with my crystal ball, and also the fact that manhua Lan-furen looks exactly like manhua Jiang Cheng). He needs someone nurturing, someone strong. Someone he can trust with absolute certainty will not betray his confidence or ruin his reputation.

I personally LOVE that novel Lan Xichen is a secret hater of Wei Wuxian ("you were his only mistake") while CQL Lan Xichen is sooo tired of Nie Huaisang (his "I hate our stupid baby" expression when NHS pulls on his arm in public delights me), and my xicheng goggles enjoy making this partly about Jiang Cheng. Why does Wei Wuxian get to play with and insult Jiang Cheng, yet be forgiven every time? Why does Nie Huaisang get to wave at Jiang Cheng in front of the whole cultivation world? I know that's not intended—xicheng is accused of being a crackship, and I don't mind at all. They would crack too if they saw the vision!!

Jiang Cheng needs someone with whom he can trust his delicate side. My crystal ball informs me that Jiang Yanli is the only person in the world who ever got Jiang Cheng's softboi bigs my eyes at you chatterbox mode, and I think Lan Xichen could also be trusted with his vulnerabilities. He needs someone who is kind to children, especially difficult ones who scream in your ear and cry easily, and are perfect little brats in every way. He needs someone who can understand the pressures that he's under and won't begrudge him for focusing on his sect and caring about his disciples.

And while it's not romantic, in ye olden times, both of them need to be loved by someone who understands that eventually they will need to marry a woman and produce heirs to fulfill their filial duties.

I also think Lan Xichen has a didi kink and Jiang Cheng has a gege kink. Perfect match. 🥰