#peacemaker writing

[laceymorganwrites]

Adrian Chase doesn´t get the fucking hint

A/N: I just rewatched season 1 before season 2 comes out on Friday and man, I need him so bad. like I´m so delusional about him I genuinely think I could bag him when in reality he would hate my guts- anyway, I had to put my horny somewhere so have this (I always wanted to do a post in this format yippie!)

fem!reader

Adrian Chase who never had a girlfriend before and only ever fucks as Vigilante

Adrian Chase who still plays DnD and listens to Taylor Swift because he wants to fuck her

Adrian Chase who´s fucking clueless about anything romance related (mostly due to his neurodivergency, but I genuinely think he can love, just in his own way yk?)

Adrian Chase who never grew out of his phase of loving big tits and a good blowjob, he´s grateful for Chris because he can live his superhero fantasy through him whenever they pick up chicks together

Adrian Chase who knows he´s never going to be the hero he wants to be but he doesn´t care because the people he kills deserve it

Adrian Chase who will kill your rapist/abuser/stalker no questions asked

Adrian Chase who always has this big stupid grin on his face with no thought behind it

Adrian Chase who´s not porn addicted but a pervert

Adrian Chase who gets off on killing people, teaming up with people he looks up to, the way his guns feel in his hands, the sounds his knives make whenever they hit his target

Adrian Chase who gains so much confidence as Vigilante that he starts thinking he´s hot without the costume as well

Adrian Chase who doesn´t drink and doesn´t do drugs and beats up everyone who says that makes him boring

Adrian Chase who has a favorite place for everything, food, comics, cinema, everything

Adrian Chase who sees red every time someone makes fun of him (which he still wonders why the fuck that still happens-)

Adrian Chase who does not believe you when you tell him you like him

Adrian Chase who doesn´t believe the others when they beg him to just fuck you already because you´ve had a crush on him for months now and it´s just getting sad at this point

Adrian Chase who isn´t exactly a sadist but is so detached from emotions that he turns into something even crueler

Adrian Chase who laughs in your face at your confession

Adrian Chase who gets rock hard the second you slap him across the face and start yelling at him

Adrian Chase who has to do a fucking double take because weren´t you the one on the team who was the most well behaved? (because you´re literally one step away from the death sentence)

Adrian Chase who tells you straight forward that he doesn´t like you like that but he´ll consider suiting up to fuck you

Adrian Chase who is speechless for the first time in his life when you tell him you don´t want to fuck Vigilante, you want to fuck him

Adrian Chase who can´t put a finger on the way that makes him feel

Adrian Chase who never understood what people meant when they said they were in love, who tried to understand it by logic but failed over and over again

Adrian Chase who believes he´s incapable of loving someone and deep down wants to be proven wrong because while he knows he´s pretty much too far gone on the humanity spectrum, he doesn´t quite want to go off the charts there

Adrian Chase who thinks dates are overrated and exhausting

Adrian Chase who will yap about his weapons collection and proudly shows off the rarest items that don´t even get produced anymore and gives you those puppy dog eyes to ask him about it

Adrian Chase who picks up on every single mood of yours and somehow always matches your energy, or maybe you match his because there´s no way in hell he´s going to adapt for another person

Adrian Chase who can´t say no to a little treat so he might as well take one for you

Adrian Chase who invites himself into your place in the middle of the night because he claims he likes your TV better. He doesn´t even say hi or goes into your bedroom, just sits on your couch like a creep and laughs at shitty TV shows that haven´t been running for 5 years now

Adrian Chase who follows you around like a puppy and is more than fine with you saying you´re his girlfriend even though he always said being in a relationship is much too annoying for him

Adrian Chase who gets uncharacteristically overprotective whenever you get hit on

Adrian Chase who feels like a little fucking princess whenever you get overprotective over him

Adrian Chase who doesn´t look at other women´s tits anymore, but can´t look away from your lips, it´s like he´s hyperfixated on them at every time, he hangs onto your every word

Adrian Chase who still has sweaty hands whenever you hold his

Adrian Chase who moans into every kiss

Adrian Chase who thinks you´re the prettiest all tied up for him, especially because he anticipates the second you free yourself and take control every single time

Adrian Chase who stutters every time Chris brings you up

Adrian Chase who blushes every time he says out loud that he´s your boyfriend

Adrian Chase who only ever vocalises it for you, because he knows you need to hear it

Adrian Chase whose voice trembles and cracks the first time he tells you he might be in love with you, his body trembling, unable to look into your eyes

Adrian Chase who is so down bad it makes him look clinicially insane because he already was stupid before

Adrian Chase who´s entirely and utterly yours

[laceymorganwrites]

Sports car

A/N: his fucking car, man

fem!reader

Adrian never was the car guy. his mom taught him how to drive and he got her old car when she got a new one. he never really gave it much thought. it´s just a car, he needs and uses it to get to places but that´s pretty much it

he never was the car or sports guy, he never was like the other guys in school, always standing out with his weird hobbies but in reality he thought it was the others that were weird. who the hell cared so much about a fucking sports team? that was pathetic. the only thing more pathetic are guys who measure their worth with their car that either their rich parents got them or they got in some shady way

and all just to get girls, as if they actually thought just having a car would work, they didn´t even like them in the first place. the only reason that it "worked" was because they were teenagers and everyone was horny

not Adrian though, not at that age.

he used his car to drive to the comic book store, to get new DnD figurines, to the crafts store to get inspired for his first suit

it´s no secret he always wanted to be a hero, he always looked up to Batman especially because of his gadgets, though he does have his own sense of justice. and once he sets his mind on something he just doesn´t stop, he fully commits

so, superhero suit? he got that. gaining strength? already on it. weapons? good thing he´s always been a fucking nerd and has a concerning collection of obscure weapons. information network? he´s chronically online. so now the only thing is missing is a mobile.

but again, he already has that. he doesn´t use it for official hero work just because it would dox him, but somehow he immediately started referring to his car at his V-mobile, even though he doesn´t use it to brag

eventually it becomes a common saying for him, he doesn´t even think much of it and most people he works with don´t take it all that seriously, knowing he´s a bit of an oddball and has his own way of thinking

so it´s always a funny thing how new people react to him talking about his car, they all expect a sleek sports car or hell, even a cool van. certainly not the model he drives

one day Harcourt jokes about how it´s no wonder he´s single with a car like that, the others just tease him about not getting any pussy in this thing until you say you like his car

it´s this awkward moment, you´re kind of new to the group, you don´t know their dynamic yet and felt bad for Adrian, now you´re faced with awkward silence and John of all people having to explain they didn´t mean it in a rude way

"so what, you´d let him pick you up in that for a date?" Harcourt says, a clear challenge in her voice, one that completely goes over his head.

"I mean yeah, it´s just a car, I don´t get what the big deal is" you shot her a warning glare, you were drunk when you said you´d totally fuck him if he let you and she just happened to overhear it and wouldn´t stop teasing you about your crush. still, was it really a crush if you just wanted his dick? maybe it was now that you actually got to know him a bit, which only made everything more complicated so you kind of just stopped thinking about it altogether. not like it would ever work out between the two of you anyway.

"See? She gets it!" Adrian finally speaks up, really sensitive about people being needlessly mean about his car, at the end of the day it is the Vigilante mobile because he´s the one that´s driving, not because it necessarily has to look cool. nowhere was it written that you had to have a cool car to be a superhero. if he could do it, anyone could. maybe just not as efficient as he did.

"so if you´re not gonna pick me up for a date, you might as well drive me home" you sighed, not really thinking anything about it. at this point you genuinely just wanted to get home. it was Adrian after all, it was useless to flirt with him, he wouldn´t get it anyway unless you told him directly and if you did that he´d just think you wanted to be his friend. not that there was anything wrong with it, that was just how he worked.

and just like suspected he doesn´t react at all to your implication, just says goodbye to his friends and agrees to drive you home. at least he´s a gentleman about it, holds the door for you, does that thing where he pats the metal and boasts about "her" never failing him, how he´s never been in an accident before, how the car is sturdier than it looks and how he´s a great driver. granted, that´s all true but it completely takes away all the magic and the fantasy of being in his stupid car with him.

yet somehow you don´t mind that at all, especially not when he gives you that big, stupid grin he always has, so proud of his car and the safety of it, so proud of being a great driver, making sure you´re wearing your seatbelt and feel comfortable in his V-mobile

"you´re adorable, you know that?" you mention, not even thinking about him reacting to it, it´s just that your thoughts left your lips before you could stop them. it was true after all, he was adorable, in his very own way. Adrian was just adorable in general, how could you not love him? though really it was more of a crush you knew wouldn´t be reciprocated, he just wasn´t that kind of guy. and that was more than okay.

"like a cat?" he asked, making you laugh at how quick his response was, he definitely was more of a cat guy but they weren´t even in the top 5 of his favorite animals. he probably just said that because he knew that most people associated cats with being adorable (totally not his first thought because Harcourt once caught him licking a wound on his arm and yelling: "what are you, a fucking cat?" and him just going: "what? saliva´s good for cleaning wounds, I read it on the internet")

"no, more like a puppy, you know those that never get adopted because they´re kind of ugly or difficult but you just love them anyway?" you try to explain, glanicng over at him and just reassuring yourself that your assessment was correct. he even had the puppy dog eyes down, though he mostly got those while killing, even more so whenever he gets to tell the tale of it to his friends.

"don´t you hate dogs?" he asked, confused, not quite understanding the analogy just yet. he just thinks it´s an insult, a weird one, sure, but he doesn´t think much of it. most of his friends show their love and appreciation in a bit of shittalk so he knows at this point not to take it seriously, but you´re different. you´re always brutally honest, so he´s all the more confused as to why you´d call him an adorable puppy boy essentially.

"I don´t hate dogs, I´m just scared of them" you deflected, a bit embarrassed about it even though logically you knew you didn´t have to be, fear was always irrational after all. Adrian´s quiet for a while after that, making a turn, then glancing over at you again. and for a second there something in him shifted, if only for an instant, his eyes lingered just a bit longer, he had this strange and sudden need to protect that only ever came up in a more general sense whenever he went on patrol.

"you don´t have to be scared of me" his voice was quiet when he said that, there was a vulnerability in him that neither of you even knew existed. and neither of you knew how to handle it, it wasn´t just awkward, it was this dangerous path that came close to walking on thin ice, never knowing when it would break, only knowing that it would eventually.

"I know" your tone matched his, maybe even more fragile than his but it was all the confirmation he needed. out of all the 11th street kids the two of you were the ones that had the hardest time truly feeling valued, only that neither of you truly felt like you belonged, but what you did know was that it was okay, that eventually you would and at the end of the day it helped that you weren´t alone.

the next few minutes were silent, not necessarily awkward, however you still felt the need to break it, if only to make whatever happened between you two less real, real was scary.

"so you ever fucked in here?" you chuckled, trying to lighten the mood, you were just teasing, laughing loudly at Adrian´s response.

"no, ew, that´s disgusting. I´d never be able to get it clean again" he said, appalled at the thought alone, but not at you.

"I know, right? I hate car sex, fucking uncomfortable, never worth it. just as much as a scam as fucking in the shower" you laughed, sitting upright again.

"well, this is me, thanks for driving me. I´ll see you around" you said your goodbyes, but from this day on Adrian would always drive you home or anywhere else you wanted, he valued bonding with you in car rides, it was the closest thing you´d ever get to a proper date with Adrian.

[laceymorganwrites]

Economos and his super hot girlfriend

A/N: super super chill about being single rn btw (I am falling apart)

SPOILERS FOR LIKE ALL OF PEACEMAKER BTW

you know those guys with girlfriends so far out of their league it´s not even laughable anymore? the kind where you´re just so confused but way too invested in how the fuck he even bagged her in the first place? like she definitely pegs him, that´s crystal clear. but he can´t be that funny, right? maybe he´s just rich? but that´s not John.

it´s been weeks now since the guys tried to figure it out. it´s not like John brags about you either, he rarely mentions you. he´s a very private man in general so it´s no surprise his friends and colleagues don´t know about you. well, one day he does casually mention his girlfriend when they plan another hangout. and pure chaos ensues. Chris just does not believe him, not even after John shows him a picture of you two together. just says it´s either fake or you´re some hooker he paid. Leota is super supportive and excited immediately, wanting to meet you as soon as possible. she´s just very proud and happy for John, especially since she knew something was up, he seemed happier somehow. Adrian doesn´t even react at all because he knows already. it´s Harcourt who has the best reaction though, she just starts laughing so fucking hard she doesn´t stop for a solid ten minutes because there is no way in hell John has a girlfriend. not one as hot as you. it´s not even something against him personally, it´s just that she´s worked with the guy for years, no way can she picture him with a fucking vision like you.

so, how´d you two even meet? Adrian introduces you two since he´s planning a new campaign and still needs a few more players. you´re his childhood friend and participated in every campaign he ever did, you know about his secret identity but you don´t talk about it because he doesn´t know that you know

so when he introduces you to John you immediately know he´s someone from work. and John knows immediately that you know too. literally the first connection you have is when Adrian leaves the room to get his figurines and dice is just the two of you making fun of him because it´s so painfully obvious that you know. and at the same time John just goes along with it not to make things awkward because he knows firsthand how important his secret identity is to Adrian.

unsurprisingly it´s John who falls first and somehow harder at the same time. he´s not used to beautiful women talking to him in general, he´s the type of guy to get nervous whenever he´s spoken to outside of his work environment, mostly due to the bullying he´s suffered in his youth and still occasionally in his adulthood. he´s the butt of the joke, he´s insecure, he doesn´t really take care of himself and pretty much gave up on dating

so when you talk to him normally, actually interested in what he has to say, it genuinely touches him. you may look like a fucking shallow bitch but you´re super sweet and considerate. just like he looks like a gooner discord mod but actually is super funny and empathetic. maybe that´s why you´re drawn to each other, because you´re both so hyperaware of the stereotypes surrounding your appearances

like hell even your dnd characters reflect this, he plays this op cutesy magical girl and you´re always the orc berserker, it´s super fun playing with him too

you just immediately get along, and he´s just your type too. he´s tall, funny, sensitive, he´s actually super considerate once you get to know him better. while he´s not the best at socialising at least the 11th street kids force him to stay in contact and actually do something

dating really just happened, Adrian gave you John´s number, you texted him first, asked to hang out, you watched a shitty horror movie and ate shitty pizza, you were so apalled by that you basically forced him to a second date just so he could taste your cooking and see how atrocious that pizza actually was (it wasn´t "alright" like he claimed it was-)

John pretty much goes along with what you want activity wise because 1. you´re way out of his league anyway and he´s secretly waiting for you to get bored of him and 2. he doesn´t fucking date, baby doesn´t even know what he´s doing, he´s working all the time, he doesn´t have the time and he genuinely believes he´s a bad partner

well, you love proving people wrong, so you take it slow and steady, a bunch of cute dates, either out somewhere you two do something fun, like the cinema, comic book store, fairs and carnivals, anything you can find really. or at your place, those are your favorite because you just get to spoil him so much and there´s nothing he can do about it. he never used to be too much of a sweet tooth before he met you actually. but the treats you make him taste too good to pass on, besides you´re always mad at him if he doesn´t finish the food you make

the best thing about home dates is that you just get to be as touchy as you want. because while you have no issue with slow and steady, you do want to make the most of the time you have. and at this point he´s had enough time to realise you actually want him.

"so when are you finally going to let me fuck you?"

"have you seen me?"

John is a huge cuddler but refuses to make the first move for the longest time because of his own insecurities, even kissing is a huge deal to him because he claims he´s not good at it (there is no such thing as a bad kisser btw, take it from someone who hasn´t been kissed in over three years-)

does not believe you find him physically attractive at all, that paired with his anxiety is just the worst and it makes him spiral so bad because at this point he´s so in love with you he doesn´t want you to leave him and you haven´t even put a label on whatever it is between the two of you yet

John definitely needs someone stable as a partner, someone who won´t be mad at him for working so much and so long, someone who always has his back and reassures him

I feel like he´d need someone brutally honest and logical to match his irrational fears and anxiety, somebody who can tell him he´s stupid without actually making him feel like it when it all gets too much

someone who will hold his hand through it all and face his fears head on, beating them with him together so that he sees that they aren´t as bad and that more importantly he´s stronger than he thinks

he calls you in the middle of the night the day Rick Flag Sr learns about his son´s death, super scared of what will happen to him now. he just knows that everything is about to change, something that always fills him with a sense of dread. but he knows that there´s one thing he can never let change and that´s you. so he calls you crying, unable to sleep and just a mess to tell you he loves you. needless to say you´re at his place in the next minutes to say it right back. he also receives the most mindblowing and intense orgasm he´s ever had that night, but that´s besides the point (did he really think you could keep your hands off him once he told you?)

so, like with any relationship, now that it´s official you want to meet his friends, having heard an awful lot about the 11th street kids before from Adrian alone. Adrian who will always call either of you at the most inconvenient time too (one time he called in the middle of a session when you were edging John and you just talked for almost an hour, Adrian said hi to John right as he was about to cum and he´s been mortified ever since. Adrian literally didn´t even notice though)

anyway- he tells you about the coming home party they´re having for him and you just know you have to be there, you´ve heard so much about them from John and Adrian both (enough to know about the merciless teasing and how you need to get in there as well) and it´s pretty much settled you´ll be there as well

"we´re early, aren´t we?" you chuckled as John and you walked up the stairs to Harcourt´s place. she´s pretty much flabbergasted when she sees you but doesn´t say anything, though the deadpan look in her eyes says it all. she just gives John a quick nod of approval before heading up to the roof. she does still tease him a lot about it, only in a fun way though since she actually respects him. and while she is wary of you at first, just seeing the way you treat John makes her realise you´re a good one and you pretty much got her blessing there

Leota is definitely the one who´s most excited about meeting you, after all she´s pretty much the only one who ever asked John about you genuinely so she knows how you two met and all that already. she´s such a heartwarming person and just embraces you in a hug immediately when she spots you two, telling you how beautiful you are, how grateful she is to you because of how happy John is now, how you´ve impacted his life so much so that she notices and appreciates it

Chris on the other hand just fucking loses it. he doesn´t believe you´re real, for a solid two hours he thinks John booked you not to look like a fool, even when you two kiss, when you tell him how you met, when you show him pictures of your date nights. it´s only when you swipe a bit too far that he actually believes you and gives John the biggest nod of respect he can muster

Emilia is the one who adds you to the groupchat btw

[laceymorganwrites]

comforting John

A/N: do I add the idiot father son duo to this mini series as well?

it happens after he had another nightmare

John and you have been going steady for a while now, for such a long time that his anxiety is spiking again. it´s not the same anxiety he felt when he first fell for you, nor is it the one he had when you had your first date. it´s not even the one when you first moved in together and for the first time he realized just how serious this was getting.

no, it´s more than that, it´s more substantial somehow. because with all of the above you were there, right by his side. he never stopped being scared but none of that mattered because of you. because you were strong enough for the both of you, strong enough to push these thoughts away

he knew he wasn´t a good boyfriend, but he´s trying for you and you always keep telling him how that´s more than enough. and he´s grateful for that, so very grateful to have you by his side. still the thoughts linger and he´s too weak to do anything about, let alone tell you about it

he really doesn´t want to drag you down with this since being with him is miserable enough already, he doesn´t know how you do it, he doesn´t understand why you love him

he remembered the day he met you as clear as day, Harcourt introduced you two after you transfered from another agency. the attraction was there immediately, but John didn´t have the guts to ask you out right away, only after Harcourt convinced him to

he still didn´t believe you said yes, that you shared an awkward lunch together that day, that you somehow wanted to go on a second date with him

he cried when he told you he loved you and so did you, unable to process these feelings. it was new for both of you

he moved in with you two years ago and things have been nothing short of perfect ever since then, too perfect even

John always feels like something bad will happen at any time and there won´t be a way for him to stop it, sure that feeling has been dwindling since you´ve been together, you´re definitely the stronger partner that keeps all his fears at bay, nobody does it like you and he tells you each day how grateful he is for you

how nice it feels to have his thoughts be quiet for once, with you he learned to appreciate the presence, to be spontaneous, to live in the here and now

the days are brighter now, but some nights are even darker than before, because now he has something to lose that goes beyond just his friends he´s sure don´t even like him all that much

he´s constantly in a crisis because of the way he has to juggle his private and work life, he knows he shouldn´t get attached, because attachment means a weakness and a weakness will always be exploited. and yet you and his friends wormed your way into his fucked up heart and it just makes him worry so fucking much each day, what if something happens to you and it´s all his fault? what if he has to make an impossible choice? what if he´s backed into a corner? but none of that comes even close to his greatest fear, the one so deep implemented in him it only ever appears in his darkest nightmares

he´s warned you about his nightmares and sleeping problems on your first date already (so much for not getting attached, he knew the second he met you he had to have you in his life, because as cheesy as it sounded all his doubts vanished the second he saw you, as if he had never known fear in his whole life)

sleeping next to you fills him with so much dread the first time it happens just because he moves around in his sleep so much, he snores, he sweats, he´s outright disgusting and he just doesn´t want to make you uncomfortable

but again, you make it all go away the second he wakes up the next morning and sees you curled up against him, still peacefully asleep, your arm around his stomach and your head against his chest

he´s never felt so calm before

with work being especially stressful lately he´s been having restless nights again, you´ve tried your best to make his nights more peaceful again, making his favorite meal for dinner, a nice bath, great sex, a bunch of cuddles, but tonight nothing worked

you woke up to him having a nightmare, sitting up to gently shake him awake, still half asleep yourself, it takes a long time and when he´s finally awake he starts sobbing immediately, still caught up in the dreadful thoughts that haunted his sleep

you pull him in for a hug, kissing his cheek and gently raking your fingers through his hair to bring him back to the present moment, freeing him from the clutches of his nightmare

"please don´t leave me" he chokes out, his hands trembling as he places them on your waist and finally voices his biggest fear for the first time. he never brought it up because he was scared you´d just think it´s silly, but it´s true. he´s constantly afraid that you´ll find someone better than him. and he couldn´t even blame you, it wouldn´t even be that hard

but you don´t. you stay. always.

[laceymorganwrites]

comforting Adrian

A/N: when he just needs his mommy

spoilers for s2 ep 05

fem!reader

Adrian always talks about you and granted everyone is too scared to ask about it at this point because he never once said your name or mentioned he had a girlfriend

because you´re not, you´re his mommy

and knowing Adrian the 11th street kids genuinely don´t want to know whether it´s a creepy family or obscure sex thing

honestly as expected whatever´s going on between you two just sort of happened, you´re neighbors, to you he started out as the cute awkward kid next door who sometimes gets you free leftovers from his job

you know his mom and come over for coffee a lot, you even meet his older brother at some point, needless you´re pretty close with the Chase´s

you´re a basket case, without ever wanting to be one but sometimes life just happened and there was no escaping it, shitty childhood led you to think you deserved all the shitty things happening to you, at one point you just got so used to it that you didn´t think your life could be any different at all

you´ve always thought Adrian was cute but you mostly just teased him, not really entertaining the thought of being with him, he was younger than you, though not much, you knew he wasn´t a loser like most people would think, he had his life together unlike you so you knew from the start it wouldn´t work out

you´re the type to be constantly in relationships just to avoid feeling lonely and he deserves better than that, you just know you´d break his heart and you couldn´t do that to him and much less his family who always gave you a place to stay when you couldn´t go home that night

Adrian couldn´t stand hearing the constant yelling and your crying, especially your crying. maybe it was because he himself was unable to cry or maybe it was because he couldn´t understand how such a strong person like yourself could be taken down so much

honestly he´s been thinking about killing your boyfriends ever since he was sixteen years old, becoming Vigilante just helped making that his actual goal now, though he made a thorough plan not to let them be his first victims of justice, that would be too obvious, too desperate even. he didn´t want to look lame in front of you, he wanted to be strong enough to protect you

in his mind he already knew you´d understand, that you´d thank him even. you always understood him in ways no one else did, stood up for him when no one else did. he´d never forget that day when you got out of your way to get the newest volume of his favorite comic series for him when he couldn´t go himself because his bullies would jump him, or when you´d invite him in to watch a movie each time one of your boyfriends left or broke up with you, or cheated on you. because you didn´t want to be alone

he´d never forget how gentle and kind you were with him, how strong. not at all how you were with your boyfriends, that weak facade you put on to minimise the abuse, you were stuck in a vicious cycle and Adrian vowed to get you out

one night when he was coming home from patrol he heard the shouting again, then your cries. he already was suited up so he finally intervened like he always wanted to. he asked you to step aside so you wouldn´t get any blood on you, but had you stay in the room to watch as he killed and disposed of your boyfriend, making sure your place was squeaky clean afterwards, he even got rid of all his stuff, all the while going through extreme lengths to keep up his persona

"come on, Adrian, I know it´s you, you´re not exactly subtle. you do know I caught you making your first suit, right?" you said after you calmed down a bit, weirdly enough this was the wake up call you needed, you were done with dating for a while, for now you´d focus on yourself.

"oh, okay. you wanna order some Chinese?"

dating, confessions and making it official sort of never happened, but then again you weren´t in a conventional relationship. Adrian didn´t feel romantic love the way others did, he knew he had feelings for you, he knew they were different from what he felt for his friends

nothing much changed between you two, only that he became hyperaware of the dynamics at play and that he completely melted into them. you were always the one he felt the safest with, you always were the one he looked up to, the one who to him was the strongest. and yes, he was strong too, he had this deep urge to protect you, but he still knew he was below you. and he wouldn´t have it any other way

he´s surprised how clingy he is, you tell him he´s just touchstarved and that´s normal since he doesn´t really do partners, still from the beginning it´s crystal clear he´s yours, and you cherish that. the way you want to protect him is different from the way he wants to protect you. Adrian wants to protect you from the dangerous people out there, you want to protect him from the world

he doesn´t have sleeping issues, but still sleeps so much better next to you when he can feel you breathe, when he knows you´re safe and there for him. he never thought he´d love cuddling, but it wasn´t as bad as he thought it would be with you. he´s always the one initiating and you never once comment about how awkward it is, you just hold him like he´s the cutest little boy in the world and it makes him feel so safe

Adrian´s actually nervous about introducing you to the 11th street kids, scared they´ll only judge him again and make fun of him. he couldn´t take it. but they don´t. as soon as they meet you they understand. they´re happy for him, for finding a safe space in a person, for finding the kind of love that suits him perfectly, the kind that doesn´t need explaining, and most importantly one that transcends mere understanding

he tells you about his troubles with Chris, you´re the only one he can actually talk to about it, not just mentally, but physically. he never once voiced it out loud, that drift between them, the change he felt, how cold he was now. and how much that scared him. you were the only one who could comfort him.

and the others knew that too.

you arrived a few minutes later than everyone because you got held up at work and when you stepped through the door your heart just sank when you saw everyone.

"where is he?" you asked right after you finished reading the letter, it was hard to believe, the group only became friends because of Chris and now he´d just leave it all behind? for what? it didn´t make sense to you.

but mostly it broke your heart how throughout the entire letter Adrian wasn´t even mentioned once. not only that, it was just the tip of the iceberg, really. he has been off the last few months, in the friend group everyone teased Adrian because he was different and he didn´t mind that because he knew it was all out of love and wellbeing. and he knew if he truly felt bad about it he could voice these feelings and they´d stop. it was different with Chris. they used to be best friends, but lately Adrian´s been realising that was never true at all. he was simply tolerated by the older man because he was friends with his older brother. at first he didn´t mind it, he got to have a superhero buddy he could patrol with, someone who was the same as him. but that wasn´t the same anymore. Chris long since started looking at Adrian differently, in disdain almost, like he was nothing but a burden to him. what hurt the most was knowing he wasn´t even important enough to get a goodbye. and then he started spiraling, since when was Chris feeling this way? why didn´t he just tell him outright? that he didn´t want to be friends anymore? why was he just being an asshole about it? did he think Adrian was too weak to take it?

"baby?" you called softly when you entered the room to announce your presence, quietly closing the door behind you. you were grateful for Adebayo being there for him, it broke your heart seeing him like this. it might have been the first time he´s ever cried, you didn´t know. and that was the worst part. he never cried with you, he never even talked about it, you thought he couldn´t express himself that way and right now you wished that was true.

´thank you´ you mouthed to Adebayo and sat down on Adrian´s other side so he was shielded from everything going on, the arms of his mommy and close friend around him. you don´t mind Adebayo´s presence at all, in fact you´re grateful she´s here, Adrian needs all the support he can get right now and Leota´s always been good at comforting people

you not so much but then again you never needed to before, so far you´ve always been there for Adrian in other ways, for the first time in your entire relationship you felt utterly helpless, like you failed somehow

still you felt him calm down in your presence, lean into your touch as he sobbed until he eventually outright clutched onto you as Adebayo rubbed his back. you held him tighter, you didn´t speak, just held him until he was done crying, kissing the top of his head and gently soothing him

Adrian feels safe with you, he knows that crying isn´t anything to be embarrassed about and he isn´t, he is scared. scared because he didn´t think that he could ever express his feelings like that, it was hard enough to come to terms with his love for you, and now this? he´s just glad he´s not alone, not just you, but all of his friends too. even if it means losing Chris, he´s not alone anymore