#pgsm ep 5

[keyofjetwolf]

I make that point about Usagi not doing anything just to be polite ever in her entire life, AND THEN THE SHOW GOES AND BACKS ME UP. Usagi’s late as fuck, hauling ass and flailing arms trying to get to school in something resembling a reasonable time, and she flies right by the groundskeeper. All that stuff about my being deeply ignorant of Japanese cultural requirements stand, but I feel pretty okay guessing that she’s not violating any particular social mores by keeping her head down and trying to get to class. (Being late to school is, I suspect, far worse, as far as social taboos go.) But Usagi can’t do that, because the groundskeeper matters to her. He’s a person, he’s important, he’s A FRIEND, and when Usagi wishes him good morning, she doesn’t do it because that’s what she’s supposed to do, she does it because SHE MEANS IT. Every second counts, and she’ll be in trouble, and she’ll be embarrassed and have to stand outside, and it’s clear from her expression and desperate run that she wants no part of any of that. Still, it’s all so much less important to her than not wishing him good morning.

AND I LOVE HER. I love this Usagi, so inept at basic human functions like “get up on time”, but so deeply, thoughtlessly kind.

[keyofjetwolf]

[keyofjetwolf]

THAT’S WHEN THE AWKWARD WOULD KICK IN IS IT

NOT BEFORE

JUST THEN

While we’re on the subject of things that are painful, the way Usagi is, completely without intention, feeding into every single one of Ami’s fears. To Usagi, comments like this are meant to be friendly and encouraging, a way to coax Ami out of her shell. Usagi doesn’t get that Ami uses her glasses as a protective barrier, but she DOES get that Ami is reserved and withdrawn, and she can see so much more in Ami that wants to be free. Statements like this, acts like insisting Ami join in karaoke, are Usagi’s attempts -- genuine and sincere attempts, if misguided -- to include Ami and put her at ease, to let her know she’s part of the group, not outside it.

All Ami can see, though, is criticism. Usagi showing her all the ways she’s wrong, Usagi telling her how she needs to be better. She’s only had Usagi in her life for about ten seconds, but she already means so much to Ami that Ami’s desperate to keep her. Her own self-image can’t possibly see that there’s not actually a problem, that she’s ACTIVELY CREATING ONE, when all she really needs to do is take a deep breath and possibly a Xanax.

Usagi’s already seen past the false front of Ami’s glasses to the person behind them. She doesn’t need to be sold on Ami, she bought Ami in wholesale bulk at first sight. NOW SOMEONE JUST NEEDS TO TELL AMI THAT.

That Usagi’s trying so hard and so badly to get Ami to just be Ami, and it’s the one thing Ami cannot possibly allow to happen is fucking DELICIOUS and I am FEASTING.

[keyofjetwolf]

NOTHING GOT REMOTELY SOLVED BUT I STILL GET TO END ON THIS AND REI WAS ONCE AGAIN YANKED INTO THE GROUP HUG I AM BEING SERVED ON EVERY LEVEL I AM A GOOD JET WOLF AND FINALLY GETTING MY REWARD

[keyofjetwolf]

Okay obviously this is a tense and weird situation for everyone, but particularly next to Ikuko’s little smile of sad encouragement next to Usagi’s blatant worry, Naru seems so detached, in a way that’s incredibly un-PGSM-Naru-like.

FOLLOW ME A SECOND KIDS

Naru is obviously much more involved in Usagi’s life in PGSM, which I super love, not just because PGSM Naru, but because it’s actually putting the work in for Usagi and Naru to be best friends. Which only means that, as Usagi falls deeper and deeper into Senshi stuff, she’s either going to have to bring Naru in too, or a rift will start to form between them. And if there’s one thing PGSM is setting my expectations for, it’s CONSEQUENCES. That PGSM is only going harder on Usagi and Naru’s friendship makes me SO EXCITED to see how it’s going to deal with all this.

One of the first things PGSM has established is that Naru is SMART. She’s observant and she’s quick-thinking. There’s zero percent chance she isn’t going to notice something’s up.

But is she maybe already beginning to wonder? Not about Usagi being Sailor Moon, that’s some time down the line, I figure. But she’s already wondering about Usagi suddenly bringing Ami into the fold. Now here’s Ami, only making it increasingly obvious that she’s not exactly at ease. Shit’s only going to get harder as Usagi starts avoiding stuff, and seeming to get closer to Ami for no reasons she can give or that Naru can understand, given what she sees.

I was thinking this could be a potential path we’d be taking in the future. BUT WHAT IF WE’VE ALREADY STARTED

[keyofjetwolf]

VOICE OF REASON REI HINO

“Maybe give someone thirty seconds to get used to you, YOU’RE KIND OF A LOT.” Which is good, solid advice, honestly. Ami’s been craving connections with people her entire life, she can’t be expected to effortlessly slide into a space where all this isn’t new and terrifying and wonderful and overwhelming.

And of course Rei can absolutely relate here. She’s better about keeping her shit together, so she’s able to just quietly deal with adjusting, but all this is hard for her, too. Teammates? Friends?? Fighting evil is one thing, BUT THIS?

Usagi has it easy. Monster killing and interplanetary space princesses aside, she’s pretty much in her default. She doesn’t have all that, PLUS a massive shift in personal social norms. (Which, actually now I say that, is a way in which Ami truly is the odd one out here. Usagi’s used to having friends, Rei’s used to fighting evil, they’re each on some kind of familiar ground. What does Ami have? School? And she’s probably walking around with a low-key perpetual scream waiting for that to be a lie too.)

But also at the heart of this is Usagi’s own lack of patience, which again we can tie back to her lack of experience and perspective. She knows what she wants, and assumes that everyone ultimately wants the same thing, so that’s the star she steers her ship by. That there’s more going on, or that it may not be that simple, isn’t something she even recognizes as potentially existing, let alone take into consideration. Her intentions are good and her instincts solid, so she’s avoided a lot of problems, but that also means she hasn’t learned a damned thing about being wrong, up to and including that it’s even a possibility.

ENJOY YOUR CRASH COURSE USAGI

[keyofjetwolf]

And Usagi cutting right to the meat of it. You don’t have to follow the tutorial in a book, you don’t have to score 100% on any test, we’re just friends, it’s that simple! Because of course, for Usagi, it IS. But still, Usagi’s perspective is so hemmed in by her own understanding of things. She doesn’t need Ami to sing karaoke to be her friend (SORRY REI), but also, she’s been completely hung up on Ami calling her “Tsukino-san”, and while that wasn’t a PROBLEM, when Ami put in the effort to change it, Usagi rewarded the behaviour, and basically this is all such a completely beautiful organic clusterfuck.

Usagi felt that “Tsukino-san” was a barrier between them and pushed hard for it to fall, but she never stopped to ask Ami why she put it there in the first place. It never occurred to her to dig into what was Ami’s deal, she just barreled into nagging a symptom to fuck off, and then called it a day. Usagi, precious bunny of big heart and little brain, just doesn’t consider it’s not that simple. “But she called me Usagi-chan! It’s all better now!”

Meanwhile, to Ami, the data is contradictory and there are no answers in the back of the book, and she’s drowning trying to make sense of something that sometimes just wonderfully and naturally IS.

I love them. They’re barely speaking the same language, AND I LOVE THEM.

[keyofjetwolf]

I know this is not entirely the spirit of Sailor Moon, so I don’t actually expect it, but if Ami were to pull out a handaxe right now and go on a murderous rampage through Tokyo, I’d be “Seems legit.”