#penroseparticle

[lookninjas]

365.

apparently some days you will mourn them by getting furious at their bad puns all over again

by trying to bring them back by mentioning their nemesis

by remembering the most ridiculous thing you cried over, after and crying over it again and it remains ridiculous

they don't put these bits in books or movies or tv shows

Dan Humphrey is not in any of the six stages of grief

but most human things no one teaches you

you just kind of go through them regardless

[mzminola]

Spring. I take a lot of flower photos, but I went out and took these ones specifically because when I read @into-the-weeds's post about seeing cherry blossoms at the park with Colton, I looked out the window and saw these trees blooming. Right when I read the post. Pretty sure they'd only just started to peek out of their buds the day before.

@penroseparticle-memorial

[tired-in-a-tree]

@into-the-weeds requested I make a version of This Very Good Post for @penroseparticle, but with some of his favourite Glee characters instead!

Look, I mean, Glee started it all. And Grief is already the perfect joke, + the irony of making this for Colton matches the energy of the show that both that gave us the QB & "No, this is her son." How could I not?

[rainbowrites]

[image description: a pile of chocolate chip cookies on a counter in front of a plastic bag with more of the same cookies]

I saw that Colton died last week, and almost immediately couldn't process it. Closed the tab and walked away. I didn't think I deserved to be sad about someone who I had never met in real life. But today I looked through @penroseparticle-memorial and was so fucking moved. So here it is:

I met @penroseparticle, like many of us, through Glee. It feels strange to say I met him, when I never met him in person. But I did meet him. I did know him. Just because it happened online doesn't mean it didn't happen. I met him when I was 17. I'm 31 now. I knew him for 14 years. That's almost half my life. Even after Glee ended and we stopped screaming together every week about the Everything that was that show, I always enjoyed seeing him on my dash. He was like a neighbor that I'd nod at sometimes, or enjoy a chuckle as he told me a funny story by the mailbox. Hell, even my fiancé knew him just based on how many of Colton's posts I would show him.

I never got to meet him in person so I don't have any pictures of him. But what I do have is a pictures of the chocolate chip cookies that he and @into-the-weeds politicked their way into getting through my follower give away. Never Forget Cookiegate. For literal years after that, every time I made cookies I thought about you guys and would laugh to myself. You guys waged a campaign that could have overthrown countries for those cookies. I remember you had people voting for you from across the world! You gathered so many people together, all for the sake of cookies and most importantly, in dedication to the bit.

I feel like that really sums you up. Bringing people together with food and laughter. I wish I had sent you more cookies. I wish I could have given them to you in person

[penroseparticle-memorial]

Colton

User · Colton

Music was an enormous part of Colton' life, and he loved sharing music with others. We know many of his friends on tumblr loved his music posts. His spotify is public, and can be found at the link. There's a lot to listen to.

[meadow-call]

real sad boy hours. real "of no creature living the last breath is twice required" hours. real "time whose gross decree sends now the dawn to clamor at our door" real "thus having done his evil worst to me will pass me by" real "harry me no more" hours. real "corn and roses and at rest" hours except that's you, the rest of us have to do the enduring. real "rise and wring my hands and steal away" hours.

[harompe]

goddamnit

[benztonite]

Du fehlst mir

Das trifft es so viel besser als I miss you

Oberflächlich vielleicht kein großer Unterschied. Nur eine weitere Eigenheit des Englischen?

tu me manques

(vos) me faltás

Du fehlst mir

Du bist das Subjekt hier. Du bist das, was fehlt. Ich vermisse Dich nicht nur und Du bist nur passives Objekt meiner. Nein, Du bist was mir fehlt. Ganz aktiv.

Ganz aktiv – trotz Deines Fehlens

Du bist nicht mehr da und das wird für immer so bleiben. Das ist ehrlich scheiße.

Du fehlst mir sehr