i struggle very much with verbal communication but i never know the right words to explain why it’s a struggle. often i just can’t verbally keep up with my own thoughts enough to be concise or clear.
but it’s not just that, i also struggle to monitor myself and what i say or how i say something when i have to speak verbally. people don’t often give you enough time to process your own thoughts and words in verbal communication. or are quick to find fault in your initial presentation of what you say.
sometimes the only way i can word the experience is if my brain spoke in a whole different language at times and i have to translate it - but i don’t always get the translation accurate the first time around.
it’s especially difficult when it’s not just the one thought firing off in my head. i have a constant monologue of ideals, questions, facts, interests, and multiple viewpoints happening at once to filter through.
of course there are days i’m better at verbal communication than others. but all that does is make people assume that i should be good at verbal communication all the time - so when i choose to go silent because i can’t keep up or my head is too noisy; it’s a problem.
