@khashanakalashtar (apparently) accurately describes @halfdesertedstreets for @fite-me-dio
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@khashanakalashtar (apparently) accurately describes @halfdesertedstreets for @fite-me-dio
parswoops music au
that's it that's the title. thanks to @cadenzamuse, who made this better.
Kent and Jack released one (1) album. it was called No Look and it had 13 songs
it quickly (really quickly) became a hit, with all four of its singles topping the charts. sold-out tours, etc.
the vibe of the album was very Lorde circa Pure Heroine mixed with Troye Sivan
one critic called it "the homoerotic album of the decade"
which, yeah. all the songs are about love and childhood and friendship and soft crush heartbreak
they signed for 4 albums onto some big name label. except that before their last (sold out) concert, Jack overdosed
and Kent performed alone
so Jack is out of the picture. his dad is rich enough to buy expensive lawyers to get him out of the contract
but Kent is still in.
almost a year after the end of the No Look tour, Kent quietly drops a song called Jack of Hearts. it goes mostly unnoticed
and meanwhile No Look has turned into this cult classic album. no slash ship is complete without at least one 13 chapter fic that follows the arc of the album with every song being the theme for one chapter. all your ships, what good are they without a No Look au. it actually becomes a huge trope
Kent's second album, Desert, releases two years after Jack of Hearts
it's got songs about loneliness and traveling and being away from home and missing things you can't have. it's the ultimate album for that post breakup mood where you're no longer sad but you're still empty.
Kent moves to Vegas because that's where his label is based and it hurts to be in the same country as Jack
Kent is still crying to the songs he and Jack heard together while writing No Look. he's still eating ice cream on the floor at 2am because he woke up cold and missing Jack
and writing Desert helps, but not enough
until one day he comes across this article by a music critic–about Jack of Hearts, of all things. Kent had almost forgotten about that song. but the article is this lovely dissection of the music and lyrics and doesn't mention Kent's personal life at all and Kent just. wants to talk to this guy, all of a sudden. he needs to talk to this guy who sees Kent's art and takes it as it's given
which means so much to Kent now. so he DMs the guy (Jeff smth) on Twitter
and tells him how much it means to Kent that Jeff sees Kent's music and songs as they are given, instead of trying to analyse meaning into them. not that there isn't meaning, but Kent would like some control over his narrative, thanks
I think Jeff grew up in a fam w many artists. his dad was an actor and his mom was a director
and they had him pretty young so he grew up watching them make stuff and it was kinda really important to them that the things they made be accepted as they were, without analysis of anything beyond the thing itself
so Kent and Jeff talk about their childhoods and Kent talks about cats and Jeff talks about his pet axolotl, Oscar.
it's healing. it feels like Kent's finding himself again, just so he has stuff to talk to Jeff about. because Jeff is so good. he's sharp and funny and he remembers things that Kent tells him, even little things like the colour of Kit's fur and Kent's favourite pizza toppings.
they meet in person for the first time at a music festival in New York. they get coffee afterwards, and Kent goes back to Jeff's apartment.
Jeff has a loft. his axolotl is on a table by the window, and the place is littered with books and old copies of Rolling Stone. the floor is layered with rugs and carpets, and Kent knows it's because the loft gets cold in winter. there are posters plastered over the walls–old movie posters, grunge bands that haven't put out a song on a decade.
"Oh my god," Kent says. "You're a hipster."
Jeff grins, and Kent smiles back, helpless.
///
Kent's third album is called A Fishtank By The Window. the music is upbeat without being annoying. it sounds like night traffic and water and the rustle of paper. the music beats in your heart and makes you feel like you're in love.
Jeff Troy refuses to review it, insisting he's too biased.
For Those Looking Into Joining The Parse Posi Posse
Here are a few things you need to know:
We get critical about the comic.
There’s a channel dedicated to this, but sometimes it overflows into other spaces a bit. Generally, we’re really good about keeping that kind of stuff confined to their respective spaces.
Just because we get critical DOES NOT MEAN WE HATE THE COMIC OR NGOZI.
We discourse kinda often
Again, there is a channel for it. The salt spills out of it occasionally, but what happens in the discourse channel usually stays in the discourse channel.
Garden-of-succulents is in this server.
She is fairly active in this server. This is kind of a general warning, because if you are uncomfortable with the idea of interacting with her, then there is no point in you being in this server probably.
This is kind of a deal breaker for most people, I know. Do not join and then later leave claiming you didn’t know she was here.
Not everyone likes Zimbits.
This is also important of note. There are plenty of us that do like Zimbits and plenty still who do not. We have channels for Pimms and Bittyparse and people have routinely talked about what they do and do not like about the ship.
That doesn’t mean folks bash the ship in any way. If you cannot handle someone voicing their discomfort with the ship, this is not the place for you.
We are generally a drama free place.
We uplift each other constantly.
We piggy back off of each other’s ideas a lot.
There’s almost always someone online
This is a Love Kent zone so generally, we’re out here loving Kent.
DO NOT CALL US APOLOGISTS
DO NOT CALL US ABUSERS
DO NOT CALL US ABUSE ENABLERS
DO NOT ASSUME WE DON’T KNOW WHAT KENT HAS SAID
DO NOT ASSUME WE HATE JACK
DO NOT ASSUME WE HATE BITTY
DO NOT MAKE ASSUMPTIONS ABOUT US AND OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH KENT PARSON
We interpret canon differently and if you take that to mean that we support abuse you’re absolutely incorrect and you can get off this blog and any blog this post is on immediately. None of us condone abuse.
We’re not a strictly Kent place; there’s always space for headcanons, fics, fic-recs, and anything else about other characters.
We accept minors! Minors get a minor role so that they aren’t subjected to NSFW.
We have a sister server for porn and all that porn entails.
We love our porn.
That’s the rundown need to know for folks wanting to join the Parse Posi Posse. We’re a fun group; there’s channels for all needs and we generally have a lot of fun together. If you wanna join but don’t really think you can interact, that’s fine. We have a role for lurkers.
I figured it was time to let more people into the server, but I hate having to tell them so much shit first. This is all of it. I think.
Rare is, indeed, an English Teacher if I remember correctly
Because the worst thing you could be is, of course, white
the Kent as Matt Duchene au
Kent is so cut up and hurt after Jack because everyone in his new team just. dislikes him (they're not the aces cause I luv the aces sorry) and he feels so out of place and alone
I know! Kent goes to the Bruins first, but they don't need him and he isn't getting as much ice time as he deserves, and eventually they trade him to the some expansion team with a really shitty coach
parswoops trash fluff
the last 2 days have turned me into parswoops trash. anyway have some bullet point fic
Kent gets like, real offended when ppl talk about how all cats are secretly assholes
he's ranting abt this to Jeff, sitting on the couch with his legs tucked under him and bc he's Smol this means that he's the same height as Jeff.
Kent: cats aren't assholes, Jeff. ppl just read them wrong. they read cats with dog body language. how do u expect that to work? cats and dogs are different animals. a cat shaking her tail is not the same thing as a dog wagging its tail
and Jeff is smiling and nodding along and when Kent pauses he leans in to kiss Kent. just puts his hands on Kent's shoulders and kisses him deep and hard. but Kent is a complete asshole who doesn't lose his train of thought when he's being kissed and Jeff would mind but it's clear proof that his bf is Extremely Smart so he kinda loves it
and when Jeff pulls away Kent is flushed and panting a bit but a couple seconds later he's back on his rant
Kent: cats love us, Jeff! they just have different ways of showing it. like kit yells at me around dinner time bc she wants me to eat. nothing wrong with that. they love us, Jeff. ppl don't know how to interpret their affection
and Jeff is still holding onto Kent's shoulders. but at some point during this rant, his hands have moved and now they're holding Kent's face. and Jeff is listening, bc he's a good bf who respects Kent, but he's also looking at Kent's face and admiring how Pretty his bf is. and how much he loves this boy
and when Kent stops again, Jeff kisses him again. and he's also stroking Kent's jaw a little. and Kent is legit panting bc he might be a hockey player but it's hard to talk and kiss and think all at the same time
Jeff: I love you
Kent: do you know that declawing cats leads to arthritis–wait what?
Jeff: (smiling) I love you
Kent: yeah me too. (pause) do people know that declawing leads to arthritis? I think I should start a campaign. you'd help me, right? Jeff?
the end
In Which Kit Is An Interfering Familiar by @khashanakalashtar for @restfulinsomniac
Kent runs a magic shop. Jeff is a technology witch on the same block. Kit has opinions.