#paradoxposting

[princeparadoxe]

On the twelfth day of Christmas, my good wife gave to me: a letter opener. A perfectly sharp letter opener. A very beautiful and ornate object, made of silver of course, but I nearly cut myself unwrapping it. Her reasoning? Since I am constantly wounding people with words, I might as well commit the deed with an appropriate weapon.

This is the only time of the year during which I am grateful for having a wife.

[blubparadox]

i'm gonna start another SIVA Outbreak using Outbreak Perfected specifically to kill Saladin for making me grind through the worst crucible mode ever conceived (Tribute) just to get my stupid title because the title didn't exist 4 years ago when I grinded out iron banner originally.

[princeparadoxe]

How in the world you and Basil are still friends when you always argue with one another?? How do you even resolve your constant fighting time and time again yet continue with the cycle of arguments🤕

You need to go to a couple counseling, at this point. you fight like you are married to one another and it's disturbing

I suppose Basil and I can indeed, on occasion, bring out both the best and the worst in each other. While I appreciate your concern, however misguided it may be, you must not confuse arguing with fighting. Besides, I never argue; I merely discuss. If I do not discuss with someone, it signifies that they are unworthy of my time.

Now that you mention it, I do not "fight" with my wife nearly as often as I do with Basil. No, for you see, that would require me seeing her for extended periods of time, which we both usually have no particular desire to do. The secret to a successful marriage is to be perfectly detached from one another. God, marrying Basil, can you imagine? He already does quarrel like a jealous wife…

[princeparadoxe]

My darlings,

I come back from the dead tonight to offer my apologies—a practice close to foreign to me—for my absurdly long hiatus. Did you beautiful people believe I had important business to attend to? God, I hope not! That would be awfully out-of-character, wouldn't it?

But worry not; I have not yet forgotten about you, or all your wonderful messages, which I have regretfully neglected and left sitting in my mailbox for the last few weeks. Or months. How long has it been anyway? I try not to think about the passage of time,

Regardless, I have missed this pointless endeavour. I shall now take the time to answer your enquiries in my best capacity, lest they somehow begin to whither and rot.

Yours truly,

H. W.

[princeparadoxe]

How would you adress the accusations of somehow having taken Dorians soul in exchange for giving him eternal youth (so basically, the interpretation that you might be the devil)?

Those accusations are simply ridiculous. What on Earth would I make of a soul? I already have one of my own — although I am highly doubtful of the soul's existence as some kind of spiritual thing — and that is largely enough as it is! No, Dorian's youth is, unfortunately, as much of a mystery to me as it is to everybody else.

However, I must say that it always brings me much pleasure to be compared to the devil. It must mean I am doing something right.

[princeparadoxe]

what if I told you I pegged basil

I would tell you that I am surprised, as I thought he favoured the real thing.

[princeparadoxe]

crude question: what kind of role do you take on during sex? (submissive, dominant, etc.)

Another one of those questions, I see. To this, I answer: Why must I limit myself by associating a term to my behaviour? The roles which I play, both in and out of the bedroom, are not to be defined by the shallow nomenclature favoured by the younger generations.

But, if you really must know, there are a few people, some friends of mine, who might be willing to offer you some insight on the matter — however inaccurate or inconsistent their answers may be. But I shan't be the one to do it, my dear friend.

Besides, why is everybody so desperate to know about my sexual preferences? It is quite flattering, I must admit, but there is a decided redundancy in those questions.

[princeparadoxe]

i want you vro

Vro? Do you believe that the chances of you having me are made more favourable by your use of nonsensical language? Is this how today's youth woos their conquests?

This so-called "Gen Z language" is both confusing and incredibly fascinating. I must educate myself about it.